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FILM: 2012 Sundance Pictures

2012-01-31T14:32:00.002-05:00

Getting silly for Entertainment Weekly:

The cast of For a Good Time, Call...

Jake M. Johnson

Aaron Paul

Octavia Spencer

Carrie Preston

The cast of Celeste and Jesse Forever

Rashida Jones and Adam Samberg

Rashida Jones

Gina Rodriguez from Filly Brown

Lake Bell

Peter Dinklage

FILM: 35 Star-Studded 2012 Sundance Films

2012-01-30T18:15:00.000-05:00

This is an extremely superficial breakdown of all the well-known actors featured at Sundance this year. As a result, it only lists the well-known actors, directors, and screenwriters behind them:

2 Days in New York [comedy]

DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Julie Delpy
CAST: Julie Delpy, Chris Rock
SYNOPSIS: A biracial/bi-continental couple's relationship is tested when her family visits for two days, and race and sex are put on the table.
THE DRAW: Delpy also wrote and directed a film called 2 Days in Paris with a similar situation, and she's been quoted as saying that this is a sequel, a continuation of this woman's exploration of tumultuous relationships. It should be interesting to see how things play out when her lover is a black man this time.

28 Hotel Rooms [drama]

CAST: Chris Messina, Marin Ireland ("Mildred Pierce")

SYNOPSIS: While traveling for work in a city far from their homes, a novelist and a corporate accountant find themselves in bed together. Although she’s married, and he’s seeing someone, their intense attraction turns a one-night stand into an unexpected relationship and a respite from the obligations of daily life. Through a series of moments—some profound, some silly, some intensely intimate—we see a portrait of an evolving relationship that could become the most significant one of their lives.

THE DRAW: Messina is one of those criminally overlooked actors that's rarely given meaty roles
like this.
WATCH THE TRAILER!

Arbitrage [drama/thriller]

CAST: Richard Gere, Susan Sarandon, Tim Roth ("Lie to Me"), Brit Marling (Another Earth), Nate Parker (Red Tails), model Laetitia Casta
SYNOPSIS: A successful businessman scrambles to sell his company before his fraud is uncovered.
THE DRAW: Gere's always good under pressure and he's been getting rave reviews.
WATCH A CLIP!

The Arm [short/comedy/drama]

DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Jessie Ennis, Brie Larson (Kate in "The United States of Tara"), and Sarah Ramos (Haddie in "Parenthood")
CAST: Miles Heizer ("Parenthood"), Jessica Hecht (Sideways), Allie Grant ("Suburgatory"), Logan Miller ("I'm in the Band")

SYNOPSIS: To keep up with social pressure in a technologically advanced world, Chance (Heizer) starts a texting relationship with Genevieve—a girl he meets at a yogurt shop. But when tragedy befalls his crush, he's forced to realize that he was never in a relationship at all.

THE DRAW: Because the female screenwriter craze has spread even to the youth, and Heizer rarely gets to do anything on his family drama except pout and roll his eyes.

Bachelorette [comedy]
CAST: Kirsten Dunst, Isla Fisher (Confession of a Shopaholic), Lizzy Caplan ("Party Down"), James Marsden, Adam Scott ("Parks and Recreation"), Kyle Bornheimer ("Perfect Couples"), Rebel Wilson (Bridesmaids)
SYNOPSIS: Regan (Dunst) is used to being first at everything. Imagine her horror and chagrin when she finds out the girl everyone called Pig Face (Wilson) in high school is going to tie the knot before she does! But Regan sucks it up and takes on bridesmaid duties along with her childhood pals: substance-abusing, promiscuous Gena (Caplan) and ditzy Katie (Fisher). The single ladies are determined to put their bitterness aside and have an awesomely hedonistic bachelorette party.
THE DRAW: It's more of a female Hangover than another Bridesmaids, and it's said to push the envelope in terms of females hating on other females.
WATCH A CLIP!

Bear [short/comedy/drama]

SCREENWRITER: Nash Edgerton (brother to Joel), David Michod (Animal Kingdom)
CAST: Nash Edgerton, Teresa Palmer (I Am Number Four)

SYNOPSIS: Jack means well, but sometimes good intentions have horrible consequences.

THE DRAW: I mean after that teaser, do you have to ask?
WATCH THE TRAILER!

Black Rock [thriller]
DIRECTOR: Katie Aselton
SCREENWRITER: Mark Duplass (Cyrus)
CAST: Kate Bosworth, Lake Bell, Katie Aselton ("The League")
SYNOPSIS: Sarah invites her old friends, Abby and Lou, on a reunion trip to a remote island in Maine. It’s the sort of weekend that can transform the three into fully realized, grown-ass women. Emotional release will come, but this is no weepy ballad of reconciliation. It's a taut, satisfying thriller.
THE DRAW: The mystery that turns it from drama to thriller.

Celeste and Jesse Forever [drama comedy]
DIRECTOR: Lee Toland Krieger (The Vicious Kind)
SCREENWRITER: Rashida Jones, Will McCormack
CAST: Rashida Jones, Andy Samberg, Chris Messina (Julie & Julia), Ari Graynor (Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist), Emma Roberts, Elijah Wood
SYNOPSIS: Celeste and Jesse met in high school and got married young. They laugh at the same jokes and finish each other’s sentences. They are forever linked in their friends’ minds as the perfect couple—she, a high-powered businesswoman and budding novelist; he, a free spirit who keeps things from getting boring. Their only problem is that they have decided to get divorced. Can their perfect relationship withstand this minor setback?
THE DRAW: You have to get on board for the new wave of actresses-turned-screenwriters. Plus, Samberg needs a breakout role desperately, so his career doesn't live-and-die on the "SNL" lot.

The End of Love [drama]
DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Mark Webber
CAST: Mark Webber, Shannyn Sossamon (40 Days and 40 Nights), Michael Cera, Jason Ritter ("Parenthood"), Amanda Seyfried
SYNOPSIS: Mark is a struggling actor stuck between the life he once knew and the one waiting for him. When the mother of his two-year-old son suddenly passes away, Mark is forced to confront his shortcomings. Their fates, now intertwined, hang in the balance as Mark grapples with his ability to grow up. When he meets Lydia, a young mother, he is no longer able to live in the comfort of denial.
THE DRAW: It's an interesting mix of actors, and it's always good to see what Cera and Ritter will do next.

Excision [horror]
CAST: AnnaLynne McCord ("90210"), Traci Lords (Cry-Baby), Ariel Winter ("Modern Family"), Roger Bart (Stepford Wives), Jeremy Sumpter ("Friday Night Lights"), John Waters
SYNOPSIS: Pauline (McCord) isn’t your typical teen. She picks scabs, dissects road kill, and fantasizes about performing surgery on strangers. Her fascinations disturb her parents and her classmates. Pauline reserves special disdain for “the church” and her “therapist,” Reverend William (Waters), who, in Pauline's mind, is in no position to judge, or indulge in, her psychosexual fantasies. No one understands Pauline except for Grace (Winter), her younger sister, who suffers from cystic fibrosis. An outcast at school and at home, Pauline decides she is ready to lose her virginity...and this is when the weirdness really begins.
THE DRAW: McCord is the brightest star on her teen series, so it's best we start to see range now before it's inevitably canceled.

The First Time [romance/drama/comedy]
DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Jonathan Kasdan (In the Land of Women)
CAST: Britt Robertson ("Secret Circle"), Dylan O'Brien ("Teen Wolf"), Craig Roberts (Submarine), James Frecheville (Animal Kingdom), Victoria Justice ("Victorious"), Christine Taylor (Dodgeball)
SYNOPSIS: Dave (O'Brien), a high school senior, spends most of his time pining for a girl he can’t have. Aubrey (Robertson), a junior with artistic aspirations, has a hot boyfriend who doesn’t quite understand her or seem to care. Although they go to different schools, Dave and Aubrey find themselves at the same party. When both head outside to get some air, they meet. A casual conversation sparks an instant connection, and, over the course of a weekend, things turn magical, romantic, complicated, and funny as Aubrey and Dave discover what it's like to fall in love for the first time.
THE DRAW: The fact that films like these, where characters have but a few hours to legitimize their claim of insta-love, are difficult to execute.

For a Good Time, Call... [comedy]
SCREENWRITER: Katie Anne Naylon, Lauren Anne Miller
CAST: Ari Graynor (Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist), Lauren Anne Miller, Justin Long, Mark Webber, James Wolk ("Lone Star" and "Shameless"), Nia Vardalos
SYNOPSIS: College "frenemies" Lauren (Miller) and Katie (Graynor) move in together after losing a relationship and rent control, respectively. Sharing Katie's late grandmother's apartment in New York City, the girls bicker with each other until one fateful night, when Katie's noisy bedroom activities make Lauren barge in and discover a dirty little secret. This revelation brings them closer together, and Lauren (the brains) and Katie (the talent) concoct a wildly successful phone sex business.
THE DRAW: Not even going to pretend it's not because it was co-written and stars Seth Rogen's fiancee.

For Ellen [drama]
CAST: Paul Dano, Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite), Jena Malone (Sucker Punch), Margarita Levieva ("Revenge" and Adventureland)
SYNOPSIS: After an overnight long-distance drive, Joby (Dano) has a special meeting—with lawyers and his ex-wife. A struggling musician with the prerequisite tattoos, slimy hair, goatee, and his head firmly floating in the clouds, Joby hasn’t been around to be a dad. Now is his last chance to fight for shared custody of his daughter, Ellen.
THE DRAW: Indies are Dano's bread-and-butter. Not one boring performance to date.

Goat [comedy]
SCREENWRITER: Adapted by Mark Poirier (Smart People)
CAST: Graham Phillips ("The Good Wife"), David Duchovny, Vera Farmiga, Ty Burrell ("Modern Family"), Justin Kirk ("Weeds"), Keri Russell
SYNOPSIS: Having a self-absorbed New Age mother (Farmiga) and an estranged father (Burrell) means 15-year-old Ellis Whitman (Phillips) has grown up relying on an unconventional guardian: a goat-trekking, marijuana-growing sage called Goat Man (Duchovny). So when Ellis decides to leave the alternative ways of his desert homestead for a stuffy East Coast prep school, major changes are in store. But not in the way you’d think. Though often stoned, the exceedingly smart and capable Ellis effortlessly aces school and excels at track. As the year progresses, it’s his relationships with the adults in his life that test him, challenging his beliefs about responsibility and trustworthiness.
THE DRAW: Phillips rarely gets screen time on his CBS law drama, so it'd be good to see if he's a new addition to young Hollywood.
WATCH THE TRAILER!

Lay the Favorite [comedy]
DIRECTOR: Stephen Frears (The Queen)
WRITER: D.V. DeVincentis (High Fidelity)
CAST: Rebecca Hall (The Town), Bruce Willis, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Joshua Jackson, Laura Prepon ("Are You There Chelsea"), Vince Vaughn
SYNOPSIS: Beth Raymer (Hall) is a beautiful girl with a big heart who leaves her dancing job at a Florida strip club to become a Las Vegas cocktail waitress. Not exactly an ideal career choice, but her borderline-ditzy personality doesn’t give her many options. In walks Dink (Willis), a professional sports bettor who sees through her bubbly exterior and offers her a job placing wagers all over town to gain an advantage over the casinos. Her surprisingly impeccable mind for numbers soon cements her status as Dink’s good-luck charm, until his gorgeous-but-frigid wife, Tulip (Zeta-Jones), starts to get jealous. Faced with no other choice but to fire Beth, Dink’s luck runs out when she heads to New York to work for a smarmy bookie, a turn of events that lands her squarely on the wrong side of the law.
THE DRAW: Hall is known for pretty serious roles, so she's due for a comedy.
WATCH THE TRAILER!

Liberal Arts [drama/comedy]
DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Josh Radnor (Happythankyoumoreplease)
CAST: Josh Radnor ("How I Met Your Mother"), Elizabeth Olsen (Martha Marcy May Marlene), Richard Jenkins (The Visitor), Allison Janney (The Help), Zac Efron, John Magaro (My Soul to Take), Elizabeth Reaser (Twilight)
SYNOPSIS: Newly single, 35, and uninspired by his job, Jesse Fisher (Radnor) worries that his best days are behind him. But no matter how much he buries his head in a book, life keeps pulling Jesse back. When his favorite college professor invites him to campus to speak at his retirement dinner, Jesse jumps at the chance. He is prepared for the nostalgia of the dining halls and dorm rooms, the parties and poetry seminars; what he doesn’t see coming is Zibby (Olsen)—a beautiful, precocious, classical-music-loving sophomore. Zibby awakens scary, exciting, long-dormant feelings of possibility and connection that Jesse thought he had buried forever.
THE DRAW: Radnor didn't disappoint with his first indie effort, and Olsen is one of 2011's breakout stars.

LUV [drama]
CAST: Rapper Common (Just Wright), Michael Rainey Jr., Dennis Haysbert ("The Unit"), Danny Glover, Charles S. Dutton, Michael Kenneth Williams ("The Wire" and "Boardwalk Empire")
SYNOPSIS: Woody, an adorable 11-year-old boy (Rainey Jr.) awaiting the return of his missing mother, lives with his grandmother and Uncle Vincent (Common), who is fresh off an eight-year prison stint. For Woody, the confident, charismatic Vincent is a titan among men. When Vincent notices that Woody could learn a thing or two about becoming a man, he brings him along as he ventures forth to open his own business. But when legit life fails to support Vincent’s vision, and his old Baltimore crime boss, Mr. Fish, haunts him, the pace of little Woody’s manhood lesson accelerates.
THE DRAW: To see a more dramatic side to the dedicated rapper-turned-actor.

Nobody Walks [drama]
CAST: John Krasinski, Olivia Thirlby (The Wackness), Jane Levy ("Suburgatory") Rosemarie DeWitt (Rachel Getting Married), Justin Kirk ("Weeds"), India Ennenga (The Women), Dylan McDermott
SYNOPSIS: Martine (Thirlby), a 23-year-old artist from New York, arrives in Los Angeles to stay in the pool house of a family living in the hip and hilly community of Silver Lake. Peter (Krasinski), the father, has agreed to help Martine complete sound design on her art film as a favor to his wife. Martine innocently enters the seemingly idyllic life of this open-minded family with two kids and a relaxed Southern California vibe. Like a bolt of lightning, her arrival sparks a surge of energy that awakens suppressed impulses in everyone and forces them to confront their own fears and desires.
THE DRAW: Krasinski is a very funny guy, but he's yet to prove himself dramatically on the big screen.

Price Check [comedy/drama]
CAST: Parker Posey, Eric Mabius ("Ugly Betty"), Annie Parisse ("Law & Order"), Cheyenne Jackson ("30 Rock" and "Glee"), Edward Herrmann ("Gilmore Girls")
SYNOPSIS: Pete (Mabius) is a good guy who used to be cool. Once living his dream in the music industry, he now toils away in the pricing department of a failing supermarket chain to provide for his loving wife and young son. When Pete’s new boss, Susan (Posey), takes over the department, her high-energy enthusiasm and unconventional ideas start to shake things up. She aims to reinvent the company while grooming Pete for the executive fast track. Making more money now than he ever hoped to in the music industry, Pete begins to wonder if this new career is just what he needs to become the man he’s always wanted to be.
THE DRAW: Posey's got a knack for wacky characters. She makes Zooey Deschanel look like an amateur.
WATCH A CLIP!

Red Lights [thriller]
DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Rodrigo Cortés (Buried)
CAST: Cillian Murphy, Sigourney Weaver, Robert De Niro, Elizabeth Olsen (Martha Marcy May Marlene), Toby Jones (Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy), Leonardo Sbaraglia
SYNOPSIS: Two investigators of paranormal hoaxes, the veteran Dr. Margaret Matheson (Weaver) and her young assistant, Tom Buckley (Murphy), study the most varied metaphysical phenomena with the aim of proving their fraudulent origins. Simon Silver (De Niro), a legendary blind psychic, reappears after an enigmatic absence of 30 years to become the greatest international challenge to both orthodox science and professional sceptics. Tom starts to develop an intense obsession with Silver, whose magnetism becomes stronger with each new manifestation of inexplicable events. As Tom gets closer to Silver, tension mounts, and his worldview is threatened to its core.
THE DRAW: Cortés built his state-side reputation on his risky first American indie, which largely took place in a grave. It should be interesting to see what he can do with multiple characters and locations.
WHAT THE TEASER!

Robot and Frank [comedy/drama/sci-fi]
CAST: Frank Langella, Susan Sarandon, James Marsden, Liv Tyler, Peter Saarsgard
SYNOPSIS: Set in the near future, it's an offbeat buddy movie about an elderly ex-jewel thief and his new caretaker robot.
THE DRAW: Futuristic stories about the human condition always reveal compelling observations.

Safety Not Guaranteed [comedy]
CAST: Aubrey Plaza ("Parks and Recreation"), Mark Duplass ("The League"), Jake Johnson ("New Girl" and Paper Heart)
SYNOPSIS: Three magazine employees are sent to investigate a personal advertisement placed in the newspaper: guy seeking partner for time travel. They venture to the coast and set up a haphazard surveillance. Darius (Plaza) is recruited as the shill; her dry wit and cynical nature are perfectly suited to trap this enigmatic oddball, Kenneth (Duplass), and get a good story. But it is she who first sees past the paranoid loner façade to the compelling person inside. The drawback? This still doesn’t rule out the possibility that he just might be crazy.
THE DRAW: Plaza has improved tremendously since 2009's Mystery Team without sacrificing any of her oddball charm.

Save the Date [comedy/romance]
CAST: Lizzy Caplan ("Party Down"), Alison Brie ("Community"), Martin Starr ("Party Down"), Geoffrey Arend ("Body of Proof" and 500 Days of Summer), Mark Webber (Snow Day)
SYNOPSIS: Sarah finds herself caught in an intense postbreakup rebound with new infatuation Jonathan after tragically breaking the heart of rocker Kevin. Always one to give Sarah life advice is her sister Beth, who is diligently planning her upcoming wedding to apprehensive fiancé Andrew. Both sisters fumble through the bumpy emotional landscape of modern-day relationships, forced to relearn how to love and be loved.
THE DRAW: Caplan is due for a breakout role.

Shadow Dancer [drama/thriller]
DIRECTOR: James Marsh (Project Nim & Man on Wire)
CAST: Andrea Riseborough (W.E.), Clive Owen, Aidan Gillen ("Game of Thrones" and Blitz), Domhnall Gleeson (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), Gillian Anderson
SYNOPSIS: Growing up in a Republican family in 1970s Belfast, Collette McVeigh’s (Riseborough) childhood is shattered, and her family radicalized, when her brother is killed. Twenty years later—a single mother with her own young son—Collette is active in the IRA, along with her two surviving brothers. During an aborted bomb attempt in London, Collette falls into the hands of an MI5 officer, Mac (Owen), who offers her a deal: turn informant or go to prison. Fearing for her son’s welfare, she returns to Belfast where—betraying family and beliefs—she becomes a reluctant mole for British intelligence. As suspicion of Collette mounts and Mac takes increasing risks to protect her, both feel the net closing in.
THE DRAW: It should be interesting to see the well-known documentary director get back to fictional drama to see if he still has the same appeal in the U.S.

Sleepwalk With Me
DIRECTOR: Mike Birbiglia
SCREENWRITER: Mike Birbiglia, Ira Glass ("This American Life"), Joe Birbiglia, Seth Barrish
CAST: Comedian Mike Birbiglia (Cedar Rapids), Lauren Ambrose ("Six Feet Under"), James Rebhorn, Carol Kane, Aya Cash ("Traffic Light")
SYNOPSIS: We are thrust into the tale of a burgeoning stand-up comedian struggling with the stress of a stalled career, a stale relationship threatening to race out of his control, and the wild spurts of severe sleepwalking he is desperate to ignore.
THE DRAW: He jumped out of a window while sleepwalking—like for real. There's plenty evidence of comedians reaching a breaking point, but never while unconscious.
WATCH A CLIP!

Smashed [comedy/drama]
DIRECTOR: James Ponsoldt (Off the Black)
CAST: Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Scott Pilgrim vs. The World), Aaron Paul ("Breaking Bad"), Octavia Spencer (The Help), Nick Offerman ("Parks and Recreation"), Megan Mullally ("Will & Grace"), Mary Kay Place ("Big Love")
SYNOPSIS: Kate (Winstead) and Charlie (Paul) like to have a good time. Their marriage thrives on a shared fondness for music, laughter...and getting smashed. When Kate’s partying spirals into hard-core asocial behavior, compromising her job as an elementary schoolteacher, something’s got to give. But change isn’t exactly a cakewalk. Sobriety means she will have to confront the lies she’s been spinning at work, her troubling relationship with her mother, and the nature of her bond with Charlie.
THE DRAW: Paul is riding on accolades from his drug-fueled series, and it's time he parlays that into softer roles.

Something From Nothing: The Art of Rap [documentary]
DIRECTOR: Ice-T and Andy Baybutt
CAST: Bun-B, B-Real, Afrika Bambaataa, Ice Cube, Chuck D., Dr. Dre, Snoop Dog, Mos Def, Common, Joe Budden, Salt of Salt n Pepa, KRS-One, MC Lyte, Nas, Q-Tip, Raekwon, Rakim, Redman, Joseph Simmons, Kanye West, Xzibit, and many more
SYNOPSIS: A performance documentary about the runaway juggernaut that is hip-hop.
THE DRAW: Music documentaries tend to be very interesting, because we rarely get to hear what artists think about what they do and how they do it, since they're usually so busy trying to sell their image.

The Surrogate [drama]
CAST: John Hawkes (Winter's Bone), Helen Hunt, William H. Macy
SYNOPSIS: The quest for love appears insurmountable when a man (Hawkes) confined to an iron lung determines, at age 38, to lose his virginity. Based on the autobiographical writings of Berkeley, California–based journalist and poet Mark O’Brien, it chronicles his attempt to transcend the limbo between childhood and adulthood, in which he is literally trapped. With the blessing of an unusual priest (Macy) and support from enlightened caregivers, the poignantly optimistic and always droll O’Brien swallows his fear and hires a sex surrogate (Hunt).
THE DRAW: It's an interesting human experience to explore.

That's What She Said [comedy]
DIRECTOR: Carrie Preston
CAST: Anne Heche ("Hung"), Alia Shawkat ("Arrested Development" and Whip It), Marcia DeBonis ("Lipstick Jungle")
SYNOPSIS: Longtime best friends Bebe (DeBonis) and DeeDee (Heche) are both wrestling with love. Bebe has met someone new and is in the exuberant phase of a budding romance. DeeDee is trying to move on from someone she can’t forget—mostly in destructive ways, like alcohol and chain smoking. As Bebe waits for the perpetually late DeeDee at their favorite coffee shop, she meets Clementine (Shawkat), a distraught young woman who can't keep a boyfriend due to her nymphomania. With Clementine in tow, Bebe and DeeDee soon embark on the kind of outrageous misadventure that only New York City can offer.
THE DRAW: New York is the best city to have adventures in. And who doesn't miss Shawkat?
WATCH THE TRAILER!

This Must Be The Place [comedy/drama]
CAST: Sean Penn, Frances McDormand, Judd Hirsch ("Numb3rs"), Eve Hewson, Kerry Condon ("Luck"), Harry Dean Stanton ("Big Love")
SYNOPSIS: Cheyenne (Penn), the bizarre, disconnected former lead singer of an iconic goth rock band, is rich and living in a palatial estate with his down-to-earth wife, Jane (McDormand). Emotionally distant from his disapproving father since adolescence and facing a midlife crisis, he undertakes to make things right by, of all things, hunting a Nazi who tormented his father in a concentration camp. The resulting detective work and road trip lead the emotionally unmoored Cheyenne to self-realizations, human connections, and a showdown perhaps more surprising than any other in movie lore.
THE DRAW: Penn being Penn.
WATCH THE TRAILER!

Tim and Eric's Billion Dollar Movie [comedy]
DIRECTOR: Tim Heidecker, Eric Wareheim
CAST: Tim Heidecker, Eric Wareheim, Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Zach Galifianakis, Will Forte
SYNOPSIS: Tim and Eric are given a billion dollars to make a movie but squander every dime, and the sinister Schlaaang Corporation is pissed. Their lives at stake, the guys skip town in search of some way to pay the money back. They happen upon a chance to rehabilitate a bankrupt mall full of vagrants, bizarre stores, and a man-eating wolf that stalks the food court, and they see dollar signs—a billion of them.
THE DRAW: I dunno. I guess if you like their TV show, and for the cameos.

Una Hora Por Favora [short/comedy]
DIRECTOR/SCREENWRITER: Jill Soloway ("Six Feet Under," "The United States of Tara," and "How to Make It In America")
CAST: Wilmer Valderrama, Michaela Watkins ("Enlightened" and The Back-Up Plan)
SYNOPSIS: A woman hires a day laborer for an hour and gets more than she bargained for.
THE DRAW: Watkins is grossly underappreciated considering how hilarious she is, and I'm a little intrigued by the plot teaser.
WATCH THE SHORT!

Wish You Were Here [drama/mystery]
CAST: Joel Edgerton (Warrior), Teresa Palmer (I Am Number Four), Felicity Price ("Home and Away"), Antony Starr
SYNOPSIS: Expectant parents Alice (Price) and Dave (Edgerton) join Alice’s younger sister, Steph (Palmer), and her new boyfriend, Jeremy (Starr), on an impromptu tropical getaway in Cambodia. But following Jeremy’s abrupt disappearance, the others must attempt to return to their normal lives in Sydney. The shell-shocked survivors' recovery begins to fall apart when a stinging truth about their time in Cambodia is revealed. The three must contend with the fallout, along with the looming threat of further revelations about that fateful night.
THE DRAW: The mystery.
WATCH THE TRAILER!

The Words [drama/thriller]
DIRECTORS/SCREENWRITERS: Brian Klugman & Lee Sternthal (TRON: Legacy)
CAST: Bradley Cooper, Jeremy Irons, Dennis Quaid, Olivia Wilde, Zoe Saldana, Ben Barnes (The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian)
SYNOPSIS: Rory Jansen (Cooper), a struggling writer, aspires to be the next great literary voice. When he discovers a lost manuscript in a weathered attaché case, he realizes he possesses something extraordinary that he desperately wishes he had created. Rory decides to pass the work off as his own and finally receives the recognition he desperately craves. However, he soon learns that living with his choice will not be as easy as he thought as he faces a moral dilemma that will make him take a hard look at the man he has become.
THE DRAW: Cooper has proven with the indie Limitless that he does well with morally conflicted characters.

Your Sister's Sister [comedy/drama]
DIRECTOR: Lynn Shelton (Humpday)
CAST: Emily Blunt, Rosemarie DeWitt (Rachel Getting Married), Mark Duplass ("The League"), comedian Mike Birbiglia (Cedar Rapids)
SYNOPSIS: One year after his brother’s death, Jack (Duplass) hasn’t recovered. His best friend, Iris (Blunt), prescribes solitary reflection and sends him to her father’s empty cabin. But she doesn’t realize her sister, Hannah (DeWitt), is there for similar reasons, having just walked out on a seven-year relationship. Over tequila shots, Hannah and Jack get acquainted. When Iris drops in unexpectedly, complications arise in the form of rivalry and more than a few surprising revelations.
THE DRAW: Because Blunt has a knack for both comedy and drama, and rarely gets to showcase both simultaneously.

*All film plots were cribbed from either the Sundance website or IMDb.

FILM: The Actors with a Bad-Year Report Card for 2011

2012-01-17T11:04:00.000-05:00

Every year, there are a few actors who taint their reputation with crappy movies, crappy roles, and even crappier acting. It's painful to witness and terribly disappointing when you're confident that they can do better. Here are the worst offenders of the year and my pleas for them to stop:

Crimes Against Humanity: Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief and Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son

Dear Brandon T. Jackson,
Do you know how hard it is to shine in a movie starring such comedic heavyweights as Robert Downey, Jr., Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and Danny McBride? You do, right? Because you did. In Tropic Thunder. Three years ago. That was impressive. You had everyone laughing and wondering who's that kid, how did he get in this movie, and why haven't we seen him before? Now granted, there aren't that many funny young black man roles out there. And scoring in one movie isn't going to give you creative leeway to create your own. But at what point exactly did playing half-man half-goat seem like the logical next step? I will not blame the craptastic efforts of Percy Jackson on you completely. Even the hilarious Steve Coogan and the shamelessly funny Rosario Dawson were horrible in that movie. But I can blame you for agreeing to portray such a goofy and overacted character, AND for also agreeing to strap on a fat suit and play Martin Lawrence's son. I know what you were thinking when you got the call. It's Martin! MARTIIIIIN! I loved that show too. In the 90s. That Martin Lawrence is dead. And he died somewhere between Big Momma's House and Wild Hogs. It was a suicide. I suggest you stop being equally self-destructive before you end up being referred to as "that black guy from that black movie."

Sincerely,
Someone who is not looking forward to hearing you bleat in Percy Jackson 2

Redemption: If you found some way to get in on Bad Boys 3, set for 2015, or got a recurring role on a series.

Crimes Against Humanity: Something Borrowed

Dear Kate Hudson,
I have been a loyal viewer of your romantic comedies since 2003's How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I thought you were funny and spunky and not as derivative as all those other fragile damsels of yesteryear. So I stuck with you through Alex & Emma, Raising Helen, You, Me, and Dupree, Fool's Gold, My Best Friend's Girl, and Bride Wars. But the nail in the coffin of your rom-com career has to be Something Borrowed. Sure, playing a woman who has the gall to turn on her bff for "stealing" her fiancee after she gets knocked up with his best friend's baby would be considered branching out, but it would also be considered ridiculous. That woman was irredeemable, delusional, and impossible to love. I realize you didn't create her, but you made me watch her and that in and of itself is unforgivable. I get it. It's hard for you to get other roles because you're Goldie Hawn's bubbly blonde mini-me. You've tried to make critics and producers see you in another light with war dramas (The Four Feathers), horror movies (The Skeleton Key), thrillers (The Killer Inside Me), and musicals (Nine), but I feel like you're not trying hard enough. Katherine Heigl is kicking your ass. Meanwhile, you should be showing Jennifer Aniston, who wowed audiences this year in Just Go With It and Horrible Bosses, how it's done. You're Hollywood comedy royalty. Those bitches should be bowing to you. Take note from McConaughey and get out while you still can.

Sincerely,
Someone who is going to force herself to watch the sequel because it stars John Krasinski as the romantic lead.

Redemption: The thriller The Reluctant Fundamentalist with Kiefer Sutherland and Liev Schreiber.

Crimes Against Humanity: Letting Blake Lively outshine you

Dear Leighton Meester,
I did not watch The Roommate remake. I'm sure you were sufficiently insane. I did not mind your uptight big sister act in Monte Carlo. Wasn't that much of a stretch for you though, so I wasn't that impressed. I didn't even remember you did The Oranges. Thank God! Since apparently you seduce an old man in that movie. I finally got around to seeing 2010's Country Strong, yet another variation of your spoiled bitch routine, which you also did briefly in Going the Distance. I don't know if you can tell by how depressing your resume looks, but you're not doing too well. The end of "Gossip Girl" is nigh. It's time you start padding your resume with some impressive screen gems before you turn into Rachel Bilson, forced to pretend you enjoy starring in a series about Southern living, or even worse Mischa Barton, who's been relegated to C-list horror movies. Meanwhile, your costar Blake Lively is out there getting "chummy" with Leonard DiCaprio and Ryan Reynolds, casted by Ben Affleck in his film The Town, costarring in the comic book flick Green Lantern, and chosen to be in the highly anticipated Oliver Stone indie Savages. Leighton, listen to me, you're hilarious. You are the best part of "Gossip Girl," hands down. Without you, it would just be a depressing whinefest starring Ed Westwick and Penn Badgley. Play to your strengths. You're funny, sexy, smart, and you can sing. Do something with all of that.

Sincerely,
A Dair Fan

Redemption: Costarring in Adam Sandler's father-son comedy Donny's Boy with Andy Samberg.

Crimes Against Humanity: No Strings Attached and Your Highness

Dear Natalie Portman,
Hey girl! Remember that time you were in every fanboy's wetdream, being so badass in The Professional, Star Wars, and V for Vendetta? You were so hot even a buzzcut couldn't fan your flames. You could do no wrong. Not when you were pretending to be a profane gangster rapper on "SNL," not when you were a skanky stripper in Closer, and not even when you went psycho in Black Swan. However, having a baby and winning an Oscar has now deleted you from the Hot Girl list in their masturbation diary. You were actually supposed to graduate to MILF, and by your scantily clad costume in Your Highness, that was practically a guarantee. Unfortunately, the real reason you were awesome was because you chose awesome movies. You never coasted on your looks—almost as if you didn't realize you had them. You didn't do things for the money, but the intrigue and the content. So tell me, what part of No Strings Attached or Your Highness or Thor made you think "Winner"? I realize you have responsibilities now. Your baby daddy is a ballerina so...you're basically responsible for all the bills. I respect your determination to do whatever it takes to make a buck. But I would rather you resort to actually stripping than ever have to endure another movie about dicks and pot, or your half-assed attempt at playing a romantic lead in a rom-com. You weren't phoning it in, you were practically texting it. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a carrier pigeon involved. Thirteen-year-old you would look at you know and say, "Seriously? Metal thong?"

Sincerely,
Someone with self-respect

Redemption: Raising your son Aleph to be normal.

Crimes Against Humanity: Hop & Arthur

Dear Russell Brand,
Only two short years ago you were a rebel comedian who looked like a rockstar. Americans were a little slow on the uptake when it came to your clever jokes, and they didn't fully embrace you and your British snark until they saw how effortlessly cool and funny you were in Jason Segel's Forgetting Sarah Marshall. After that, America embraced your open-condescension and overlooked your druggy, sex-crazed past in favor of watching you play a variation of overgrown manchildren in films, like Get Him to the Greek and Arthur. But that's not what I thought you were going with your whole funny grunge schtick. Your comedy special Russell Brand in New York starred a very self-aware, culturally informed, intelligent critic of society. You raised the bar on humor to include more than just dick jokes and sight gags. You were like Ricky Gervais's younger, slimmer, criminal brother—like Sacha Baron Cohen's non-theatrical twin. By all accounts you should've made a huge splash in the American world of comedy, changing the face of it forever. Instead, you combed your hair, did a romantic comedy and married a popstar. I'd call you a sellout, but I think it was hardly worth it. We want you to make us laugh again. Stop preaching about sobriety and true love. Keep writing thought-provoking articles about pop culture for The Guardian. Keep doing comedy specials for HBO or Comedy Central. And, most of all, keep being British. Americans are boring, remember?

Sincerely,
Someone who doesn't need a translator when listening to your jokes

Redemption: The adaptation Rock of Ages with Tom Cruise and the untitled Diablo Cody religion comedy, based on Steven Spielberg's idea.

Crimes Against Humanity: Green Lantern

Dear Ryan Reynolds,
You are an extremely funny dude. I knew you'd be hot shit some day back in '98 when you stole every scene of "Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place." I knew it when you managed to revive the awesomeness that once were National Lampoon films with 2002's Van Wilder. And I knew when you started getting tapped for every handsome-yet-goofy role under the sun, from Just Friends to The Proposal. You were like Jim Carrey toned down on the crazy meter, from a 10 to a 6. Comic relief was your thing, so much so that they asked you to add a little humor to both Blade: Trinity and X-Men Origins: Wolverine. It made perfect sense that someone as charismatic and charming as you should be a superhero one day. Playing Hal Jordan, aka the Green Lantern, was practically your destiny. One thing though, you probably should've read the script first. It made The Green Hornet look good. It made that other green guy, The Hulk, in both incarnations, look good. A punch? Really? The world is about to come to an end. You can manifest anything out of thin air or morph into anything and you choose a giant fist? Seriously? How incredibly unimaginative! A 5 year old with ADHD probably would've come up with something better. I honestly think you were just being greedy. You were already in a comic book film and getting your own spinoff. Did you really have to play yet another character? And don't even get me started on your love life. You went from Scarlett Johansson, a girl who is 8 years younger than you, to Blake Lively, a girl who is 11 years younger than you. You keep it up and you'll be branded a pedophile, all the while missing out on the incredible and age-appropriate laugh factory that is your former costar Sandra Bullock. Sure, she's 13 years older than you and still healing after her divorce from that no-good, cheating, white supremacist dipshit, but I think it's time you grow up in all aspects of your life.

Sincerely,
Someone who laughs at your jokes while staring at your abs—double-dipping

Redemption: The thriller Safe House with Denzel Washington, the graphic novel adaptation R.I.P.D. with Jeff Bridges and Kevin Bacon, and the spinoff comic adaptation Deadpool.

Crimes Against Humanity: Dating Justin Bieber

Dear Selena Gomez,
There aren't that many young actresses who play interesting characters. They're usually boy crazy, overly-bubbly, and boring. Your character on "Wizards of Waverly Place," Alex, however, may have been a law-breaking, magic-stealing, juvy-bound delinquent, but she was funny and memorable, which is more than I can say about 90% of the characters on the Disney channel. As far as I'm concerned, you and iCarly's Miranda Cosgrove and Jennette McCurdy are the coolest teenagers on Disney and NICK. I was certain when you first made me laugh a few years ago that you would one day outshine your Disney predecessors Hilary Duff and Miley Cyrus. But once you started to venture out on your own with albums and non-Waverly-related films, it became apparent that the public was taking a little longer to acknowledge your talent. So it's my theory that the only reason you gave Justin Bieber the time of day is because he raises your profile. You are now one of the most talked about young starlets and singers in the business. Except now there's no real reason for all the chatter. Your music isn't that great, although your singing has gotten better—Cyrus better, not Adele better. And your choice in movies, Monte Carlo, are the same as before. The only change in your life really is who you're currently banging—and yeah, we all know you're banging. I thought you were better than that. Sure, you're not airing out your dirty laundry like your BFF Taylor Swift, or selling your harrowing self-mutilation stories like your ex-BFF Demi Lovato, or dancing on a pole like Cyrus, but pimping yourself out so that you can remain famous is called fame-whoring. If you're using the same methods as a Kardashian to stay in the spotlight, you know you've made a wrong turn.

Sincerely,
Someone immune to Bieber Fever

Redemption: The Brokedown Palace-like crime drama Spring Breakers with James Franco and Vanessa Hudgens.

Crimes Against Humanity: The Hangover Part 2

Dear Zach Galifianakis,
What the fuck man? You were good! You were riding high off that Hangover buzz. You could've had anything you asked for. Look at Bradley Cooper. Sexiest Man Alive?! Pfft!!! Bought and paid for with his popularity. Everybody knows that The Gos was robbed. The only reason Cooper slid right on in there is because he wooed the gays (Valentine's Day), acted like a badass for the guys (The A-Team), and rubbed elbows with De Niro for the critics (Limitless). What the fuck have you been doing? Other than regurgitating the same personality for every single fucking moving AND TV show you do. I let 2010's Dinner for Schmucks and Due Date slide because you tried to "get real" with the indie adaptation It's Kind of a Funny Story and was cracked me up on HBO's "Bored to Death." But that abomination you call a sequel, The Hangover Part II, was an insult to my intelligence. Repackaging the same bullshit in a different country for an even lamer missing person, and slapping a damn monkey on it? Are you fucking joking? And then you went kiddie on me with Puss in Boots and The Muppets? No wonder your series was cancelled. HBO is as over you as the rest of us.

Sincerely,
Someone with a Sense of Humor

Redemption: He'll costar in the political comedy Dog Fight with Will Ferrell and Jason Sudeikis...but don't hold your breath because it's co-written by the writer of Land of the Lost and The Other Guys.

Crimes Against Humanity: The film New Year's Eve

Dear 90% of The cast of New Year's Eve,
I shall address you all individually for each of your crimes within this film:
Robert De Niro: Are you lost?
Halle Berry: Just because no one wants to see you be serious (Things We Lost in the Fire and Frankie & Alice) doesn't mean you get to trick us into it with your incredibly depressing long distance relationship.
Hilary Swank: The next time I see you spouting some romanticized bullshit on screen, I will petition the academy to revoke BOTH your Oscars. I would rather see you in the sequel to the Karate Kid remake than watch you get giggly over a guy again. Character-acting is what you do. Do you see Daniel Day-Lewis? Have you seen him in a romantic comedy? No? That's because he's fucking Daniel Day-Lewis. Even Meryl Streep can't pull off romantic comedies (It's Complicated and Mamma Mia!). It's not your thing. Stop doing it.
Josh Duhamel: I like it when you're taking charge and blowing shit up (Transformers). Please God, go do more of that.
Ludacris: I don't even understand what you were doing in this movie. You were like an overdressed personal assistant to a neurotic overachiever. A 20-year-old no-name could've done your role. And no one should've done your role in No Strings Attached. You were useless and easily forgettable. You've proven you can handle dramas (Crash) and comedy (Fast and Furious). Don't sell yourself short.
Katherine Heigl: *sigh* Girl don't you already have like 8 billion rom-coms under your belt? Was this one even remotely necessary? Also, your character was nonsensical. Who accepts a rockstar's proposal and then expects them to quit being a rockstar? And who slaps someone twice in one day and then forgives them at the end of it? Did she forget her medication somewhere?
Jon Bon Jovi: You were 16 years older than your costar. No matter how attractive you might still be at 49, that's still gross.
Sarah Jessica Parker: Honestly, I don't know how you'll ever top "Sex and the City," but I can assure you playing second fiddle to a teenager aint it.
Abigail Breslin: I think you're old enough to accept constructive criticism without crying: You sound like a boy-crazed ditz. Please don't resort to fame-whoring. The slow-and-steady win the race. And the cheaters get chlamydia.
Seth Meyers: I basically tune into "SNL" every Saturday night/Sunday morning to watch your "Weekend Update" at midnight. You were one of the most consistently funny components of that variety show. You wanna know why you're consistently funny? Because you help write your own jokes. That's what makes all comedians funny. Reading someone else's jokes rarely if ever works. Ask Ricky Gervais, Russell Brand, and Dane Cook.
Jessica Biel: Congratulations on your engagement! Not many people know how hilarious you are. And no one will learn that after seeing this movie. You were much better in Valentine's Day, and that bar was pretty low.
Ashton Kutcher: Some would say capitalizing off of Charlie Sheen's misfortune and stealing his series has bestowed bad luck upon you, what with your divorce and the slew of craptacular films you've been shelling out, but I don't think all is lost. You were surprisingly convincing for the serious spy segments of Killers. You should look into that. Just because you're tall and lanky doesn't mean you have to be the class clown in everything you do.
Lea Michele: Did you know that you sing every word you say? You can't be an actress if you can't speak normally. Work on that. Or don't. I have no problem just listening to you sing. Pick one though, for my ear's sake.
Til Schweiger: Are you lost?

Sincerely,
Someone who enjoyed about 5% of Valentine's Day

Redemption: Not appearing in the next holiday-related romance anthology.

FILM: The Best Films of 2011

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Here are my favorite movies of the year and why you should add them to your queue:

Best Action Film: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

When Michael Bay isn't being a douchebag, he's filming awesome action scenes that'll make your jaw drop, from a blender-like Decepticon devouring an entire building to a special forces team gliding through the sky to a rendezvous point. The world nearly ending has never looked so cool.

Best Action Film on a Small Budget: Attack the Block

You know how aliens tend to be green, slimy, reptilian and/or bug-like? You know how they have all this technology and they want to take over the world? You know how the world has to unite its armed forces in order to protect this planet from extinction? Ok, none of that happens in this movie—but NOT because they couldn't afford to add it in. This alien flick isn't about an alien invasion. It's about survival. There are these kids in these ghetto projects who basically raise themselves, and while they may have fun running amok and breaking the law, they're not exactly overjoyed to be subjected to this lifestyle. They've learned the lesson of "survival of the fittest" before most adults had to. And for one character, the gang leader, this invasion is more about proving to himself that he can survive the humans too. He fights for his life every day. The only difference is that that night he didn't just have to fend off a gun-happy pot dealer, but a blind gorilla-bear hybrid with glow-in-the-dark fangs. Yeah, you just read that right.

The Best Animated Film: The Adventures of Tintin

You know what makes an awesome animated film? It's ability to make you feel like you're not watching a cartoon. That's what made films like Toy Story, The Incredibles, and Up so impressive. A combination of their stellar graphics and heartwarming tales helped them tell real stories in surreal settings. Steven Spielberg brought that same endeavor to a beloved European animated character named Tintin. Sure, Tintin has a rather unrealistic pirate ship battle, crane fight, and a fearless and resourceful dog, but it all looks real—from the hair flipped on his noggin to the dust that floats through the air.

Best Biography: The Iron Lady

It was sort of a monologue where Margaret Thatcher took inventory of her life, weighing what was to be regretted and what was to be cherished as she said goodbye to her husband, who stood by her side loyally throughout the years despite her crippling neglect. Meryl Streep did an amazing job, disappearing into the iconic politician, not just in makeup but mannerism, posture, and emotion. It's an important film for both women and politicians to see, because of how it mirrors our current spiraling economy and the rebellions that have erupted because of it, and because they should witness bravery in the face of doubt. When the world draws the line at what it believes you are capable of, it is up to you to redraw it.

Best Chick Flick: Hanna

I've decided to redefine the term Chick Flick. It's no longer a derogatory slur towards "mind-numbing rom-coms that only women can endure." Now it means "movie that stars an empowered female." And by that definition, this movie qualifies. Saoirse Ronan plays a lethal teenager who trained her whole life to hunt down the woman who murdered her mother. Much like the silent assassins on-the-run in the Bourne saga and Salt, she mostly speaks with her eyes, is far more deadly than her appearance would suggest, and desperately craves affection. But her harrowing story of survival was even more poignant than there's were. She's just a kid. And she never really had the chance to be one. I'd sign on for a Hanna saga, if only to continue watching the seamless juxtaposition of her timid integration into society and her inability to assuage her homicidal instincts.

Best Comedy: Bridesmaids

Hands down, this was the funniest movie of the year. While Adam Sandler was making an ass out of himself in drag, and those Hangover dudes were running one good joke into the ground, Kristen Wiig and her band of merry maids were taking the world behind the scenes to see what it's really like to be a woman. In it, a bankrupt boyfriendless baker with low-self-esteem must witness her best friend enter the next stage in her life and possibly leave her behind. It took ladies off the pristine pedestal that Hollywood puts them on and showed a less attractive and less PG side to them that's far more realistic than ever before. Granted, not all chicks take unexpected dumps in the middle of the street, but it can happen, and it's only fair that they get to.

Best Comic Book Adaptation: X-Men: First Class
I know that hardcore fans found a lot of inconsistencies when they compared it to the first three films, but they can't deny that it was one of the better written, cast, and designed X-Men of them all. James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender were inspired casting choices, as was (surprisingly) Kevin Bacon, who dug up a soulless villain we didn't realize he could pull off. They told parallel legends of how a villain and a hero were born, and encapsulated the brotherhood between Magneto and Professor X that the other films merely hinted at, illustrating their inner struggles—one for compassion and the other for control. It did what the other films desperately intended. It humanized them.

Best Dark Comedy: Horrible Bosses

While it's true that most dark comedies don't have this much physical comedy, I'm going to make an exception because when three guys get together to murder their bosses and there's coke and thugs involved, it gets pretty dark. This film was essentially a revenge fantasy come to life. Every cubicle-filled office should install a two-way mirror, screen this film, add alcohol, and stir. The only way it can get darker than a cokehead racist misogynist, sexually aggressive blackmailing rapist, and an insensitive job-stealing idea poacher being your boss is if you turned out the lights.

Best Dramedy: 50/50

Seth Rogen and Will Reiser's intention was to tell a cancer story from a young male's perspective that wasn't chocked full of melodrama and Lifetime channel tropes. It was a lofty goal. Anytime a film focuses on dying there are bound to be cliches employed, because they're essential to every terminally ill storyline. But these guys managed to retain the seriousness of the situation without increasing Kleenex sales. It bluntly addressed the injustice of such a life-altering diagnosis at a young age. It embraced the wave of emotions that overcome a cancer patient (denial, sadness, hopelessness, rage, etc.), but always kept a sense of humor about it. The comedic chemistry between Joseph Gordon Levitt and Anna Kendrick helped in lightening the mood, so that the audience could understand that this was the story of how a man stopped living passively once the option of living started to fade.

Best End to a Saga: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2

There is no other film saga that has been as consistently enjoyable and unforgettable for as long as this saga had to be. My generation grew up with Harry Potter—literally. He gave us a magical world, a magical childhood, and magical love stories. Whether or not this last installment was as amazing as it felt won't be clear for a few years. We're too close to it. We had to say goodbye to a lot of good friends and we're not ready to judge. We're too busy screaming victoriously at Mrs. Weasley's revenge on Bellatrix Lestrange. We're too busy respecting Mrs. Malfoy for defying the Dark Lord in order to save her son. We're too busy cheering on Neville Longbottom for living up to his pre-written destiny (and looking hot while doing it). We're too busy breathing a sigh of relief that Ron and Hermione finally shut up long enough to seal their fates with a kiss. And most of all, we're too busy wondering what life will be like for the next generation, and what evil will darken their days. It's not over. Not yet.

Best Family Drama: Warrior

This isn't a movie about boxing or the burgeoning popularity of MMA fighting. It's about forgiveness and the toll it takes on the soul. Two estranged brothers go head-to-head in the ring for $5 million. Both are fighting for the survival of their own families. But as they fight each beefy meathead with pumped up bravado, there's a bigger fight rumbling inside them. Tommy hates his father for being an abusive drunk and leaving him to care for his dying mother. He hates his big brother Brendan for choosing his dad over them. And he hates himself for being the sole survivor in a friendly-fire incident and not being able to save his best friend. Meanwhile, Brendan hates their father for always favoring Tommy and never having an equal interest in training him. He hates Tommy for never appreciating that attention, for depriving him of his right to say goodbye to his mother, for abandoning him with a drunk, and then for asking him to be his trainer again as if nothing ever happened. And he hates himself for not being able to support his family. With every fight, it appears these men are wading through the hatred, the envy, and the self-loathing towards each other, against the current, so they can finally have it out. They need to forgive each other before they can forgive themselves, because, in the end, the family they're fighting for is each other. Both actors, Tom Hardy and Joel Edgerton, did an amazing job of capturing that tumultuous relationship between two brothers, who were as dependent of each other as they were of their father's approval. A modern day Cain and Abel.

Best Kid's Movie: Super 8

This was J.J. Abram's first original script. I know what you're thinking, Um, wasn't that an E.T. remake? No, no it wasn't. It definitely was inspired by it though, since Abrams worships Steven Spielberg. But this alien makes E.T. look like a chump. He was E.T. if E.T. were giant, pissed off after decades of imprisonment, capable of telepathically communicating, and the owner of a spaceship that dissolved into thousands of cubes as a defense mechanism. There was nothing warm and fuzzy about him—except maybe his insides. The kids were also a bit grittier, interested in zombie films and train crashes, realistic enough to curse, mischievous enough to steal a car and drive without a license, and tough enough to stand up to an alien even after they watched it massacre a bus full of soldiers. It was equal parts coming of age story, where a young boy had to come to terms with what happened to his late mother, and sci-fi action story, where these band of misfits helped save their town.

Best Love Story: Crazy, Stupid, Love.

Relax! I'm not going to gush over how hot Ryan Gosling is. His level of hotness and "photoshopped" abs are not factors in my decision—I swear. This movie rocked because it managed to tell not one but three love stories and interlocked them seamlessly. It did what ensemble romances like New Year's Eve only wished they could do: telling different love stories for every age and stage in a relationship, from puppy love to young love to marriage, without seeming rushed and overproduced. And it didn't just stay in the safe zone of the glamorous side of love. It showed its deterioration, its misdirection, its miscommunication, and its banality. Steve Carrell smartly balanced his goofball humor with moments of devastation and self-loathing. And Jonah Bobo, the kid who played his son, did the same, mastering a shattered expression after every soul-crushing rejection put the kibosh on his dorky desperation. The best part of all though was the way it took its time with each relationship to justify the inevitable professions of love. It wasn't love at first sight or a romance shown over the span of a wordless montage. They showed you the chemistry, the common interests, and the humor. You fell in love with their kind of love.

Best Philosophical Plot: The Adjustment Bureau

This film posed an intriguing question: Would you forfeit your destiny for true love? Many romantic films aspire to present obstacles for their lovebirds and many fail, introducing trite tropes such as stealing your frenemy's fiancee (Something Borrowed), falling in love with a commitment-phobe (No Strings Attached), or basically anything in New Year's Eve. But this film really raised the stakes to an epic romance level, while also maintaining a suspenseful sci-fi mystery.

Best Reboot: Fast Five

Car porn isn't that difficult to produce. Nice cars + hot actors + super fast driving = [insert driving-themed play-on-words title] And considering that this is the 5th installment in the Fast and the Furious franchise, they should pop out as easily as a Duggar baby. By now, they should feel mass produced and overly formulaic, like the American Pie straight-to-DVD film series, yet somehow Vin Diesel and director Justin Lin have managed to keep it fresh. In this film, Dom unites characters from all four previous films and changes the formula—or rather, realigns it. In the first film, when we meet Dom and his original crew, Agent O'Connor infiltrates his ring of fast-driving thieves. But ever since he joined and caused the dissemination of the team, there's only really been fast-driving, shit-talking, and friend-saving. The films have never really been known for their heists—until now. The job they pull in this film has so many twists and turns, it was at an Italian Job-level of awesomeness. And the addition of The Rock to, for once, play a formidable opponent to the similarly beefy Diesel was genius. I finally left the theater wanting to see where they'd race off to next.

Best Rom-Com: Friends with Benefits

Romantic Comedies are for girls. They're constructed to please women. They're a fantastical portrayal of love, life, and especially men. Ninety percent of what happens in a rom-com doesn't happen in real life—or at least not to this generation. This film was like a time capsule of what it's like to be in your late 20s/early 30s in the 00s, trying to succeed professionally, while balancing a demanding family life and a hopeless love life. It reflects this generation's desire for instant gratification, insta-relationships, sexual promiscuity, and grand gestures meant for the world to see. And it did all that with a funny cast equipped with great chemistry.

Best Sequel: Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol

This is not my favorite spy saga. I'm more of a Bond kind of girl. But I have to say, Tom Cruise outdid himself. Oh your action hero runs from fire? HA! Tom Cruise runs from a sandstorm! Top that! At every turn there was an impressive feat to behold, whether it was watching him scale the tallest building in the world with minimal rope and wonky gripping technology, or nearly miss a a ricocheting vehicle hurdling towards him out of a cloud of sand. And he wasn't alone. Jeremy Renner delivered a modernized version of Ethan Hunt's signature hover move. Josh Holloway fearlessly leapt off a building and returned fire mid-air. Paula Patton kicked some major French girl ass. And even Simon Pegg got in a few licks, as well as barbs. The perspective shots were incredible as well. My favorite was from the inside of a car crash. It was an all-around awesome film. Worth a second and third look. You've just got to see him do it all again.

Best Visuals: Immortals
This film was compared heavily to 300, but I'd argue that its visuals were better designed. I don't know if it's because of improvements over time or if it was the cinematographer's choice to increase the vibrancy and glint of gold and black—even the bare skin of the warriors glowed. The Gods were designed like unbreakable figurines. Everything about it was gorgeous: the hordes of battalions, the virgins flight, the Titan battle. All of it—a moving mural.

Best War Movie: Battle Los Angeles

While I realize that this film was marketed as a gritty alien invasion flick, it's actually equal parts war movie. It had the brotherhood, the sacrifice, the civilian rescue missions, and the death-defying feats of bravery. But what really made it fit into the war genre was the final scene where the soldiers choose to redeploy instead of rest. You always hear stories of how there are soldiers in the armed forces who are on their 5th or 6th tour, and most reluctantly, but this film shined a spotlight on the type of soldier that the government wished existed: the unstoppable machine.

Full Disclosure: I have yet to see The Descendants, Shame, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, W.E., Hugo, or My Week with Marilyn.

BEST OF FILM 2011: Best Performances

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The most convincing and memorable performances of the year (in alphabetical order):

Jennifer Aniston as Dr. Julia Harris, D.D.S. in Horrible Bosses

She's not known for racy roles or for being even remotely funny. But she really shocked me with how vulgar she could be. Not because she's a woman, but because she's one of America's sweethearts. She's the girl you fall for not the girl who drugs you, takes provocative photos of you, and molests you in your sleep. It was a major curveball in her career and I hope producers continue to let her step out of our comfort zone.

Melissa McCarthy as Megan in Bridesmaids

From the beginning of this film's promotion, everyone compared it to The Hangover and McCarthy's character to Zach Galifianakis's. Her performance could've continued to be plagued by that comparison all year long. But because the world is not quite accustomed to women behaving like what is stereotypically referred to as "a man," her willingness to put aside her vanity to portray such an unattractive and inappropriate female character was what dissolved that association. She was no longer playing a carbon copy, but an original character.

Meryl Streep as Margaret Thatcher in Iron Lady

It's probably not surprising to anyone that Meryl Streep can deliver an impressive performance. But I swear—I swear—you will completely forget that you are watching Meryl Streep in the first five minutes of this movie. She had the old lady walk, mannerisms, voice, and facial expressions down. Who needs an avatar when you're that good?

Michael Fassbender as Magneto in X-Men

I know. I know. Fassbender has been in far more critically lauded films than this comic book adaptation, but I would venture to state that playing the younger version of a character previously established by another actor isn't an easy feat. Audiences have already accepted one incarnation and might be resistant to a more complex version. Fassbender was presented with the tricky task of making the viewers sympathize with a man they've long perceived as an unforgivable tyrant. He had to show the evolution of a villain, from misunderstood and mistreated to merciless and malevolent. And he had to do it alongside several other origin stories without skimping on emotion.

Paul Giamatti as Barney Panofsky in Barney's Version

In this romantic drama that runs through roughly 30 years of a man's life, we witness the tragedies and trials of his love life. The film illustrates how easily insecurity, self-loathing, and distrust can deteriorate a marriage and a man, and champions the importance of never taking the ones you love for granted. What made it such an enjoyable film though was Giamatti's performance. He ran the gamut of emotions and took the audience on a ride with him.

The Cast of Harry Potter

For 10 years, the main actors of this children's saga have delivered consistently impressive performances despite their age, inexperience, and the challenge of making a story about magic and fictional doom seem as real and imminent as anything in ordinary life. They brought beloved characters to life, did them justice, and did so honorably, never tainting the series with their extracurricular activities or being selfish enough to rob children of their sanctuary with trumped up demands. Each actor, young and old, welcomed us into a fantastical world we'll never forget.

The Cast of Midnight in Paris

You have no idea how incredibly impressive this cast was. I realize that people give Woody Allen a free pass for just about everything, but I swear I'm not just blindly approving of this. He tapped several actors to portray literary greats and their impressions were so good you could hardly believe it. I loved Alison Pill's 1920s Zelda Fitzgerald accent, Tom Hiddleston's devil-may-care F. Scott Fitzgerald, and especially Adrien Brody's Salvador Dalí. He captured the artist's manic and surrealist spirit. I tell you if learning history and literature were this entertaining, no student would miss a class.

The Cast of Super 8

Most child actors skate by on their cuteness, but these characters called for a little mischief, rebellion, and profanity, so that wasn't really an option. The best child actors look like children but behave like adults, and do so without it seeming unnatural. These boys were new to the business but managed to capture adolescent wonder at its best. Elle Fanning, however, was the true highlight. She had to play two characters, the object of Joe's affection and a zombie in his film. There's a scene where she's practicing her zombie stare and movement. She snapped in and out of it so seamlessly, like it was just a switch she flipped in her mind. It was jarring to realize that a 13-year-old could con you so well.

The Cast of The Help

Many have said that Viola Davis is a shoe-in for an Oscar nod, as well as many other award nominations, for this role. I don't disagree that Mrs. Davis delivered a heartbreaking performance of a battered maid, an indentured nanny, and a grieving mother. But she wasn't the only one transforming right before our eyes. This is the first film I actually took notice of Bryce Dallas Howard. The Hollywood legacy has been trying to make a name for herself ever since that 2003 horror dud The Village, but she's surprisingly forgettable. It wasn't until she played this conscienceless racist bitch that she finally stood out. I could say the same about Jessica Chastain, who she's often mistaken for—so many redheads, so little defining roles—because Chastain stepped out of her docile, quiet, background-character comfort zone and played this Marilyn Monroe-esque bombshell besieged by a secret sorrow, and finally took control of the camera. Rounding out the impressive performances in this film is an often overlooked character actor Octavia Spencer. Honestly, I'm not surprised she could pull this off. The only reason I'm mentioning her—well, if you saw the film, you know why I'm mentioning her. Anyone on Earth who has ever been made to feel less than themselves wishes they could be so bold as to deliver such a devastating blow to their enemy as her character did. We thank her simply for the spectacle.

The Breakout Stars of 2011

2012-01-15T11:55:00.002-05:00

Adam Pally

Breakout Role: An unemployed slacker on "Happy Endings"
Why: Many may know Pally as the fat guy on that surprise-hit ABC series, but I think of him as the only reason that mid-season comedy wasn't cancelled. The Jersey native got his start in the infamous Upright Citizens Brigade and mastered improv to later become quite the scene-stealer. He has the potential to reach Zach Galifianakis- slash Charlie Day-levels of stardom with the right starring vehicles. Much like Galifianakis, he has no boundaries when it comes to comedy. He regularly posts Funny or Die videos, including a nerve-wracking series of interviews with celebrities called "Riding Shotgun with Adam Pally," and he has no filter on Twitter, where he actually live-tweeted the experience of flying with Tim Robbins and being his wingman as he macked on two girls half his age, despite the fact that Pally is married.
What's Next: Bit parts in the comedies Frankie Go Boom with Charlie Hunnam ("Sons of Anarchy"), Ron Perlman, Lizzy Caplan ("Party Down"), and Whitney Cummings ("Whitney"), and The To Do List with a slew of comedic actors, including Bill Hader ("SNL"), Andy Samberg, Aubrey Plaza ("Parks and Recreation"), Donald Glover ("Community"), and many more.

Charlie Day

Breakout Role: A sexually harassed dental assistant in Horrible Bosses
Why: Fans of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" already knew back in '05 that Daly was one-to-watch. The rest of the planet caught up with that realization when they saw him get violated by Jennifer Aniston and accidentally inhale coke this summer. When he spazzes out at the slightest sign of inappropriate behavior, his eyes bulge and he turns into a panic-ridden clutz with Bobcat Goldthwait's less-guttural voice. He's a sight to be seen and heard.
What's Next: He'll be in Guillermo Del Toro's sci-fi action film Pacific Rim with Charlie Hunnam, Ron Perlman, and Idris Elba, no doubt as the comic relief.

Felicity Jones

Breakout Role: A lovesick girl in Like Crazy
Why: I think it's safe to say that Felicity Jones has replaced Carey Mulligan as the new British It Girl. The 28-year-old actress's first starring role in an American film swept the indie festival circuit this year, picking up 8 awards, including the Grand Jury Prize and Special Jury Prize for direction and acting at Sundance. There's a little-known story going around that she submitted a video of her showering as her audition for a particular emotional scene in the film. It was a ballsy and unexpected move, which was a characteristic that was necessary for the role itself, since the director and co-writer Drake Doremus encouraged his lead actors to improvise many of the scenes and shot many of them with hidden cameras. Jones now has the rep for being game for anything and having the flexibility required to become an amazing actress.
What's Next: She'll be teaming up with Doremus again for another drama starring Guy Pearce and Amy Ryan (Gone Baby Gone and "The Office"), and then filming Ralph Fiennes' adaptation of The Invisible Woman, where she'll play Charles Dickens' secret mistress.

Gugu Mbatha-Raw

Breakout Role: A spy on "Undercovers"
Why: I realize that not only was her series canceled, but her first feature film, Larry Crowne, wasn't exactly critic-approved, but it's been a long time since there's been a worthy new female addition to the African American acting league. So long in fact that we're making an exception and inducting this 28-year-old South African Brit. Why wouldn't we brake the rules? She's gorgeous. She can do romance, light comedy, and action. She's perfect. Now all she needs is a better agent.
What's Next: The mystery thriller Odd Thomas, starring Anton Yelchin, Patton Oswalt, and Willem Dafoe, and the new supernatural series "Touch" with Keifer Sutherland.

Henry Cavill

Breakout Role: Clark Kent/Superman in Man of Steel
Why: Ok granted, we haven't actually seen Cavill in his breakout role, and technically playing Theseus in this year's Immortals would probably better qualify. But let's be honest, the only reason he's on our radar is because he's going to be the next Superman. He's going to try his very best to erase Bryan Singer's incarnation—that poor unsuspecting newbie Brandon Routh was coerced into starring in—from our memory. And with any luck he'll replace it with a better performance instead of an even worse one. So far so good. He's got the hair. He's got the piercing eyes. And he's got the carved physique. Now all he needs is a convincing American accent, an awesome villain, and millions of dollars worth of impressive special effects.
What's Next (Besides Superman): The action thriller The Cold Light of Day with Bruce Willis and Sigourney Weaver.

Jane Levy

Breakout Role: A city girl on "Suburgatory"
Why: Levy's first role ever was actually on Showtime's "Shameless." She played this dumb, skanky girl who agreed to be a beard for her gay classmate. She had heavy eyeliner, lots of gel in her hair, and wore provocative clothing. It was the complete opposite of the starring role she has now as the smart, snarky, anti-suburbs New Yorker who doesn't care what she looks like and refuses to conform. She's like all the good parts of Angela from "My So Called Life" and "Daria" mixed into one rebellious teenage girl. Levy's versatility will surely come in handy in the future.
What's Next: The drama Nobody Walks with Dylan McDermott, John Krasinski, Rosemarie DeWitt, and Olivia Thirlby, and the comedy Fun Size with Victoria Justice, Johnny Knoxville, Chelsea Handler, and Thomas McDonell (Prom).

Jennifer Aniston

Breakout Role: A nympho dentist in Horrible Bosses
Why: I know how old Jennifer Aniston is (42) and I know how long she's been in this business (23). I'm not delusional. I realize she got her big break in 1993's Leprechaun (ha!) and an even bigger one on "Friends," but we've never really thought of Aniston as an actress. She was either Brad Pitt's wife, Brad Pitt's ex-wife, Vince Vaughn's girlfriend, John Mayer's girlfriend, Justin Theroux's girlfriend, or that chick from "Friends," who maintains a sick body and keeps doing lame rom-coms. It wasn't until we all saw her try to molest a guy wearing, a majority of the time, practically nothing, performing lewd acts, and delivering profane lines that we realized that maybe, just maybe, she can actually act. I even liked her in this year's Just Go With It. I'm amazed by how she managed to develop chemistry with Adam Sandler...the guy who dressed up as a chick and played his Al-Pacino-romancing twin sister this year. That guy! Honestly, I think she deserves an honorable-mention Oscar just for the effort alone.
What's Next: The comedy Wanderlust with Paul Rudd.

Jessica Chastain

Breakout Role: An assassin in The Debt, a mother and wife in The Tree of Life, and an infertile housewife in The Help
Why: Chastain has been secretly snagging choice roles all year, proving she can play an assassin, doting mother, and a misunderstood housewife. I only had the pleasure of seeing her in The Help, but it was enough to co-sign her debut. She transformed from these docile women that she was known for into this dense blonde bombshell. She was practically unrecognizable. I look forward to seeing what she transforms into next.
What's Next: The C.K. Williams biography Tar with James Franco, Michelle Williams, and Mila Kunis; the horror Mama with Nikolaj Coster-Waldau ("Game of Thrones"); the untitled Terrence Malick romantic drama with Ben Affleck, Javier Bardem, Rachel McAdams and Rachel Weisz; the crime drama Wettest County with Tom Hardy, Shia Labeouf, Mia Wasikowska, and Guy Pearce; and the sci-fi action film Horizons with Tom Cruise.

Jonah Hill

Breakout Role: A statistician in Moneyball and a reluctant babysitter in The Sitter
Why: The 28-year-old Judd Apatow protege made a play for the big leagues this year, dropping half his body weight, co-starring in a big budget sports drama with Brad Pitt, and co-creating his own animated FOX series, "Allen Gregory." Every year one of Apatow's boys kicks some Hollywood ass. 2007 was Seth Rogen's year with Knocked Up. 2008 was Jason Segel's year with Forgetting Sarah Marshall. And this year was finally Hill's turn. But this is only the beginning...
What's Next: Next year, his first writing credit will hit theaters when he partners up with Channing Tatum for the revival of the action comedy 21 Jump Street; then he'll costar with Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn in the comedy Neighborhood Watch; then he'll costar with Mark Wahlberg in the action comedy Good Time Gang; then he'll reteam with his buddies James Franco, Seth Rogen, Danny McBride, and Jay Baruchel in the action comedy in The Apocalypse; and then he'll reprise his role in the animated sequel How to Train Your Dragon 2.

Kristen Wiig

Breakout Role: A super religious shut-in in Paul and a bankrupt baker and maid-of-honor in Bridesmaids
Why: Every "SNL" generation has a few stars who eventually breakout on their own. Andy Samberg tried in '07 with Hot Rod and Will Forte tried with MacGruber in '10, but neither had any luck. They seem presently destined for cameos and supporting roles. But after building up her resume with the help of a few "SNL" and comedy friends, she developed street cred for being up for anything. She's not just a chick in a film. She's a comedian. She revived the women-can-be-funny-too belief when she co-wrote Bridesmaids and bucked every girly stereotype comedies usually brand women with.
What's Next: The comedy Imogene with Annette Bening, Mat Dillon, and Darren Criss; the dramedy Revenge for Jolly! with Elijah Wood, Ryan Phillippe, and Oscar Isaac; the horror comedy Freezing People is Easy with Owen Wilson and Paul Rudd; the Sean Penn-directed comedy The Comedian with Robert De Niro; and the animated sequel How to Train Your Dragon 2.

Mamie Gummer

Breakout Role: A type-A doctor in "Off the Map"
Why: Meryl Streep's daughter has actually done a few films in the last five years, but her official debut was in a short-lived adventure medical drama. For 60 minutes every week, we forgot she was Hollywood royalty or had such a hard act to follow, and managed to enjoy her curt comedic deadpan delivery without being distracted.
What's Next: The comedy He's Way More Famous Than You.

Matthew McConaughey
Breakout Role: A sleazy defense attorney in Lincoln Lawyer
Why: In '99, McConaughey made his first big splash with the comedy Edtv. But once the ladies discovered how dreamy he was in 2001's The Wedding Planner, he became the romantic comedy love interest. It didn't matter that between rom-coms he filmed the adventure film Sahara or the dramatic thriller Two for the Money, or the sports drama We Are Marshall. He was just a topless six-pack with a charming Southern accent and a bohemian lifestyle. It wasn't until he starred in a crime drama adaptation where he got in touch with his inner dirtbag that everyone realized that maybe the 42-year-old actor could do more than glisten.
What's Next: The thriller The Paperboy with Nicole Kidman and Zac Efron; the stripper comedy Magic Mike with Channing Tatum; the drama Mud with Reese Witherspoon; and the war drama Thunder Run with Gerard Butler and Sam Worthington.

Max Greenfield

Breakout Role: The neurotic poser on "New Girl"
Why: It's tough being the comic relief on a serious series, but it's even tougher on a comedic series. Everyone's being funny. Everyone's got their own one-liners. And everyone's got their own schtick. It's hard to standout. But Greenfield infuses Schmidt with just enough douchey, self-conscious, over-eager desperation to be funny without being annoying. It's a delicate balance, and after more than 10 years of bopping around television, he's finally found his groove.
What's Next: The second half of the first season of "New Girl."

Melissa McCarthy

Breakout Role: The tough-yet-promiscuous government agent in Bridesmaids
Why: When I first saw McCarthy in "Gilmore Girls," she played this klutzy, lovable goofball with the energy of a hyper squirrel. And once the series was over, she was one of many characters that viewers would never forget. But I found it hard to pinpoint where exactly McCarthy (or any of the show's quirky actors) would be able to revive her career. Then she found another role as the goofy sidekick on Christina Applegate's comedy "Samantha Who?" Unfortunately, after two seasons it was canceled too. But that turned out to be more of a blessing than a setback. A year later, she scored the lead role in "Mike & Molly," a romantic comedy series on CBS. And shortly after, the series became a hit. Not content to rest on her laurels, McCarthy continued her pursuit of comedic roles, extending to film. Having proven to have a knack for character-driven bit parts, like the single-mother support group leader in The Backup Plan and the demanding wife in Life As We Know It, it's not shocking that she could conjure up yet another scene-stealing character as a bridesmaid. Going nude—as in sans makeup—dressing butch, and shamelessly coming on to a man she just met was bold, unexpected, and fearless. It's why she won an Emmy. And it's why she's no longer "that fat girl" but "that funny chick."
What's Next: The Judd Apatow comedy This is 40, starring Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Seth Rogen, and Megan Fox.

Michael Fassbender

Breakout Role: The dashing Mr. Rochester in Jane Eyre, Magneto in X-Men: First Class, the infamous psychiatrist Carl Jung in A Dangerous Method, and a sex addict in Shame
Why: The 34-year-old Brit has been building up to this moment for the last ten years. In '06, he did 300. In '09, he did Inglorious Basterds. But this year, he went all out with back-to-back films, impressing critics and audiences with powerful performances of troubled men with challenging, life-altering decisions.
What's Next: The sci-fi horror Prometheus with Noomi Rapace, Charlize Theron, Guy Pearce, Idris Elba, and Patrick Wilson, and the drama Twelve Years a Slave with Brad Pitt and Chiwetel Ejiofor.

Naya Rivera

Breakout Role: The sharp-tongue cheerleader on "Glee"
Why: While it's true that Rivera has been on "Glee" from the start, it hasn't really felt like she's been apart of the series until this season, when her character finally came out of the closet and addressed the reasons behind her mean spirit. Best of all though is the discovery that she has some pipes on her too, and deserves just as many solos and duets as the rest of the usual lead vocals. Her Amy Winehouse and Adele tributes were rather impressive for a supporting actor. It's a wonder why she's been kept in the background all this time.
What's Next: Next year on "Glee" we're going to meet Santana's mother, played by Gloria Estefan, and she'll get a role model played by Ricki Martin.

Oscar Isaac

Breakout Role: As the abusive orderly slash pimp in Sucker Punch and the ex-con husband in Drive
Why: Isaac doesn't really have a rep for playing likable people, but he was honestly the only shining star in that painfully depressing comic book adaptation that promised badass sword-wielding mavens and delivered damaged and sexually abused orphans/runaways. Sure he played a sadistic sociopath, but he just did it so convincingly, you didn't want to take your eyes off of him.
What's Next: The dramedy Revenge for Jolly! with Elijah Wood, Ryan Phillippe, and Kristin Wiig; the drama Learning to Fly with Viola Davis, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and Holly Hunter; The Bourne Legacy quasi-spinoff starring Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, and Edward Norton; the Coen Brothers drama Inside Llewyn Davis with Carey Mulligan and Justin Timberlake; and the crime thriller The Jesuit with Paz Vega.

BEST OF FILM 2011: Best Posters

2012-01-13T00:10:00.000-05:00

These are the most creatively designed film posters of the year:
*Click on the them to see the detail.

TV: 2012 Mid-Season Premieres, Return Schedule, and Spoilers Galore!

2012-01-10T02:16:00.007-05:00

This time around I'm only posting new shows and shows I think you should watch:

MONDAY, JANUARY 2

8pm "Pretty Little Liars" (ABC Family)
Spoilers: Shane Coffey ("Secret Life of the American Teenager") will join the series to complicate Aria's romantic life. He "was traveling abroad and he kind of comes back in Aria’s life and provides her with a very important service." Maya returns and she and Emily rekindle their relationship, but Maya isn't the same girl she used to be. Caleb returns, sparking a love triangle involving Hanna and Lucas. Oddly enough though when Lucas goes missing, Caleb is the one who's more eager to find him, while the girls are eager to use him to hack his way to the identity of A. We'll meet yet another character (played by Aussie actor Lachlan Buchanan) who might know something about Alison's death. And in March 19th's finale, titled "UnmAsked," A will be revealed. dum-Dum-DUM!!

8pm "How I Met Your Mother" (CBS)
Spoilers: Becki Newton ("Ugly Betty") will be joining the series as a recurring love interest for Barney, basically playing "the female Barney." Also, Barney will learn that Robyn can't have kids, and "her secret will be key to what happens in the remaining 12 episodes of the season. It’s an important pivot point for the season." And for some unknown reason, Ted's ex Victoria will return again.

8:30pm "2 Broke Girls" (CBS)
Spoilers: I don't believe Johnny will be back for a while, since Nick Zano will be on "90210" for the rest of its season.

9pm "The Lying Game" (ABC Family)
Spoilers: Charisma Carpenter joins the series as Char's aunt and a thorn in Alec and Ted's side.

10pm "Hawaii Five-O" (CBS)

TUESDAY, JANUARY 3

8pm "Switched at Birth" (ABC Family)

Spoilers: There will be a love square involving Emmett, Bay, Daphne, and Wilke. Emmett and Bay's relationship will continue to be tested heavily as both his mother and her real grandmother Melody act openly against it. Emmett will be caught between his parents during their divorce, and somehow Bay gets involved. Daphne becomes friends with Bay's ex-best friend Simone. Toby and Wilke start selling fake ID's. We'll get to meet Daphne's real grandmother, who'll no longer acknowledge Bay as her granddaughter, and will even have trouble with her being Latina. Meanwhile, Daphne will come to terms with the fact that she's not Latina. (Although how the fair-skinned redhead ever thought she was is beyond me.) Kathryn is approached to write a book about their situation. And the family discovers that their lawyer has put their lawsuit in jeopardy.

8:30pm "Work It" (ABC)

Plot: Two unemployed car salesmen realize they are living in a woman's world, so they decide that to find work again they must dress as women to get jobs as pharmaceutical reps. By doing so, it makes them better men, husbands and fathers, but also makes them appreciate the sanctuary of their nights at the bar where they can be themselves.

Cast: Ben Koldyke ("How I Met Your Mother"), Amaury Nolasco ("Prison Break"), Beth Lacke, comedian John Caparulo, Rebecca Mader ("No Ordinary Family" and "Lost"), Rochelle Aytes ("Detroit 1-8-7"), Kate Reinders ("Sherri"), Kirstin Eggers, Hannah Sullivan

Verdict: It's mildy entertaining, but if you want to watch two guys suffer like women do for once, then you'll probably be satisfied.

9pm "Jane By Design" (ABC Family)
Plot: Jane Quimby is a 16-year-old high school outsider (Dasher) who lives a double life as a 20-something design assistant in the corporate world, so she can help her big brother (Rogers) pay the bills and live out her dream to become a fashion designer.
Cast: Erica Dasher, Nick Roux (Lemonade Mouth), Andie MacDowell, David Clayton Rogers (Revenge of the Bridesmaids), India de Beaufort ("One Tree Hill"), Rowly Dennis, Meagan Tandy, Matthew Atkinson, Smith Cho ("100 Questions")
Verdict: Jane is like a clutzy fashion geek that's easy to relate to. Her bff Billy and big brother Ben are hot, but I'm a little iffy on her cookie-cutter crush Nick and her too-old, not-hot-enough-to-skate-on-his-accent co-worker Jeremy. I guess because I already see sparks of her bff being in love with her, so I'm way more interested in that. Her enemies, Lulu and India, are sufficiently bitchy enough to pose an entertaining threat. And I'm liking the potential of Ben falling for her guidance counselor Rita, who's obviously had a crush on him since they were in high school together. Bottom line: If you like fashion and awkward high school experiences, you're going to love this.

10pm "Parenthood" (ABC)
Spoilers: Crosby falls for "a bright, accomplished, wry-witted cello player (Courtney Ford from "Dexter" and "True Blood") who just so happens to be renting space at the recording studio." Max finally makes a friend. Amber struggles in a new job. Sarah becomes overwhelmed with thoughts of having a baby. Julia and Joel try to resist interfering in Zoe's personal life, and Julia starts to worry about the chance of Zoe wanting to keep her baby. Zeek hears some striking news from his doctor. And Adam and Kristina realize that the cost of college will be an extra struggle for the family's economy.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 4

8:30pm "Suburgatory" (ABC)

Spoilers: Robin Givens will guest star as Dallas's longtime rival. Alicia Silverstone will reunite with her Clueless castmate Jeremy Sisto when she joins the series as a potential love interest, whose unusual line of work causes a rift between George and his BFF Noah. Meanwhile, Tessa and Dalia go after the same guy (Thomas McDonell from Prom).

9pm "Modern Family" (ABC)
Spoilers: Ellen Barkin guest stars as Vera, a very tough, legendary real estate broker who becomes Phil's main nemesis; Greg Kinnear joins as Phil's new business partner; and Bobby Cannavale guest stars as Louis, the former clown partner of Cam's alter ego Fizbo.

9:30pm "Happy Endings" (ABC)
Spoilers: Not only will Penny and Dave start to consider each other romantically, but so will their parents when we meet Dave's dad for the first time and his new girlfriend, who turns out to be Penny's mom. Brad rebels against Jane's controlling ways. And Max might finally get a boyfriend this Valentine's Day.

10pm "Revenge" (ABC)
Spoilers: Daniel proposes before the month is up. Jack finally lets his guard down with Amanda only to be put-off when she kisses a female patron, and a stunning revelation is unveiled and becomes a game changer for Emily and the Graysons. Something terrible will happen that'll force Emily and Victoria to become allies, and some very surprising things about Victoria’s origins will be revealed.

THURSDAY, JANUARY 5

8pm "Vampire Diaries" (The CW)

Spoilers: Caroline will celebrate her 18th birthday and come to terms with her breakup with Tyler, and what Klaus's siring him means for their relationship.

9pm "Grey's Anatomy" (ABC)
Spoilers: Teddy questions Cristina about what exactly happened to Henry in the surgery, and their argument somehow snowballs into the dormant resentment he has for her for aborting their child. Ben asks Bailey to move in with him. In February, "Meredith imagines what life would’ve been like had her late mother Ellis never had Alzheimer’s, a traumatic situation that shaped Mer into the dark-and-twisty wife and MD she is today." Richard would've married Ellis, and Meredith never would've met Derek or become bestfriends with Christina. Kate Walsh will reprise her role as Derek's ex-wife, because in this reality, they never got divorced. And a victim of the massacre will return too. Everyone's life will be different. (Although I highly doubt that George, Izzie, or Burke will pop up.)

9pm "The Secret Circle" (The CW)
Spoilers: Faye will get caught up with a self-proclaimed voodoo priest (Grey Damon from "Friday Night Lights" and "The Nine Lives of Chloe King") who promises to enhance her power by leeching the power from the circle. Lauren Stamile ("Burn Notice" and "Grey's Anatomy") will have a recurring role as a psychic with ties to Cassie's parents. It turns out Cassie isn't the only Blackwell offspring imbued with black magic, but it'll be a while before the other circle member who is is revealed. (My money's on Diana.) Fans of witch-hunter Jake will be happy to know that he's been upgraded to series regular, so we'll be seeing more of him, but don't think that means he'll have Cassie all to himself. Adam will stop fighting his "destiny" and finally make a play for her. And Adam's dad is finally going to put down the bottle and start protecting his son, becoming a formidable opponent for Charles and Dawn.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 8

8pm "Once Upon a Time" (ABC)
Spoilers: We'll learn that Rumplestiltskin was actually on a quest to find power in order to prevent a war and save his son. We'll see a flashback of when Snow White had to endure the possibility of her Prince Charming marrying another, and we'll meet the seven dwarves. And we'll finally get to see the story of Red Riding Hood.

9pm "The Good Wife" (CBS)

9pm "The Firm" (NBC)
Plot: Based on the best-selling novel by John Grisham, The Firm is a new drama that continues the story of attorney Mitchell McDeere (Lucas) who, as a young associate 10 years earlier, had brought down the prestigious Memphis law firm of Bendini, Lambert & Locke, which had been operating as a front for the Chicago mob. After a difficult decade, which included a stay in the Federal Witness Protection Program, McDeere and his family now emerge from isolation to reclaim their lives and their future—only to find that past dangers are still lurking and new threats are everywhere.
Cast: Josh Lucas (Sweet Home Alabama), Molly Parker ("Swingtown" and "Deadwood"), Callum Keith Rennie ("The Killing" and "Battlestar Galactica"), Juliette Lewis, Natasha Calis, Tricia Helfer ("Battlestar Galactica"), and Shaun Majumder ("Detroit 1-8-7")
Verdict: It's not as exciting as the commercials make it seem. It's like a law series with an intricate conspiracy that's supposed to slowly unfold throughout the season. If you don't get hooked on the first two hours though, chances are it's not going to get any better for you.

9pm "Shameless" (SHOWTIME)
Spoilers: Fiona will take permanent residence in rebound city as she tries to get over Steve. Some of the contenders include an investment executive (James Wolk from "Lone Star") who's supposedly a Steve doppleganger, and an old and now-married crush (Taylor Kinney from "Vampire Diaries" aka Lady Gaga's alleged boyfriend) of hers from high school with whom she reconnects with. Zach McGowan joins the series as Karen's new "friend" Jody, who poses as competition for Lip. And Ian will get a new boyfriend in the form of a 50something married man.

10pm "House of Lies" (SHOWTIME)
Plot: A subversive, scathing look at a self-loathing management consultant (Cheadle) from a top-tier firm. Marty, a highly successful, cutthroat consultant is never above using any means (or anyone) necessary to get his clients the information they want.
Cast: Don Cheadle, Kristen Bell, Ben Schwartz ("Undercovers" and "Parks and Recreation"), Josh Lawson, Dawn Olivieri ("The Vampire Diaries" and "Heroes"), Donis Leonard Jr., Glynn Turman, Greg Germann ("Ally McBeal"), Anna Camp ("The Good Wife" and "True Blood"), John Aylward, Richard Schiff
Verdict: It has the self-important bravado of "Suits" and the instructional breaking-of-the-fourth-wall that "Burn Notice" employs, with the douchiness, profanity, and lewdness of "Entourage." Basically, it's a dude's show. The moments where everything freezes except him, so he can explain a business term, were a little annoying at first, but once you soak in his genius it gets a lot more bearable. I thought the "smart" stripper (Megalyn Echikunwoke) would be the dealbreaker, but I think I'm a little more concerned by his openly gay son who wears pink and purple, and demands the lead female roles in school musicals. I love gay people, but why does that have to be in this particular show? His tolerance and encouragement is in no way endearing him to us as a father. At the very least, it just makes us hate his ex-wife more for being the selfish, openly-negligent skank bag that she is. Honestly though, I'll probably just watch for the return of Bell to TV, Schwartz's third shot at being a series regular, and for however long Echikunwoke remains interesting on the show.

MONDAY, JANUARY 9

10pm "Castle" (ABC)
Spoilers: Not only will Hilarie Burton ("One Tree Hill"), Justin Hartley ("Smallville"), Jennifer Beals ("The Chicago Code" and "The L Word"), and Josh Stamberg ("Drop Dead Diva") guest star this season, but there will also be a 1940s-set noir episode.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 11

8pm "Whitney" (NBC)
Spoilers: Kathy Griffin will guest star as Roxanne's co-worker, and John Cleese will play a couples therapist.

8:30pm "Are You There, Chelsea?" (NBC)
Plot: A comedy about a 20-something woman (Prepon) based loosely on the outrageous number one best-selling book by Chelsea Handler.
Cast: Laura Prepon ("That 70s Show" and "October Road"), Chelsea Handler, Jake McDorman ("Greek"), Lauren Lapkus, Lenny Clarke, Ali Wong, Mark Povinelli
Verdict: It all depends on how much you love Handler and how much you're willing to see her humor be diluted for network television, a la "Whitney."

THURSDAY, JANUARY 12

8pm "Big Bang Theory" (CBS)
Spoilers: Sheldon finds himself in hot water when he doesn't appreciate Amy's recent accomplishment. And Howard tries to get Bernadette to change her opinion about having children.

8pm "30 Rock" (NBC)
Spoilers: Liz gets a new boyfriend and seeks Jack's approval. Jenna has new fame as a judge on "America's Kidz Got Singing." Tracy is caught on a cellphone video saying offensive things. And Kenneth prepares for the Rapture. Naturally.

8pm "Bones" (FOX)
Spoilers: Rumor has it that Brennan might go into labor in a prison.

8:30pm "Rob" (CBS)

Plot: A solitary guy, Rob, marries into a huge Mexican-American family.

Cast: Rob Schneider, Claudia Bassols, Cheech Marin, Diana Maria Riva (Our Family Wedding), Eugenio Derbez, Lupe Ontiveros ("Desperate Housewives"), Ricky Rico

Verdict: There's a fine line between pointing out cultural differences and being racist, so if you want to see if Schneider crosses it, you should tune in.

8:30pm "Parks and Recreation" (NBC)
Spoilers: Paul Rudd will play Leslie Nope's opposing candidate! Kathryn Hahn ("Free Agent") will join the series for a multi-episode arc as his campaign manager. Because Leslie will be out campaigning, she'll hire someone to pick up the slack at her office, and we'll get to see some funny interviews led by Chris and Ron. Louis C.K. will return to reprise his role as Leslie's ex Dave and pose some competition for Adam. And Leslie will be Ann's Cupid this Valentine's Day.

9pm "Person of Interest" (CBS)
Spoilers: Carter will start to become more apart of their investigations.

9pm "The Office" (NBC)
Spoilers: Dwight will try to find a new job within the company, and Erin will start to flirt with him to make Andy jealous.

9pm "The Finder" (FOX)

Plot: A quirky, one-hour procedural centering on a remarkable man (Stults) with an eccentric personality and a unique gift to help others recover what they've lost.

Cast: Geoff Stults ("October Road" and "Happy Town"), Michael Clarke Duncan, Mercedes Masohn, Maddie Hasson

Verdict: The sneak peek episode that aired last year wasn't that impressive, but they've changed up the cast, cut one chick and added two more. One's a Deputy US Marshall (Masohn) who's his friend-with-benefits and the other is a thieving runaway (Hasson), so hopefully they'll spice things up more. But the novelty of him always finding things and people will probably start to get stale after a few episodes, so unless they introduce an ongoing case or a real love story, I doubt it'll last long. Shows like these belong in the summer, on the USA Network.

9:30pm "Up All Night" (NBC)
Spoilers: Dean Winters ("30 Rock") will guest star as Chris's super competitive brother, and Alanis Morissette will play a hip-hop legend from Ava's '90s band, Sound LLC.

10pm "The Mentalist" (CBS)

FRIDAY, JANUARY 13
9pm "Grimm" (NBC)
Spoilers: The creatures will start to question Eddie's loyalty given his allegiance to a grimm. And we'll be learning a lot more about Nick's parents and some new details about Aunt Marie's past.

9pm "Fringe" (FOX)
Spoilers: While Olivia and Lincoln try to help Peter return to his world, they try to cope with the looming threat of the transparent shapeshifters. And the Fringe Division from the Other Side must deal with both a visit from Peter and a new enemy.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 14
9pm "Terra Nova" (FOX)

SUNDAY, JANUARY 15

8:30pm & 9:30pm "Napoleon Dynamite" (FOX)

Plot: Follows the misadventures of an awkward high school teenager and his quirky friends as they struggle to navigate life in rural Idaho.

Cast: The Cast of the movie Napoleon Dynamite: Jon Heder, Aaron Ruell, Efren Ramirez, Tina Majorino, Sandy Martin, Jon Gries, Diedrich Bader, Haylie Duff

Verdict: Um, if you liked the movie...

MONDAY, JANUARY 16
8pm "Alcatraz" (FOX)

Plot: A thrilling new series that follows a unique trio investigating the mystifying reappearance of 302 of Alcatraz's most notorious prisoners and guards, 50 years after they vanished.

Cast: Sarah Jones ("Sons of Anarchy" and "Big Love"), Jeffrey Pierce ("The Nine"), Sam Neill (Jurassic Park), Robert Forster ("Heroes"), Jorge Garcia ("Lost"), Parminder Nagra (Bend It Like Beckham and "ER"), Jonny Coyne, Jason Butler Harner, David Hoflin, Joe Egender

Verdict: It could be an intriguing police procedural given the supernatural twist. I look forward to seeing where the conspiracy leads.

8pm "Gossip Girl" (The CW)

Spoilers: Rumor has it that Blair goes through with the wedding, because there have been scenes shot at a reception. Chuck appears to make a full recovery, since he attends the wedding. And Louis, being the sadistic fool that he is, asks Dan to ghost-write his vows for him, and of course Dan takes that opportunity to profess his undying love to Blair without her realizing it.

9pm "Being Human" (Syfy)

10pm "Lost Girl" (Syfy)

Plot: It's about a Succubus who feeds on the sexual energy of humans. Growing up with human parents, Bo (Silk) had no reason to believe she was anything other than the girl next door, until she drained her boyfriend to death in their first sexual encounter. Now, she has hit the road alone and afraid. She discovers she is one of the Fae, creatures of legend and folklore, who pass as humans while feeding off them secretly and in different ways, as they have for millennia. Relieved to find out that she is not alone, yet horrified, Bo decides to take the middle path between the humans and the Fae while embarking on a personal mission to unlock the secrets of her origin.

Cast: Anna Silk, Ksenia Solo ("Life Unexpected"), Kris Holden-Ried ("The Tudors"), Zoie Palmer, Rick Howland, K.C. Collins, Emmanuelle Vaugier ("Two and a Half Men" and "Covert Affairs"), Cle Bennett ("Flashpoint"), Vincent Walsh, Athena Karkanis

Verdict: It looks pretty corny, but if you're a supernatural fiend, then you might want to give it a try.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 17
8pm "Glee" (FOX)
Spoilers: Will proposes to Emma. Sam gets Greased to woo Mercedes. Gloria Estefan will play Santana's mom and rapper Pitbull will play her brother. And Ricky Martin guest stars as a Spanish teacher. We'll finally meet Rachel's gay dads. And there will be a Michael Jackson-themed episode.

8pm "90210" (The CW)
Spoilers: Annie will meet yet another rich playboy in the form of Nick Zano ("2 Broke Girls" and "Melrose Place"). Jen will return with her baby. Adrianna will be back to her old ways when she kidnaps someone. (Probably her daughter.) Rumor has it that they'll be referencing storylines from Season 1 and resolving them. Perhaps that explains why rumors are also saying that the girl who hit Liam on his bike has a juicy identity.

9pm "New Girl" (FOX)
Spoilers: Jess will get a few new love interests in the form of Ryan Kwanten ("True Blood"), who'll play a potential Valentine's Day one-night stand who is super dull and still lives with his ex, and Dermot Mulroney (Wedding Date), who'll play the parent of one of her students that she clashes with. Lizzy Caplan ("Party Down") will guest star as a highly educated woman with a degree in art history that Nick meets at an art gallery and is instantly smitten-yet-intimidated by. When Nick invites her to Schmidt’s birthday party, he worries that she'll be put off by his roomies, "yet it may be someone else who's in for the bigger awakening." Clark Duke ("Greek") guest stars as Caplan's intern who ends up becoming buddies with Nick who inspires him to give up on his dreams of becoming a lawyer. Winston will also get some loving when Kali Hawk (Couples Retreat) joins the series for a multi-episode arc as his old flame Shelby. June Diane Raphael (Bride Wars) will play Jess’ smart and "slightly intimidating lesbian doctor friend who offers an ailing (and health insurance-less) Nick anc unofficial diagnosis." And Rachael Harris (The Hangover and "Notes from the Underbelly") will play the principal of Jess's school.

9:30pm "Raising Hope" (FOX)
Spoilers: After realizing that Hope might be the smartest one in the family, they decide to get their GEDs.

10pm "White Collar" (USA)
Spoilers: Because of Elizabeth's kidnapping, Neal is forced to confess his betrayal to Peter. And Neal will get some news that could mean big changes for his working relationship with Peter.

10pm "Justified" (FX)
Spoilers: Jere Burns ("Burn Notice") and Neal McDonough ("Desperate Housewives") will team up to play oxycontin peddlers. Desmond Harrington ("Dexter" and "Gossip Girl") guest stars on the premiere as someone with ties to their new drug cartel. And at the beginning of the season, there will be an episode where "Boyd is desperately trying to stay in prison and Raylan is desperately trying to get him out."

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 18
10pm "Royal Pains" (USA)
Spoilers: JoAnna Garcia ("Better With You") joins the series as a young doc with a secret child star past. And Molly Sims ("Las Vegas") guest stars in the finale.

THURSDAY, JANUARY 22
9pm "Prime Suspect" - back-to-back episodes

MONDAY, JANUARY 23
9pm "Hart of Dixie" (The CW)
Spoilers: Lavon's parents visit, and George reveals his plan to elope, which is waylaid by a snowstorm. Wade will suffer a misstep with Zoe when she discovers he started a betting pool on her love life. And we'll meet Zoe's step dad, played by Gary Cole ("The Good Wife"), who she'll see for the first time in three years. She won't have a chance to lay into him about concealing her paternity though because he's come to ask her to join him in a surgery taking place nearby.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 25

9pm "Touch" (FOX)

Plot: A father discovers his autistic, mute son can actually predict events before they happen.

Cast: Kiefer Sutherland ("24"), David Mazouz, Danny Glover, Gugu Mbatha-Raw ("Undercovers" and Larry Crowne), Roxanna Bruso, Karen David

Verdict: It's like "Numbers" meets "FlashForward"—very prophetic, nerdy, and Lifetime-channel heartwarming.

FRIDAY, JANUARY 27
8pm "Chuck" (NBC) - Series Finale

SUNDAY, JANUARY 29

9pm "Luck" (HBO)

Plot: The plot follows a number of characters who frequent the same horse-racing track, and the organized crime that runs the sport.

Cast: Dustin Hoffman, Dennis Farina (Snatch), John Ortiz (Fast & Furious), Richard Kind ("Spin City"), Weronika Rosati, Kevin Dunn (Transformers), Micahel Gambon (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), Ian Hart, Ritchie Coster, Jason Gedrick ("Desperate Housewives"), Kerry Condon ("Rome"), Gary Stevens, Tom Payne, Jill Hennessy ("Crossing Jordan") Nick Nolte

Verdict: It's a Michael Mann production, but at the end of the day, it's about horse racing, which is almost as boring as golf.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 31
9pm "Ringer" (The CW)
Spoilers: Andrew will re-propose to faux Siobhan. "We will find out what exactly caused the rift between Siobhan and Bridget and get the 411 on the precise catalyst for Henry and Siobhan’s love affair." Juliet's claim that her teacher raped her will have an unexpected twist. We'll get to know Agent Machado more. Matthew Del Negro ("Rizzoli & Isles") joins the series as a cocky new FBI agent. And more people will die.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 6

10pm "Smash" (NBC)

Plot: There is more drama behind the scenes than on stage, as a team prepares an ambitious Broadway musical on the life of Marilyn Monroe.

Cast: Debra Messing, Brian D'Arcy James, Christian Borle, Katherine McPhee (The House Bunny), Jack Davenport ("FlashForward"), Megan Hilty, Anjelia Huston, Raza Jaffrey (Sex and the City 2), Jaime Cepero

Verdict: If you love musicals and Broadway and musical competitions, then you're going to love this.

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 7

9pm "The River" (ABC)

Plot: It's about the crew of a state-of-the-art research vessel on a quest to find a missing TV explorer in the haunted Amazon.

Cast: Bruce Greenwood (Star Trek), Leslie Hope ("24"), Joe Anderson (Across the Universe), Paul Blackthorne ("Lipstick Jungle"), Paulina Gaitan (Sin Nombre), Eloise Mumford ("Lone Star"), Shaun Parkes, Thomas Kretschmann (Wanted), Daniel Zacapa, Scott Michael Foster ("Greek"), Katie Featherston (Paranormal Activity), Jeff Galfer ("All My Children")

Verdict: This is for the avid horror lover who likes the mystical and inexplicable.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 12
9pm "The Walking Dead" (AMC)

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 29
10pm "Psych" (USA)

SUNDAY, MARCH 4

10pm "Good Christian Belles" aka "G.C.B." (ABC)

Plot: In order for Amanda Vaughn, a recently divorced mother of two, to get a fresh start, she gmoves back to the affluent Dallas neighborhood where she grew up to find herself in the whirling midst of salacious gossip, Botox, and fraud.

Cast: Leslie Bibb (Zookeeper and "Popular"), Kristen Chenoweth ("Glee"), Annie Potts ("Designing Women"), Jennifer Aspen ("Party of Five"), Miriam Shor ("Swingtown"), Marisol Nichols ("The Gates", Brad Beyer ("Jericho"), Mark Deklin ("Lone Star"), David James Elliott ("JAG")

Verdict: If you need a replacement for "Desperate Housewives"...

TUESDAY, MARCH 6
8:30pm "Breaking In" (FOX)
Spoilers: Megan Mullally ("Parks and Recreation" and "Will & Grace") joins the cast as a new boss, and Erin Richards will play her executive assistant. While the rest of the cast will return, Odette Annable will only have a recurring role now that she's joined "House" and Michael Rosenbaum isn't likely to return since he's directing a movie he wrote.

SUNDAY, MARCH 25
"Mad Men" (AMC)
Spoilers: The creator Matthew Weiner has said that he intends on ending the series in present day.

MONDAY, MARCH 26
8pm "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" (ABC Family)

9pm "Make It or Break It" (ABC Family)

APRIL
"Girls" (HBO)

Plot: A comedy about the experiences of a group of girls in their early 20's.

Cast: Lena Dunham (Tiny Furniture), Jemima Kirke, Allison Williams, Adam Driver, and Zosia Mamet

Verdict: It's written by one of Hollywood's up-and-coming young screenwriters, who is said to have a refreshing take on the 20something set.

BEST OF 2011 MUSIC: Best Videos of 2011

2012-01-08T03:06:00.008-05:00

Here are the best videos of the year by category. Click on the photos to watch the videos:

BEST ACID TRIP: Ke$ha's "Blow"
90s heartthrob (for some) James Van Der Beek + unicorns that bleed rainbows = Somebody's gotta be high.

BEST BIBLICAL REFERENCE: Magnetic Man's "Getting Nowhere" feat. John Legend
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse as hooded bikers.

BEST CAMEOS: Chris Brown's "Beautiful People"
Many videos with celeb cameos look orchestrated and excessive, but this video actually made it look organic. List of notable cameos: Swizz Beatz, The Game, Tyga, Estelle, Lil Bow Wow, P. Diddy, Pharrell Williams, Brandy, Timbaland, and T-Pain.

BEST CHOREOGRAPHY: Beyoncé's "Run the World"
Honestly, she makes every other popstar's attempt to "dance" in a video seem pathetic. Look around. There's no one else who can do it better. Britney gave up the throne years ago.

BEST COMEDY: Sara Bareilles's "Gonna Get Over You"
At first this video seemed...kind of racist. It's not often that you see a white girl dancing around with a bunch of cholos, but then the ending delivers an extremely funny and unexpected twist that explains it all. Who knew Sara had a sense of humor? Or that she'd let Jonah Hill take the director's chair?

BEST CONCERT MIX: Lupe Fiasco's "The Show Goes On"
Concert videos are lazy and boring and completely unappreciated. Fiasco's, however, doesn't seem like a quick-and-dirty afterthought. There's impressive cinematography, fluid transitions, and even a sense that his journey to the stage is a culmination of everything he's worked towards as it flips from the young Fiasco to the present day Fiasco.

BEST DRESS-UP: Jessie J's "Who's Laughing Now"
A young Jessie J rages against her two-faced, middle school bullies, while the present day Jessie J plays dress up and is utterly unrecognizable.

BEST LOVE STORY: James Morrison's "I Won't Let You Go"
It goes from him laying down with her in solidarity to everyone who's watching laying down too. It gives this odd feeling of national unity.

BEST POLITICAL MESSAGE: Lupe Fiasco's "Words I Never Said"
The video shows a world muzzled by the government, who brainwashes and censors the public.

BEST REHEARSAL: Beyonce's "Love on Top"
Leave it to Beyonce to make boy bands look uncoordinated.

BEST REMAKE: Cults's "Go Outside"
This video starring Emma Roberts and Dave Franco reminded me of the 1987 rom-com Mannequin, except instead of being a plastic doll, Roberts' character climbs out of a film and falls in love with an amateur filmmaker, only to return to her world and break his heart.

BEST SEQUEL: Beastie Boys's "Make Some Noise"
Seth Green, Danny McBride, and Elijah Wood play the young versions of those veteran rappers so that they can continue the saga of the greatest party ever recorded. Later on, Maya Rudolph, Kirsten Dunst, John C. Reilly, Jack Black, Will Ferrell, and several actors join them.

BEST SOLO: The Black Keys's "Lonely Boy"
So, the band got this black dude to basically dance throughout their entire song. Just him. It looks like it takes place in the 70s, but no, it's 2011. So simple. Yet endlessly entertaining.

BEST THROWBACK: Chris Brown's "Look at Me Now" feat. Busta Rhymes and Lil Wayne
This is your average ghetto rave dance party in an abandoned warehouse. (You've been to one of those before, right?) What makes it cool though are the vibrant neon colors and the throwback homage to Busta Rhymes' 90s video for "Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Could See," where he use to get a lot more creative then his rap equals, distorting visuals and playing dress up.

BEST TRAGEDY: Best Coast's "Our Deal"
It's a modern day Romeo & Juliet, a mix of West Side Story and Grease, directed by Drew Barrymore and starring Chloe Moretz, Tyler Posey, Alia Shawkat, Miranda Cosgrove, Shailene Woodley, and Donald Glover. It's only four minutes long but it managed to sum up the story quite well. And in place of dialogue, there are written and spray-painted notes. It was cleverly adapted.

BEST TRANSFORMATION: Katy Perry's "Last Friday Night"
Katy never ceases to amaze me when it comes to not taking herself seriously.

BEST TWIST: Childish Gambino's "Bonfire"
Donald Glover stars in his own horror music video where he plays a man who barely escapes a lynching when his rope is cut. He looks for help and discovers a bonfire of young people who are unaware that a man is coming to lynch one of them. He runs and screams to save them only to discover they can't see him and that he's actually a character in their horror story. Then he ends up back where he was, noose around his neck, freshly cut down, like he's damned to repeat the nightmare over and over. That's one way not to dance around the issue.

BEST VIRAL VIDEO: Beyonce's "Move Your Body"
Beyonce had a "try to make kids lose weight" campaign this year, remixing one of her old beats and making a dance to it. It swept the internet, and schools and kids everywhere were all too pleased to remake it. It's adorable.

BEST VISUALS: The Strokes's "Taken for a Fool"
They illustrated the vibrations of their music with dancing drops of colorful liquid and multiple incarnations of themselves. This is what it feels like on the inside when I listen to music.

BEST OF 2011 MUSIC: Best Album Covers

2012-01-02T23:48:00.001-05:00

These album covers were chosen for their unique and artistic design.

Bayside Killing Time That astronaut is straight flossing. Chevelle Hat Off to the Bull Nice mid-action shot. Funeral for a Friend Welcome Home Armageddon An awesomely morbid, (literally) nuclear family. In Flames Sounds of a Playground Fading That's a very interesting way of depicting death. Not just a crow, but a cloaked crow of death. Raphael Saadiq Stone Rollin' It's cool that the cover projects the audience he's aiming for. The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus Am I the Enemy The gas mask stencil is a great way to symbolize the dichotomy between good and evil in the listener. Simple Plan Get Your Heart On It's cool how they designed so many different band posters with styles from different decades. Speed of Darkness Flogging Molly The title may be disturbing, but the pinwheel sketch of a guy wrestling a skeleton looks cool. The Lonely Island Turtleneck and Chain They look ridiculous, but they've perfectly captured the overly confident cool of the 90s--both for boy bands and rap groups. The Antlers Burst Apart From afar it looks like a stain of something that splattered on the floor, but the more I stare at it the more it looks like the glittery entrance into an enchanted forest. Intentional or not, it looks beautiful. The Roots Undun This band has always been true to their name, never straying from their roots, and this black and white photo of black kids finding an unorthodox way of having fun is a perfect homage to a ghetto childhood. Wale Ambition My brother told me that an artist actually drew this (and that she didn't get to finish before they released it). I didn't even realize it was drawn. It really does look like him, which is rare with album portraits.

BEST OF 2011 TV: Best New TV Shows

2011-12-31T17:56:00.000-05:00

"Shameless" (SHO)
Television tends to be a mirror of society. And while it may seem insane to think that there exists a family of six that con and steal their way out of each month's debt, because their alcoholic dad and flake of a mom can't be relied on, more of them exist than you can imagine. This series is unapologetically raw and intense. It'll make you laugh. It'll break your heart. But one thing you'll never do is judge, because you'll be too busy wishing you had the balls to survive their city and their life. Wishing you had the balls to jack a meat truck and turn your kitchen into a meat market, to break into your shoplifter's home and steal back the gun he took, to be so bold as to fall in love even though you've seen ample evidence as to the irredeemable nature of humankind. They make you want to be shameless.

"Revenge" (ABC)
Crime. Betrayal. Vengeance. Eternal love. The essential ingredients of this suspenseful nighttime soap that isn't diluted with goofy "Desperate Housewives" antics or inevitably inconsequential "Gossip Girl" revenge plots. It's instead inflicted with methodical scheming, decades of dormant rage, and a merciless mastermind. The writers have not only succeeded in creating a deliciously vindictive protagonist that viewers can root for, they also provided her with a formidable foe. Much like daytime soaps, the matriarch of the series goes to great lengths to protect her children from the world. But that's not the only component the series shares with soaps. The writers managed to take everything intriguing about a soap opera and make it darker. There might be secret gay lovers, con men, hitmen, husband-stealing best friends, long lost loves, and forbidden love, but it never seems over-the-top or melodramatic. And when it is, you crave it. At the beginning of the series, it was fun to wait and wonder how every little thing Emily did would eventually result in the destruction of one of her enemies. But now her airtight plan is starting to unravel, and it's become just as fun to see how quickly she thinks on her feet, how ruthless she is without giving herself enough time to come to terms with what she must do. Her determination is entrancing.

"New Girl" (FOX)
I'll admit. I was a bit quick to judge when I first saw this comedy series. I was especially hard on the resident douchebag Schmidt. However, in my defense, the series has changed considerably since the pilot. The token black guy (slash obligatory minority, after the "there's no black people in the 'Friends' universe debacle of '03) is played by a different actor and his character is less rage driven. The douchebag jar is rarely used. Schmidt is considerably less unlikable. And Nick, the so-called love interest, isn't a basket case. The characters organically evolved the longer they became exposed to one another. Much like in real life, they took each other's advice and became better people for it. And while they grew and healed, they made me laugh my ass off. Honestly, of all the TV shows I wish I could step into Pleasentville-style, "New Girl" looks like the most fun. I wish I was there for whatever discussion led to them cooking a turkey in a dryer. I wish I was there to watch Jess try to pickup guys in a bar like a 1940s dame with her dress tucked into her underwear. I wish I was there to mess with Schmidt's Thanksgiving cooking "system." I wish I got roller skates for Christmas/Hannukah that I didn't know how to use but still decided to put on inside the apartment. And I definitely wish I was there to see Paul run and scream like a little girl when he found a dead old lady in the bathroom. These are heartwarming and hilarious moments you just don't get day after day in the real world. And they're with sincerely entertaining friends that are rarely as consistent in real life. That's why they're the new "Friends." Everyone who watches just wants to be apart of the gang.

"Suits" (USA Network)

There's this rumor that lawyers are the scum of the Earth. They lie, they manipulate, they coerce. They're criminals who know every loophole of the law. They're practically untouchable. As many legal procedurals there have been, including "The Good Wife," currently the best on TV right now, there has never been a series (to my knowledge) that's openly embraced the thrill of outsmarting another lawyer or dancing around the law. None that's openly manipulated the law for their own gain. "Suits" raises the stakes, because not only does it have two protagonists who are willing to break the law to do the right thing, but it introduces the possibility that all the good they've done can be undone by a single secret. That creeping thought makes every close call that much more suspenseful. And every case that much more interesting. The writers have also managed to spice up the way cases are won. Much like "The Good Wife," this series's lawyers think outside of the box and take unexpected chances. Perhaps it's misleading. No law career will ever be this fun. Unless of course the lawyer is a genius con artist who never went to law school. Then every day is an adventure.

"Episodes" (SHO)
British TV shows being adapted for American television has become so common that at this point it's just laughable. What makes it so funny is that there's pretty much a 98% guarantee that the series will suck. The creators of this series found the humor in that so appealing that they made an entire show about it. Relax. It's not like they're beating a dead horse. It's the premise, not a recurring joke. They've tapped into what it's like to be a creative foreigner who's seduced by Hollywood and all of its promises only to be rudely awoken by the reality of its inner-workings. As outsiders, we viewers, have heard rumors of development deals falling through or being cannibalized at the last minute. For the most part, we turn a blind eye until we see the product. Exceptions to that rule are adaptations of beloved novels (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Hunger Games, The Hobbit, etc.) and unnecessary remakes (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Spider-Man, Superman, Oldboy, Ghostbusters, Footloose, Dirty Dancing, etc.). However, on occasion some Americans may have already seen the British version of a series and refuse to entertain the idea that an American version is even necessary, let alone can be done as well or even better. This series has fun with that belief, mocks American television, degrades American actors, and highlights the affect that Hollywood has on everyone—even intellectual imports. It's very much a series for fans of Ricky Gervais, Russell Brand, John Oliver, and every other foreign comedian who finds our society shockingly inept.

"2 Broke Girls" (CBS)

Many TV shows have logically integrated the current state of the economy into their storylines. The families on "The Middle" and "Raising Hope" spend every episode figuring out how to make due with less. The doctors on "Grey's Anatomy" faced budget cuts and mandatory downsizing. Both husbands on "How I Met Your Mother" and "Parenthood" struggled to find work in niche markets. And "Parks and Recreation" organized a huge fundraiser to save their department from becoming obsolete. But no series has managed to reflect how the economy is affecting the lives of young adults and recent graduates, until now. Without the financial support of their suddenly unemployed or economically anxious parents, or the promise of job security with every diploma, this generation has been forced to get creative with how they make their money. The traditional careers of doctor, lawyer, and teacher are no longer apart of the overall endgame. A lack of employment has surprisingly inspired a call for innovation, to not only supply consumers with the specific products they demand, from convenient apps to custom clothing, but also create jobs in the process. We're moving away from the generic and mass produced, and towards the artisanal. And this series is an interesting—while also often perverse, crass, and CBS-style goofy—look at the makings of an entrepreneurial endeavor. This is where it all starts. In the white ghetto of Brooklyn. At 2 a.m. Blood, sweat, and alcohol icing every single cupcake. One dime at a time. It's like an anthropological study with dirty jokes and hipster hateration.

"Up All Night" (NBC)

Back in the 00s, when shows like "Notes from the Underbelly" (2007) and "In the Motherhood" (2009) were testing the primetime waters for potential baby-centric TV shows after the success of Knocked Up and Baby Mama, I was onboard for parenting humor. I mean, who doesn't want to see two educated adults being driven crazy by a 10lb poop machine? Right? Right? Well apparently, America. That's who. Neither series made it. But it would appear that NBC learned from ABC's mistakes. Instead of focusing on the monotonous preparation of having a child or the quirky behavior of a group of moms, they grounded the series around this late-bloomers couple, who admittedly have no idea what they're doing but realistically handle every situation as any normal person would. There are plenty of parents who can't leave their kid alone with their insanely irresponsible friend. Plenty of parents who go apeshit with the Christmas decorations just to get a rise out of their kid. Plenty of parents who either feel like they're missing out on their kid's early years or are in dire need of a break from 24/7 baby duty. These are all relatable and yet realistically humorous scenarios that parents and future parents have and will experience. And what lures in those viewers who don't have baby-on-the-brain at the moment, besides the narcissistic and neurotic Ava's daily crises, is the underlying desire to stay cool even while driving a minivan and carrying a diaper bag. Because if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that we never want to be as lame as our parents. (Side note: My parents were never lame and I still want to be cooler.)

"Suburgatory" (ABC)

Narration has long been a common storytelling technique. You'll find it in various forms on "How I Met Your Mother," "The Middle," "Desperate Housewives," "Grey's Anatomy," "Gossip Girl," and technically "Burn Notice." And documentary-style shows like "The Office," "Parks and Recreation," and "Modern Family" use commentary as narration. But it's been a while since the narration has been done by a child. The best that I can remember are "Wonder Years" and "My So Called Life." Both of those shows were heralded for their intense look into the lives of adolescents and the tumultuous moments that were fueled by their "raging" hormones. I'm glad to see the trend returning with "Suburgatory." And I'm especially glad it's with the snarky, suburbs-hating, Daria-like character Tessa. It's one thing to tap into the whiny ramblings of a teenage girl. It's another when that girl is not only funny, but mature enough to be critical of the superficial and pathetic practices of everyday life. She's our id come to life.

"Pan Am" (ABC)

Trying to make the case that this is a feminist series about women who chose to travel the world and go on adventures instead of becoming trophy wives and stay-at-home moms may be a little far-fetched. The stewardess age limit, monthly weighings, form-fitting uniforms, marriage clause, and secretly acceptable sexual harassment sort of muddy that claim. But the series does succeed in capturing the time period, telling heart-wrenching backstories and love stories, and intriguing its viewers with Cold War espionage. I think if there was more sex and nudity or if the lead actors were all males, it would be a bigger hit. But I'm glad for once women are getting their stories told, that they're at the head of the action. Too often women are portrayed as passive and reactive. There's nothing realistic about women simply existing to chase men. Whether or not the series is canceled is still to be determined. For now, however, we can continue to enjoy the budding romances, the increasingly dangerous missions, and the everyday life of 1960s independent women.

BEST OF 2011 TV: Best Episodes

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There are certain TV shows that we've always wanted to get into. The problem is if you watch the wrong episode—even if it's the pilot—it might not be the best representation of why the series is awesome. If you've never seen these shows, watch these episodes and you'll know why you should. Some of them are even Emmy-worthy. *Beware Spoilers*

cbs
2 Broke Girls
"And Hoarder Culture"
Max is filled with uncharacteristic giggly glee when she discovers real life hoarders. She nervously kisses Johnny's secret girlfriend, in an attempt to explain why she kissed him right in front of her. And Johnny coyly professes his love for her with graffiti.

Big Bang Theory

"The Good Guy Fluctuation"

Sheldon pathetically spends the entire episode trying to scare everyone, and his ultimate victory, popping out of the seat cushions, is quite gratifying.

"The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition"

Sheldon gets so jealous when Amy goes out with Stuart that he crashes their movie date and negotiates the terms of their exclusive relationship, becoming more territorial than ever before.

How I Met Your Mother
"Last Words"
Marshall listens to the voicemail his father left him before he died and soaks in his last words.
"Mystery Vs. History"
Ted tries his hardest not to social-network stalk his date before seeing her to avoid visualizing her as a walking Facebook profile of pre-learned personal information. It was a very clever commentary on our current social behavior.
"The Stinson Missile Crisis"
Robin is the narrator for this episode, where she tells a very longwinded story to explain to her therapist why she has court-mandated therapy—so longwinded her therapist has to keep redirecting her back to the original story.

"Symphony of Illumination"
The episode opens with Robyn telling her own kids a story and by the end we discover that not only are those not her kids, but she can't have kids, she never even adopts, and she implies that she spends most of her life focusing on her career, which would suggest that she doesn't marry Barney. Most fakeouts are unappreciated and a waste of time, but this one was just sad. The episode ends with Ted promising Robyn that even if she doesn't have children or get married, she'll always have her friends, especially him, and then he unveils a Christmas lights show that he set up in their apartment.

Person of Interest
"Witness"
Reese and Finch helped a seemingly innocent schoolteacher evade the mob after he witnesses a hit. We inevitably learn that he not only performed the hit, he's the son of an imprisoned mob boss, and he's spent many years getting close to the children of his father's enemies so that he could learn everything about them and take over the town.

The Good Wife
"Executive Order 13224"
Elsbeth Tascioni returned to represent Alicia during an interrogation that involved a sensitive terrorist case. And the new associate Caitlin finds a creative way to figure out what was redacted on the government documents in their case. It was all-around clever lawyering.
"Parenting Made Easy"
Grace accidentally butt-dials Alicia too many times for her to consider it an accident, and in a panicked state runs all over the city trying to find her. Without being asked to, Kalinda finds Grace getting baptized in a church by a youtube evangelist, brings her home, and refuses to come in and take credit for it. Worried that such a scare was a punishment for her involvement with Will, Alicia breaks up with him and decides to simplify her life.
"What Went Wrong"
After learning that Kalinda was the one who found Grace, Alicia chews Cary out for gunning for Kalinda and arresting her for harassment, then forces him to release her. They thank each other and have a very quick but poignant moment. And, best of all, we discover that Wendy Scott-Carr did not in fact take Peter's job offer to investigate Lockhart & Gardner and find the judge bribery that he expects Will of, but to basically coerce and/or blackmail Will into helping her collect enough information to take Peter down. I've never wanted to hug a villain more than I did in that scene.

The Mentalist

"Strawberries & Cream"

Grace discovers her fiancee is a Red John plant, he tries to kill Teresa, and Grace is force to kill him. Meanwhile, Patrick confronts a man he believes to be Red John and murders him in the middle of a mall. It was the most emotionally-driven action the series has seen yet.

"Pink Tops"

The only reason I love this episode is because someone finally made Cho uncomfortable. He's spoken to plenty of criminals who've tried to get a rise out of him before, but the only one who succeeded was a hooker-turned-CI named Summer. She makes him incredibly uncomfortable and I love it.

"Fugue in Red"

Patrick is drowned at a crime scene and wakes up as his former, pre-married, fake psychic, con artist self. He tries to flirt with both Teresa and Grace, toys with Rigsby and Cho, and steals from a crime scene. He's completely disreputable, but that's not what made it one of the best episodes of the year. It was the last two minutes when Teresa decided she needed to shock him back to reality before he reverted to his self-destructive ways. She brings him to his house where his family was murdered and shows him the room with the bloody Red John smiley face smeared on the wall. His shoulders slump and he becomes immobile, and all Teresa can say is "I'm sorry." You could just see the life drain right out of him and the Patrick Jane we're more familiar with returns. I don't think I realized just how broken he was until that moment.

nbc
Community
"Remedial Chaos Theory"
During a board game controlled by the roll of dice, we're taken through several alternate realities that show us the different ways one scenario could've happened, and revealing secrets we otherwise wouldn't have known, like the growing affections between Brita & Troy and Jeff & Annie, Pierce's jealousy of Troy moving in with Abed, and Shirley's growing impatience with being ignored.
"Studies in Modern Movement"
The group tries to help Annie move in with Troy and Abed but things go awry when she becomes frustrated by their lifestyle. It isn't until they sit her down so that they can perform a puppet show they wrote just for her that she starts to feel at home. Later on, Annie joins in on the puppet show to reenact it for Brita and Jeff, and they enjoy it a LOT more than you think they would—to the point of crying.

Parenthood

"Clear Skies From Here On Out"

After Alex is cleared of all charges regarding the assault at the kegger he tried to pick Haddie up from, Alex breaks up with her. The best scene isn't when he dumps her or brings her home. It's when he apologizes to her mom Kristina for lying about his criminal background, sincerely laments not being apart of their family anymore, since he doesn't have one of his own, and hugs her goodbye. It was really sad to see him give all of that up, considering how little he has.

Parks and Recreation

"Soul Mates"

Leslie tries an online dating service, but doesn't end up with a stranger as she suspects. Instead she's inexplicably paired off with Tom, who later reveals that he creates profiles for each type of desperate woman so he gets more results. He spends the entire episode pretending to be into Leslie and to get back at him, she kisses him and shuts him up for good.

"The Fight"

Tom debuts his new liquor, SnakeJuice, and gets everyone drunk. Drunk Ann and Leslie have their first argument, and most of it is hilariously nonsensical. Meanwhile, Ron is dancing around like a bobble head and it's probably the funniest drunk impersonation I've ever seen.

"Road Trip"

Leslie struggles to suppress her feelings for Ben when Chris sends them on a road trip together. He pops up to surprise them, and every time they get close, he interrupts. Back at the office, Tom uses his coworkers to try out a new game show to see how well they know each other, and Andy and April do horribly. Meanwhile, Ron educates a young girl on his views of "the importance of government," turning her into a mini version of him.

"The Bubble"

Ben meets Leslie's mother to Leslie's horror, and in the process of trying to introduce himself as Leslie's boyfriend somehow accidentally implies an interest in her and she comes onto him.

"Pawnee Rangers"

Leslie creates an all-girl wilderness group to rival Ron's all-boy wilderness group, and he soon learns that the boys of today are not as rugged as he'd like them to be. In the end, Leslie puts an ad in the paper that describes exactly what Ron is looking for and manages to attract Ron-like children who are game for absolutely no fun. Meanwhile, Tom and Donna try to teach Ben how to relax, resulting in him buying an extremely authentic-looking Batman costume—and putting it on.

"The Trial of Leslie Nope"

Chris takes Leslie to court, accusing her of using her relationship with Ben to bend the law. She fights for her reputation and wins, but ultimately it's determined that one of them will have to quit. Before Leslie can even think of the consequences, she's informed that Ben not only already resigned from his position hours ago, but he declared on the record that he loved her. She then makes the really old court reporter come to his house so that she can say on the record that she loves him too.

"Citizen Knope"

Leslie learns that the campaign duo that approached her last season to run for governor is no longer interested in backing her because her polling numbers are low. Meanwhile, her co-workers spend all day trying to make something for her to repay her for the sincerely thoughtful gifts she's given them over the years. To her delight, they build a gingerbread recreation of the office, and then inform her that they intend on being her campaign team, each with their own position and responsibilities. I haven't been this excited for an election since Obama '08 baby!!!

The Office

"The Search"

An emergency with CeCe forces Jim to abandon Michael at a gas station—without his phone or wallet—and Holly, Erin, and Dwight scour Scranton to find him. It was fun to see how well Holly knew Michael that she could find him so easily.

"Garage Sale"

Michael decides to ask Holly to marry him, and everyone helps him set up a tour of all their romantic moments in the office ending with a heavily candle-lit room that sets off the sprinklers, but nobody moves as they wait for her response. It made Pam & Jim's gas station proposal look as romantic as a bank transaction.

"Goodbye, Michael"

Michael decides to say his goodbyes a day early without telling anyone so that he can avoid the crying and overall drama. The only person who notices is Jim, and...okay now I'm crying...

"Spooked"

Dwight bonds with Robert's semi-sociopathic son, and you get the feeling Dwight would make a great dad—to a serial killer, but still.

Up All Night
"First Night Away"
Chris and Reagan attempt a romantic evening away, but it is their first time away from Amy overnight. When their sitter cancels at the last minute, Ava volunteers to step in. They of course don't trust her so they end up spying on her. Ava calls one of the single dads from the emergency contact list that she met while out with Amy after crusty food traps Amy in her highchair. Even though she's distracted by flirting with him, the minute she hears something in the backyard, she flips into protective mode, and proves she can be trusted. For a woman with seemingly no maternal instinct whatsoever, that was pretty sweet.

Whitney
"The Wire"
Whitney and Alex argue about whether or not Alex uses a condescending tone. Whitney asks Mark for help catching him in the act with a hidden camera. Lily, Roxanne and Neal gather around the TV to watch the drama unfold. Later, Alex's brother Brian visits and Whitney discovers where Alex gets the condescending tone from. The best part is when the others go out to get food, Mark absent-mindedly lets Alex in, and completely forgets to cover the TV which is streaming footage from his apartment. I think I freaked out as much as he did.

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Fringe

"Subject 13"

During a flashback, we learn how resistant Peter was to believing Walter was his father at first, how Walter met Olivia, what kind of childhood she had, and just how strong her connection to Peter was. You get the feeling they're destined, and he had to cross a universe to find her.

"Lysergic"

William Bell's psyche is fighting to take over Olivia's body, so the actress has to not only act like a man but impersonate ~~Spock~~Leonard Nimoy. It's a funny sight to see.

Glee
"Mash Off"
Finn gets tired of Santana's constant bullying, so he kind of outs her in the hallway. A candidate's daughter overhears, tells her dad, and he uses Santana's connection to Sue to insinuate that Sue is gay too. With his commercial, he'll out Santana to everyone in the city, including her family. After performing one of the best covers of the year, a mashup of Adele's "Rumor Has It" and "Someone Like You," she smacks Finn so hard everyone stops breathing, including the viewers.
"I Kissed a Girl"
Finn tries to make up for what he did and make Santana feel proud of who she is, so it becomes a female-appreciation episode. After a jock makes disgusting sexual advances towards Santana and suggests a three-way, she and Rachel sing Katy Perry's "I Kissed a Girl." But even though it all seems wrapped up nice and tight, the final blow comes when her grandmother disowns her. Instead of reverting back to her bullying ways though, she and The Trouble Tones agree to make peace with the New Directions, and they sing the beautiful K.D. Lang song "Constant Craving."
"Hold on to Sixteen"
We're treated to two amazing performances: The Trouble Tones's "I Will Survive/Survivor" mashup and the New Directions's Jackson Family tribute that starts with The Jackson 5's "ABC" goes into Janet Jackson's "Control" and ends with Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror." It was epic.

"Extraordinary Merry Christmas"
The glee club is asked to create a holiday special for a local PBS station and Artie outdoes himself directing a black and white tribute to old school Christmas specials. The songs aren't that amazing, but the production, taking us back in time and capturing the vibe of the period, was perfect.

New Girl
"Naked"
Jess and Schmidt make Nick self-conscious about his "little pooch where he puts his extra cookies" so he goes to his room and starts dancing to reggae music naked in front of a mirror, in order to pump himself up before a hot date. The music is too loud, so Jess accidentally walks in on him. He spends most of the episode trying to avoid her and the inevitable awkward conversation they'll have, and she spends it trying to apologize. In the end, she resolves to even the score by baring herself to him, but accidentally does so in front of his date.

"Thanksgiving"
Jess gets up the nerve to ask a fellow teacher Paul out on a date, and it just so happens to be on Thanksgiving. But the boys were looking forward to a relaxing day watching a football game topped off with Black Friday shopping. So Jess has to force them to get into the spirit of things. Schmidt takes over cooking, Cece tortures him with her unsanitary kitchen habits, Winston bonds with Paul, and Nick tries to avoid him at all costs. When the frozen turkey burns in the dryer (yes, I said dryer) and fills the apartment with smoke, they're forced to relocate to a neighbor's apartment...where they find her dead. Officially topping off the worst date ever.

abc
Castle
"Knockout"
The chief dies after revealing he was involved in the conspiracy surrounding the death of Beckett's mother, and at the funeral, Beckett is shot. As Castle cradles her, the music swells, everyone's screams drop out, and all you can hear is him repeatedly whisper, I love you Kate.
"Cops and Robbers"
Castle and his mom are being held hostage in a bank robbery, and his daughter Alexis blames Beckett for always putting her dad in danger. Alexis has always been pro-Beckett, so it was interesting to see her turn against her.

Grey's Anatomy
"Dark Was the Night"
Alex and Meredith are involved in a nerve-wracking car accident as they're trying to transport a pre-mature newborn in a highly flammable ambulance during a storm on a winding road. Meanwhile, even more suspense builds as Christina unknowingly operates on Teddy's husband and he dies. Her nonchalant attitude about the surgery and its fatal outcome, and greater interest in it not going on her record, are in stark juxtaposition with Owen and the chief's terrified caution. Once she realizes who the patient was though, she breaks down. Owen has the toughest job of all: keeping Teddy in the dark and lying about her husband's successful surgery until she finishes her tricky procedure.

Modern Family
"See You Next Fall"
It's a heartwarming episode as the whole family gathers for Alex's graduation. Her parents are trying to keep it together emotionally, while Mitchell keeps poking fun at Cameron for falling into a baby pool. Cameron is naturally outraged, but can't help but laugh when he sees Phil and Claire tumble down a hill, eagerly trying to get to the graduation.
"When Good Kids Go Bad"
Lily shows violent, antisocial, and somewhat homicidal signs of not wanting to share her daddies.

"After The Fire"
The family helps another family reacquire life's necessities after their house burns down. The boys wander off to play with the homeless kid's new remote control plane. The girls join Cameron when he volunteers to drive the moving truck, because he's hellbent on proving that gays can do all the same things as straight men. Alex proves she doesn't have to dress or look like Haley to get boys to like her, when she helps the boys get their toy back from nerdy bullies by using her nerdy feminine wiles. And after Jay hurts his back, Phil jumps at the chance to give him a massage. Jay enjoys it so much, he says I love you. Jay freaks out, worried Phil will blow it out of proportion, but doesn't realize that Phil's excitement and eagerness to talk to him is actually about a job offer that would involve him risking the family's financial security. Jay advises him like he would his own son and instills in him the confidence he needs to take a chance on himself.
"Express Christmas"
The family realizes they're all going to separate places for Christmas, so they try to have it early and prepare everything in a short amount of time. Claire and Haley bond at the mall as Haley taps into her impressive shopping skills, even tricking a shopper into giving her the last toy on the shelf. Manny freaks out about getting kidnapped on vacation and accidentally tasers Phil when he takes him to a shady parking lot to meet a baseball card seller. And Luke confesses that sometimes he doesn't understand if Gloria is saying "Luke" or "look" and they have a bit of a "Who's on First?" moment.

Revenge

"Pilot"

This is the episode where the tone is set and it becomes quite clear just how determined and ruthless lead character Emily Thorne/Amanda Clarke intends on being.

Rookie Blue

"Butterflies"

Andy is put in charge of a concert line and as she's chatting with a young girl, a bullet goes through her head. It happens so abruptly that you can sense the level of shock and horror that Andy is feeling. Later, Sam comforts her and they almost kiss.

Suburgatory
"Thanksgiving"
Tessa begs for George to uphold their Thanksgiving Day Manhattan traditions, but George refuses. Later, she gets Dahlia to take her to the city, she shows her all the fun stuff she can do in the city, and then they catch George making out with an unidentified chick. After she calls him on his anti-nyc bull, he agrees to take her to the city and squeeze in one tradition before the night is over. Earlier that day Lisa refused to dress up as a pilgrim as her mother instructed. In order to punish her, she raised the heat, resulting in her coming downstairs for dinner in the nude and then running outside to be free. Quickly realizing she could be arrested for public indecency, she hides in George's car. So when Tessa and George are driving to New York, she pops up in the backseat and surprises them.

the cw
Gossip Girl
"Empire of the Son"
The climax of Dan and Blair's potential relationship is sealed with a passionate kiss.
"Memoirs of an Invisible Dan"
Dan sits everyone down to tell them about his novel and how he included characters that are somewhat modeled after them. Best of all, the person who is depicted the most lovingly turns out to be Blair not Serena, to Serena's surprise. Marsha! Marsha! Marsha!

The Secret Circle

"Masked"

The circle gets kidnapped and Cassie uses her inexplicably dormant individual power to kill their witch-hunter captor and free them. We get a glimpse of a potentially evil side to her and it's a glimpse of what's to come.

Vampire Diaries
"As I Lay Dying"
A lot of people die and almost die in this episode. It's the most high stakes of the series yet, and nothing unfolds as you expect it to.
"The End of the Affair"
There's a flashback to the 1920s to explain how Stefan as The Ripper met Klaus and his sister, and why Klaus has yet to kill him. Elena learns just how many people The Ripper has killed, and just how sadistic he was. And we learn that Caroline's dad is so hellbent on de-demonizing his vampire daughter that he would go so far as to torture her.

usa network
Suits
"Pilot"
We're introduced to the impressive con artist that is Mike Ross, who finagles his way into a law firm after nearly getting nicked for a drug deal.
"Play the Man"
Mike has to go toe-to-toe with a fellow associate in a mock trial and in order to win he has to take down Rachel on the witness stand by playing on her insecurities, but instead of doing that, he spares her and essentially forfeits the mock trial.

tnt
Leverage
"The Girls' Night Out Job" & "The Boys' Night Out Job"
Both episodes start the same way, but the girls lead all the action in one and the boys lead all the action in the other. But at the same time, each episode hints at the other group's job as if both episodes were happening at the same time. It was very well choreographed.

abc family
Switched at Birth
"The Stag Hunt"
Desperate to communicate his interest in Bay, Emmett decides to just kiss her.
"Pandora's Box"
Bay yells at Emmett for possibly using her to get back at Daphne, and Emmett responds by just kissing her. As they spend more time together, Bay pushes him to speak instead of sign, and he refuses. Then after seeing a shrine to Daphne on his bedroom wall, she realizes how in love he was/is with her.
"The Homecoming"
Daphne finally tells Emmett how she feels and so he has to choose between her and Bay. After an argument where Bay realizes he knows how Daphne feels, Emmett speaks for the first time and professes his love to her.

hbo
Boardwalk Empire
"Ourselves Alone"
Margaret reveals just how devious her nature can be when she tricks agents into letting her into Nucky's office when he gets arrested, and manages to steal his incriminating ledger. Jimmy murders two mafia thugs after they jump him in New York. And Chalky shows how much power he has over the African American community when his cellmates spontaneously turn on another prisoner after hours of animosity and tension between them.
"Under God's Power She Flourishes"
Jimmy mourns Angela's death by getting high on heroine in a hotel room, and has a flashback that explains the incestuous reason he went to war and why he has such a disturbing relationship with his mother. When he returns, he finally stands up to her. And when the Commodore catches him trying to choke her to death, Jimmy kills him.

"To the Lost"
Jimmy subtly says goodbye to everyone. It's so subtle you don't realize it till the last five minutes when he tells Harrow to promise him he'll try harder to be happy. And then he voluntarily goes to his execution, knowing that Nucky's forgiveness was all talk. Everything we learned about Jimmy in the last two episodes—his reasons for enlisting, his damaged youth, and his insatiable desire for a father figure—gave us closure once his heart stopped beating. It was time he rested and be freed from his mother's death grip. (This is probably wishful thinking, but I hope Harrow kills the son of a bitch who murdered Angela and lured Jimmy out, and I hope he kidnaps Jimmy's kid and teaches him how to be an assassin, preferably with a time jump. I'd rather watch that than see that pathetic, disgusting, enterprising witch Gillian fatten yet another child for slaughter. She makes Lucy look like Mother of the Year.)

Entourage

"One Last Shot"

Vince tries to give a producer a second chance, discovers he's still an addict and tries to get him to turn his life around, only to witness his suicide. It's extremely intense for the series, but it was quite the cliffhanger.

showtime
Shameless
"Frank Gallagher: Loving Husband, Devoted Father"
Ian confronts Mickey after he steals Kash's gun, and discovers mid-brawl that Mickey has a major crush on him and they have sex. My favorite part is when he tries to kiss him goodbye and Mickey says, "Kiss me and I'll cut your fucking tongue out." Ever the romantic. (In a later episode, he says something similarly funny when Liam visits him in jail and tries to put his hand on the glass like they do in the movies: "Take your hand off the glass.")
"Nana Gallagher Had an Affair"
The kids fight to keep Liam in their family and each one's heart is broken as they confront their mother and her failures. And Karen's mom finally confronts her husband and has the courage to go outside just to kick him out.
"Father Frank, Full of Grace"
Lip has sex with Karen, tells her that he loves her mid-coitus, and then tries to take it back when she dumps him, swearing he didn't mean it. Then he discovers that she dumped him because she had sex with his dad and he flips out. He tries to run his dad over and kicks his ass, and only forgives him after making up with Karen and after Frank lets him pee on him. Given that Lip is usually quite passive, this much volatile emotion in one episode was very jarring.

BEST OF 2011 TV: Scene-Stealers

2011-12-26T11:00:00.001-05:00

These are the best characters of the year, who kept us coming back every week—even if the show sucked:

Kat Denning's Max from "2 Broke Girls"

Think Roseanne...but hot. She's a saucy, vulgar waitress, who isn't afraid to call people on their bullshit and works overtime to hide her vulnerable side. She makes up one-half of a series duo that's like Laverne & Shirley meets The Odd Couple. It's rare that actresses get to play anything more than pretty, friendly, desperate, or neurotic, so it's refreshing to see the anti-social and anti-establishment youth of today represented during a time of recession and rebellion.
Best Scene: Any time Johnny makes her weak in the knees.

Maya Rudolph's Ava from "Up All Night"

What happens to an 80s one-hit wonder when you extend their five minutes of fame through an Oprah-like daytime talk show? They become a narcissistic, neurotic, fame-whoring ball of insecurity with no understanding of how to live modestly or interact with the middle class. Also referred to in the dictionary as "comedy gold." While the series is mainly about these late-bloomer new parents who are stumbling through parenthood, every episode Ava manages to amp the ridiculous meter up from a 2 to a 10. Whether it's getting into a ghetto argument with her ex-rapper boyfriend, trying to bribe her new boyfriend's daughter for approval, or lifting a baby sideways after she's done "talking" it into liking her. She's what we wish Oprah secretly was, but know Wendy Williams truly is when the cameras are off.
Best Scene: When she tried to babysit Amy, had to call a cute guy from the emergency list because Amy got trapped in the baby seat, then verbally threatens an unseen intruder when she hears a suspicious sound.

Zoe Lister Jones's Lily on "Whitney"

I'll be honest, if I hadn't seen Jones in the Tribeca film Stuck Between Stations this Spring, I would probably find her character incredibly annoying. But knowing that she's capable of heavy drama and snarky comic timing makes me impressed with her ability to slip into this bubbly, cheesy, girly, super enthusiastic character, who behaves rather amused by her own joke before she even says it.
Best Scene: When she tried to describe how she wanted her engagement party by...miming? Signing? Hippie dancing? I don't know.

Naya Rivera's Santana from "Glee"

Santana got the Kirk-treatment this year, a full-fledged subplot and more screen time than even some of the lead actors. And instead of wasting it with weak songs and tempered emotion, she sang and emoted just as passionately as she insulted. Unlike Sue Sylvester, she's not a one-dimensional villain who's only interesting to watch when she's exploiting the insecurities of her fellow glee clubbers. Santana has an off-switch, a soft spot, and a secret desire to be loved unconditionally.
Best Scene: When she sang the Adele mashup and slapped Finn for outting her.

Zooey Deschanel's Jess from "New Girl"

It's like she's from one of those body switching comedies where a child wakes up in an adult body--not-yet-trained in how to flirt and incapable of saying the word "sex" without giggling--except she has amnesia and she doesn't know the switch happened. However, Jess's main allure isn't that she's adorkable or naive. It's that she's unapologetically embarrassing. Nearly every episode she does something (in front of cute boys, no less) that any other insecurity-plagued, conformed-by-society's-standards girl would (probably literally) die of humiliation from. She might have a momentary realization that what she just did was spastic, but she doesn't back down. She may entertain the idea of flirting like a normal human being (versus using the phrase "Hey sailor!" on someone who isn't a sailor), but she never truly changes who she is. You can't ever squash her spirit. If there were a dork parade, she'd proudly be the Grand Marshall.
Best Scene: When she went off on Nick on Thanksgiving and explained all of the sexual things she wanted to do to her date, not realizing that EVERYONE was listening, including the date in question.

Max Greenfield's Schmidt from "New Girl"

At first, this character seemed too douchey. So douchey his roommates made him contribute to a douchebag jar whenever he overdid it. Eventually, with Jess's influence, he became more lovable and less...mace-worthy. We started to see that while he attempted to be a womanizer, he was more abused by women than they were by him. His female coworkers mock him, his weddings-only fuckbuddy treats him like the girl in their relationship, and his dream girl, Cece, likes him best when he's angry at her, so she spent Thanksgiving doing everything humanly possible to piss him off. It's probably because he's not really all that manly, his backbone is like jello, and he's so sensitive I wouldn't be surprised if he had a menstrual cycle. He's like a battered puppy caged by lionesses. All of that unexpected vulnerability, coupled with his occasional whimpering voice, unsuccessful attempts at being cool, and often hilarious one-liners makes him a habitual scene-stealer.
Best Scene: When he stopped finding Cece attractive long enough to scold her for her unsanitary cooking methods and had NO clue she was flirting with him the whole time.

Allie Grant's Lisa from "Suburgatory"

This series makes all suburbanites seem like Rx-addicted, plastic drones with Stepford tendencies and superficial personalities. Anyone who's from the city automatically thinks they're a bunch of loons. Much like Tessa, we find comfort in the one normal human being in town, Lisa. Except Lisa isn't any more normal than her captors. It would seem that being held hostage by them has made her slightly insane. Her heightened reactions to the most basic forms of human affection, whether it's sympathy or generosity, are amplified by her big eyes and paranoid resistance. She kind of always looks like she just escaped from an insane asylum and can't find a way out of the never-ending maze of white picket fences.

Best Scene: When she refused to put on an "authentic" Thanksgiving pilgrim outfit, chose to run out into the street naked and hide in the backseat of Tessa and her dad George's car, only to freak them out later during their ride to the city. It would seem the mental patient finally escaped.

Emily Van Camp as Emily/Amanda from "Revenge"

Women are rarely devious masterminds on television. They're catty, vindictive, and/or obsessive, but they're rarely, if ever, maniacal geniuses who devise masterful plans to systematically destroy an opponent. They're also rarely if ever driven by anything other than a man or popularity. The last time a scorned woman brought hell upon her enemies in such a deliciously dramatic fashion was in the first season of "Gossip Girl." Blair Waldorf was a force to be reckoned with. She could take down a fellow classmate in the span of 24 hours with debilitating blows that no one saw coming. She has since retired to an ever-demeaning station of marrying for money. She's left the Queen B throne unmanned and it seems Emily Thorpe (aka Amanda Clarke) has taken a seat. Watching Emily in action is almost as suspenseful as watching a bullfight. Every blow is figuratively (and sometimes literally) bloodier than the last. She thinks so quick on her feet, and doles out punishments so swiftly that you almost hope someone crosses her again so that you can watch their downfall. All hail the Queen!
Best Scene: When she poisoned Conrad to give him a heart attack and catch Lydia outside of the motel where they were having their affair, and then pretended to accidentally reveal her betrayal to Victoria.

Casey Wilson as Penny from "Happy Endings"

She's a neurotic, delusional, desperate mess, but you've gotta love her. You love that she's desperate enough to become a hipster just to date one. You love that she's so desperate to date her high school crush that she befriends his teenage sister and joins her cult, I mean clique. You love that she only knows Italian when she's drunk and has to stay drunk just to be in a relationship with a hot Italian guy. But most of all, you love that she says ridiculously girly things like a-MAH-zing, despite her mature age and obvious grasp on the English language. She's like every desperate rom-com character that has ever been written and will be written, eager to find love and willing to do anything to get it.
Best Scene: When she tried to keep up the charade about being a certain age and being Jewish.

Adam Pally and Damon Wayans Jr. as Max+Brad on "Happy Endings"
Dynamic duos are a little hard to come by. Most shows focus on harnessing ensemble chemistry, and if any characters break off into pairs, it's usually with a romantic agenda, which is probably why the deep connection between two dudes is referred to as a bromance. Last year's bromantic couple were Abed and Troy from "Community." They're like siamese twins (and at one point they were actually siamese twins). This year, that honor goes to Max and Brad. Unlike Abed and Troy, it isn't about what they do together, but their comedic rhythm. The way they play off each other and score multiple laughs in one scene is electric, especially when the topic of race comes up. They push the envelope to a potentially racist degree and still get away with it. But what's most impressive is how open and honest they are about it. They don't ignore the elephant in the room. They put it on display in their three-ring circus, not afraid to address the jungle fever running through Brad+Jane's relationship or the obvious fact that most straight men (especially black men) are rarely if ever depicted on television as loving and accepting of a gay man. There was this quote going around Twitter a few weeks ago about homophobia and how it's basically the fear that a gay men will treat straight men the same way straight men treat women: like sex objects meant to be ogled and catcalled towards. Well Max is their worst fear come true. He does that and a whole lot more. Meanwhile, Brad is immune to those fears, accepts Max for the fun-loving slob that he is and sometimes acts even gayer than he does. I admire such evolution and boldfaced honesty. It's almost like it's the 22nd century.
Best Scene: When Max discovered that Brad secretly hung out with a black version of him.

Jeremy Allen White as Phillip "Lip" Gallagher on "Shameless"

Bad boys are like my bread and butter. And the smarter they are the better. Therefore Lip was a no-brainer. He's super smart, sarcastic, and utterly shameless. He'll rob you blind, con the education system, outsmart his elders, bullshit his teachers, and discredit your religious and political beliefs without breaking a sweat. But he's not one-dimensional. He doesn't live to condescend and buck the system. It's just his way of life. He has a soft side too. He's very sweet to his younger siblings, sensitive to his gay brother's steady coming out process, fearless when it comes to protecting him, and damaged beyond repair by his parents' abandonment. And sure, he's a manwhore who's in love with a slut, but he's also secretly a charmer and a romantic. He has too many layers to write-off.
Best Scene: When he accidentally tells his girlfriend Karen that he loves her mid-sex and then tries to take it back when she dumps him. He's so frantic and desperate, you can't help but feel for him.

Sam Huntington and Russell Tovey as Josh on "Being Human" (US/UK)
Whether he's British or American, I love Josh. He's the friendliest most apologetic werewolf I've ever seen. He's so selfless that he would quarantine himself from society—and essentially family and love—just to protect them. Damned to an eternity of living within the limbo of humanity and the supernatural, he still manages to be the show's comic relief. His panicked reaction to impending doom is like watching the spastic panic of Scooby and Shaggy. He's cartoonish, but relatable. After all, who wouldn't react frantically to the realization that there are supernatural beings inhabiting the Earth and now you're one of them? His naivete and attempts at rationalizing his way through irrational scenarios is endearing. You can't help but root for him.
Best Scene: Any time he tried to interact with the girl he's interested in, especially when he struggled not to murder her during sex.

Ashley Rickards as Jenna from "Awkward"

I remember how nerve-wracking high school was, whether I was taking a test, trying to make friends, or just trying to make eye contact with my secret crush. Every humiliation was epically scarring and molded me into the deformed human I am today. Needless to say, I get Jenna's pain. I know what it's like to have an insecure bitch bully me, a hot guy flirt with me only when no one's looking, and a decent guy step over his best friend to pursue me while I remain tragically oblivious to the fact. I am Jenna. And I know there are plenty of girls in a wide age range who feel the same way. She's the voice of a generation—an extremely dorky, humiliated generation.
Best Scene: When she drunkenly told Jake off and called him on his shit.

Jackson Rathbone as Nick from "Aim High"

A teenage spy has to juggle assassination assignments and the delicate courtship of an awesome girl he loves to verbally spar with. By day he charms her, impresses her via IM and text, and clarifies any unintentional slights, and by night he kills criminals for the government. It doesn't seem to phase him. He's like a young Jason Statham, chocked full of a healthy dose of insecurities.
Best Scene: Anytime he finds a clever way to escape death and still keep his cover.

TV PILOT REVIEW: SHOWTIME's "Shameless"

2011-12-26T00:09:00.001-05:00

I've been meaning to watch this series for a couple of months now, but nothing ever enticed me to follow through. I heard it was about this white trash family, and that wasn't exactly a selling point. But it stars the Oscar-nominated, Emmy-winning William H. Macy and the Golden Globe-nominated, classically trained singer Emmy Rossum, so I thought it was at least worth a look.

But nothing could've prepared me for the awesomeness that is this series. It's like:

"Malcolm Middle" (rambunctious kids) x "The Middle" (middle class income) x "Weeds" (criminal family business) x "The United States of Tara" (unreliable parent and homoerotic exploration) = A dysfunctional, poverty-stricken family, who resort to unorthodox, and sometimes criminal, methods in order to survive.

Those shows I just mentioned are a fraction of what this show is in both content and quality. This family makes their's look like amateurs. They con and manipulate their way through life so easily and at such young ages that you just can't believe what you're witnessing—and can't help but wish you were as clever.

*spoilers ahead

Each episode you get to know The Gallaghers a little better. And with every knew discovery, you love 'em even more. Macy plays the patriarch Frank, an alcoholic degenerate who relies on disability checks and the kindness of a sex-addicted agoraphobic (Joan Cusack) who dotes on him. He's such scum that he tried to sell his black baby to his ex-wife and her lesbian lover so that he can get her to sign a fake disability claim. He's such scum that he screws one of his son's girlfriends while high on Oxycontin. He's such scum that next season he will actively try to scare his agoraphobic girlfriend back into the house so that she won't stop catering to him. But none of this should be a surprise. After all, he did dump the responsibility of supporting his five children on his 19-year-old daughter two years ago. That's Fiona (Rossum).

She's a saint with a sailor's mouth. She would do anything for her siblings, including forfeit the possibility of true love and any sort of freedom for at least 16 years. She'll take any job, even ones that degrade her self-esteem, and endure any sort of neighborhood criticism if it makes them happy. Life has hardened her a bit. Made her skeptical and untrusting of everyone, especially men. And she'll now probably distrust them even more after the possible love of her life, the secretly rich, car-stealing, medical-school dropout Steve (Justin Chatwin) was blackmailed into the leaving the city by the cop who has a crush on her. But in the hands of her siblings, she melts.

She's not alone though. For the most part, they pull their own weight. One thing you can't deny about the Gallagher's, it's that they're a resourceful bunch. The eldest boy, Phillip aka Lip (Jeremy Allen White), is the smartest—so smart he takes SATs for kids all over the city for a sizable profit. But he's no nerd. He's the resident bad boy, who'll take a beating for his brother from the baddest kid on the block, and even take the fall for him in a car theft charge. Of course, he's not all bravado. The abandonment and neglect instilled by his parents have lowered his self-esteem to the point that he believes someone as disturbed and slutty as his quasi girlfriend Karen (Laura Wiggins) could possibly be "The One." Not that he would ever call her that or admit to that.

Ian (Cameron Monaghan) is his secretly gay little brother, who sleeps with his married Muslim boss and his beard's thuggish brother who shoplifts from his store. He's a sweet redheaded kid with a healthy sexual appetite, and an inexplicable desire to join the Marines, to his big brother's dismay.

Debbie (Emma Kenney) is the youngest girl, who seems far more responsible than the rest. It's probably because she's like 11 or something and isn't at screwing or smoking age. But I like to think that her UNICEF-scamming, police-conning, coupon-clipping, background-checking schemes are a sign of her innate intellect. Which basically means that when she gets into her teen years, she's going to be a handful.

But no more of a handful than that little 9-year-old sociopath Carl (Ethan Cutkosky), who spends his days attacking his classmates and teachers, melting his toys together, microwaving live animals, and setting fires. He's like walking contraception with adorable eyes. Almost as adorable as his baby bro, the two-year-old Liam (played by twins Blake and Brennan Johnson). He doesn't do much besides crawl everywhere, even outdoors, and giggle, but his random blackness adds even more humor to their situation. Also contributing to the comedy are the other supporting characters, their helpful neighbors: the often-naked, medically-adept internet-porn star Veronica (Shanola Hampton) and the often intolerant goofball bartender Kevin (Steve Howey).

Their makeshift family dynamic, the creative ways they get out of jams and make money, and the heartbreaking hardships they endure make this series worth watching and worth rewarding. However, I understand that it's not original, considering it's a remake of a British series by the same name. But I like how seamless and normal it seems for these American children to drink, smoke, and have sex without any hesitation or—as the title would suggest—shame. This is how the reimagining of "Skins" should've been done. Unapologetic, not crass.

TV PILOT REVIEW: SHOWTIME's "Episodes"

2011-12-26T00:04:00.004-05:00

I have probably cut Matt LeBlanc more slack than most "Friends" fans just by enduring two seasons of "Joey." Granted, it was mostly for the joy of seeing Drea de Matteo, who I discovered on "Joey," and not due to any sort of loyalty. Curiosity is what really gets me every time. It's the same reason I try to catch everything Joey Lawrence or Mark-Paul Gosselaar does. I'm eager to see if they can shed their iconic characters and still thrive in this new age of television, where the young and the talented (who are not necessarily the same people) rule.

When I heard the premise for this series—two British writers/producers go to L.A. to adapt their hit series for American audiences and end up doing a dumbed-down version with Matt LeBlanc as their star—I thought it could possibly be funny. The topic was definitely on par with the current industry trends of reproducing bastardized content from foreign nations ("The Office," "Ugly Betty," "Being Human," "Skins," "Shameless," "Prime Suspect," etc.), stripping it of everything that made it good and slathering it in "American" tropes. It was about time someone made fun of that, but I didn't know if it necessarily needed to be made fun of for a half-hour every week.

That would probably explain why they added the subplot of these two British imports arriving as a united front, equally alienated by L.A. culture and bonded by their love, their creativity, and their understandable xenophobia, and then dissolving into this creatively divided, morally corrupted, easily seduced shells of their former self-righteous selves. That, coupled with the constant digs at how "entertainment" is manufactured in L.A., and how nonchalant Americans are about exploitation and the accumulation of wealth, fame, and all of life's pleasures, make it an astute replacement for the void that "Entourage" left behind. While it's true that this series is better written and more entertaining than "Entourage," it does make me miss Ari and Lloyd a little less. I've always found the inner workings of the industry interesting, especially when it's depicted as the capitalistic and manipulative cesspool that I know it to be.

The shining star of the series though isn't even ~~Tribiani~~LeBlanc. Don't get me wrong. He's amazing in this. His sober moments where he's admitting that he knows when to turn Joey on and off and he knows exactly what sells in the American market, and his obnoxious and overly confident playboy personality are all very entertaining. But the highlight for me is Tamsin Greig. Gradually through the series she becomes the voice of reason, as her husband, played by Stephen Mangan, gets sucked in by LeBlanc. Her stunned and dumbfounded expressions, and sarcastic and derisive comments are the highlights of every episode. She reminds me of the female Ricky Gervais. Their line deliveries are very similar, where their voices go up at the end of a judgmental rhetorical question that essentially asks "Are you mad?!" or as we say in America: "Are you fucking kidding me?"

CRUSHWORTHY: Ryan Gosling

2011-12-25T00:00:00.003-05:00

This year has blessed us with some seriously crushworthy guys. So to countdown the 25 days until Christmas, each day I'll put a spotlight on one actor we wish we could catch under the mistletoe. In this case, Santa rewards the naughty and nice.

{DAY 25}
The Sexiest Man Alive // Ryan Gosling
I think we can all agree that Ryan was robbed this year when People magazine crowned Bradley Cooper the Sexiest Man Alive. First off, Cooper should've been given that royal honor in '09 when The Hangover swept the box office. Secondly, I think Gosling has been kicking ass since last year with the critically adored Blue Valentine, and continued to do so with this year's romantic crime thriller Drive, the romantic dramedy Crazy, Stupid, Love., and the political drama The Ides of March. He was a shoe-in.

I first noticed Gosling's Crushworthiness in 2007 when he was promoting Lars and the Real Girl on "Ellen." He taught her how to dance salsa music. You have no idea how epic it is to see someone of non-Latin descent not only be interested in dancing Spanish music, but also know how to dance it well. And then there was the added bonus that he's a dude, who are usually rhythmically challenged.

Plus, you can tell by all of his interviews, both print and television, that he has the greatest sense of humor, he's self-deprecating, and sweet. One fan actually created a tumblr where she adds pickup lines slash flirtatious statements to random photos of him that start with "Hey Girl...", like "Hey Girl, Thanks for cutting the sleeves off. Now, I can take you to the gun show." It's a shrine to the new public persona that he's developed with each role that he plays a smooth, debonaire, cooler-than-cool man that guys want to dress like and be friends with, and girls want to...mount. The six-pack display in the Crazy, Stupid, Love. trailers should've been enough to score him the honor. I mean, honestly, he was SO hot, he looked photoshopped!

CRUSHWORTHY: Henry Cavill

2011-12-24T16:44:00.000-05:00

{DAY 24}
The Hero // Henry Cavill
The search for Superman was long and arduous, but when the producers finally decided on who would play the invincible alien, they chose a Brit. He became apart of a new trend. Our superheroes were all being cast from across the pond, from Batman (Christian Bale) to Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield). Fanboys were not pleased. Luckily, Cavill actually looks the part, and worked hard to look it even more. Paparazzi snapped topless shots of him on set and the studio released a photo of him in costume. From then on the anti-foreigner chatter died down, and the skepticism mutated into anticipation.

But I was never quite sold on it all. I had yet to see Cavill in anything that would suggest he could carry an entire franchise on his own, while mastering an American accent and not looking like a complete fool in blue tights and a red cape. I never saw the oversexualized Showtime series "The Tudors," Woody Allen's oddball rom-com Whatever Works, or the romantic epic Tristan + Isolde, and I barely noticed him in the fantasy adventure Stardust or the revenge epic The Count of Monte Cristo. That's the main reason I decided to see Immortals. I mean, Tarsem Singh is an amazing director, but I am sort of worn out on all the barrage of recent mythology (Percy Jackson, Clash of the Titans, Thor, etc.). This was Cavill's first official lead role. And I think he did wonderfully. The story reminded me of Clash of the Titans, but Cavill's character was a lot more three-dimensional and easier to empathize with than Sam Worthington's. He nailed inspirational speeches, rash acts of revenge, unspeakable bravery in the face of certain defeat, and even romancing a virgin oracle. He's the dreamiest hero yet.

CRUSHWORTHY: Luke Evans

2011-12-23T14:56:00.000-05:00

{DAY 23}
The Emoter // Luke Evans
I've been hearing about Luke Evans for a while now. I can't recall why or for what films, but I do know that I made a mental note to see him in action. The first film I saw him in was Clash of the Titans. He played Apollo. It was brief, but he definitely had a strong screen presence. The film where he really made a great impression though was Immortals, where he played Zeus. There's something about his chiseled jaw, piercing hazel eyes, and slicked back mane that makes him seem regal and authoritative. Even though he's only a few years older than Henry Cavill (and the rest of the actors who played his children), you totally bought their father-son relationship. He seems to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders and take the responsibility very seriously. This visible burden was also obvious in The Three Musketeers, where he played the promiscuous yet religious musketeer Aramis, and also the little-seen crime drama Blitz, where he played a detective who steps up and cares for his drug-addicted one-night stand after her friend dies trying to save her.

It's easy for British actors to rely on their accent to do most of their acting, but Evans emotes more than he speaks. I wouldn't be surprised if producers hired him more for his facial reactions than anything else. Either way, he's definitely proven to be a hot commodity, especially when action, mystery, and adventure are involved. Next year, we can see him in the Edgar Allan Poe mystery The Raven, and the Peter Jackson adapted Lord of the Rings prequel The Hobbit. The true test though will be in his first lead role in the adaptation of J. Saunders Elmore's The Amateur American, where he'll play an American who is framed for murder in Paris.

CRUSHWORTHY: Tom Hardy

2011-12-22T02:08:00.001-05:00

{DAY 22}
The Meathead // Tom Hardy
You may not realize this but Tom Hardy has been in this business for 10 years. His devilish stare, pouty lips, and British tongue have appeared in "Band of Brothers," Black Hawk Down, Star Trek: Nemesis, Layer Cake, Marie Antoinette, Sucker Punch, and RocknRolla. His breakout role was the title character of 2006's psychological prison drama Bronson. It was the first time he was on display, both physically and emotionally. The critics ate it up. His next project was Inception. He took a backseat to Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon Levitt, and Ellen Page, but by the trailer alone, audiences were already smitten with Hardy.

This year, he's built up incredible buzz for his family slash boxing slash war drama Warrior, opposite another breakout star Joel Edgerton. They were perfectly paired as brothers. They've managed to do what Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenneger only dreamed of doing: believably delivering a powerful and emotional performance even though they look like brawny meatheads. That's the most surprising aspect of Hardy's success. Because of the nature of his last few films, he's had to maintain this muscular build that's more customary for action films like heist and superhero films, not suspense thrillers and indie dramas. Audiences normally disregard such body-conscious actors as just part of the scenery, but I think Hardy's accent allows him to play both intellects and muscle. It allows him to melt into vulnerable characters, like the lovesick assassin in Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy.

Next year though Hardy will give himself over to commercialization, fighting over Reese Witherspoon in the action rom-com This Means War opposite Chris Pine, pairing up with Shia Labeouf in the crime drama The Wettest County, and then reteaming with Christopher Nolan in The Dark Knight Rises, the long-waited finale to the Batman saga, as Bane. He'll be under a mountain of scrutiny as he'll have to deliver a performance that's either equal to or better than the belated Heath Ledger's infamous Joker—all while wearing a muzzle. However, I have a feeling Hardy doesn't feel the pressure. That's half his appeal. He's super chill, like he never has a care in the world.

CRUSHWORTHY: Joshua Bowman from "Revenge"

2011-12-21T01:50:00.000-05:00

{DAY 21}
The Ladies Magnet // Joshua Bowman
I'll be honest, the only reason I'm posting this particular actor is because ALL of my friends think he's hot. I don't. He kind of looks Cro-Magnon to me, and at the same time too much of a pretty boy. But I can see the appeal. Viewers have discovered him on the ABC hit drama "Revenge" and the idea of falling for the rich, hot next door neighbor with a rebellious streak and a desire to stand up for what's right is very attractive. Career-wise, Bowman has yet to prove himself. And if it turns out that the supposedly dead body on the beach really is his character, then he won't get the longevity on the series that he requires to make a name for himself. Something tells me that he won't disappear off the face of the earth either way. Fans may not know this, but Bowman isn't just the viewers' choice but a frequent celebrity choice as well. He's been romantically linked to costars Cassie Scerbo ("Make It or Break It") and Miley Cyrus (upcoming So Undercover), and the late Amy Winehouse.

CRUSHWORTHY: Jake M. Johnson from "New Girl"

2011-12-20T11:48:00.003-05:00

{DAY 20}
The Wallflower // Jake M. Johnson
Jake is a pretty unassuming guy. You probably hardly noticed him in the untraditional love story Paper Heart as Charlyne Yi's documentary director and moral support. Yi and Michael Cera's quirky courting ritual was probably too distracting. But who knew that it would turn out to be perfect training for Jake's breakout role as the emotionally-reluctant anti-social Nick, who often wrangles and advises the quirky lead character on the new FOX series "New Girl"?

When we're first introduced to him, he's this blubbering mess that was recently dumped by his on-again-off-again girlfriend. You have to understand how annoying he was originally. I have a horrible memory. Especially when it comes to names. But he was SO annoying that I actually remember the name of the girl he repeatedly whined about for what seemed like an eternity but was only three episodes.

Post-Caroline (and inevitably pre-Jess) Nick is a lot less sensitive. In fact, I would go so far as to characterize him as standoffish. He refuses to participate in goofy pastimes or to accept apologies or assistance of any kind. He's like a grumpy old man. And it got worse when Paul (Justin Long), Jess's new boyfriend, entered the picture. Nick was the only one who didn't like him and had no legitimate reason for not liking him. Jess had to practically mine kindness out of him. And it appears she's wearing him down.

Jake does an impressive job of hinting at the subtle struggle Nick's having with trying not to fall for Jess, but he's about as ready to start something serious as she is. He also succeeds in occasionally acting as a window through which viewers perceive his roommates. One minute he's onboard with the gang and the next he's trying to distance himself from their weirdness. He's very good at getting a lot across with simple gestures and facial expressions. He's the kind of actor you have to watch more than listen to. Thankfully, he's easy on the eyes.

CRUSHWORTHY: Charlie Cox from "Boardwalk Empire"

2011-12-19T08:00:00.003-05:00

{DAY 19}
The Brit // Charlie Cox
I've seen Casanova and I've seen Stardust, and I have to be honest with you, Charlie Cox has never made that much of an impression on me. He's kind of cute and his skittish behavior was endearing, but not exactly leading man worthy. It would appear though that Cox is more of a character actor. He shines with meatier roles. And he found one in "Boardwalk Empire." Joining Scorsese's HBO series as the Irish assassin who becomes Nucky's new "driver" was the best career move he could've ever made. He may get five minutes of screen time per episode, but they are unforgettable minutes. His quiet confidence and straightforward approach to asking for what he wants—amidst a city full of people who beat around the bush—is chilling. Cox has obviously grown into his own as an actor, and just in time.

GIFT GUIDE: 2011 TV-Related Gifts

2011-12-19T00:47:00.005-05:00

Check out these awesome gifts for TV lovers:

CREDITS AFTER THE JUMP...

CBS

"How I Met Your Mother"

Silk Suitjama, $100
A reference to Barney's obsession with wearing suits.
The Bro Code by Barney Stinson, $11
Barney's bible of incredibly inappropriate mantras that he lives by.
Custom Paternity Test Onesie, $16
Let's be honest, Barney's been giving Lily the eye a little too much this season. And Bieber's just a little too charismatic for his own good.

"2 Broke Girls"

Custom "Broke Bitches" Apron, $16
Max would love this.

"Hawaii Five-O"

Custom Surfboard, $670
In honor of the pass time that both McGarrett and Kono wish they had more time for.

"Big Bang Theory"

"Soft Kitty" Women's T-shirt, $25
A reference to the ridiculous song that Sheldon makes Penny or his mom sing whenever he's sick.

NBC
"Chuck"
"Baby Awesome" Onesie
A reference to the child that Captain Awesome and Ellie Bartowski made.

"Community"

Greendale Community college "Go Human Beings" T-shirt, $26
A fake t-shirt from the fake school that has a creepy mascot and a dorky slogan.

"Friday Night Lights"

Panther Football T-shirt, $26
For those of you who have teary eyes, aching hearts, and have been stricken with loss. <--And most importantly anyone who got that.

"Late Night with Jimmy Fallon"

Thank You Notes by Jimmy Fallon, $12
Fallon's compilation of jokes that come from a Friday night segment where he pretends to write thank you notes that are actually goofy two-liners.
Late Night mug, $14
No one will judge you if you put beer in that mug as you watch your late night TV.

"Parks and Recreation"

Knope 2012 T-Shirt, $26
A reference to Leslie's ambitions to run for governor despite her serious lack of following.
Little Sebastian plush toy, $19
A commemorative toy for the small horse that died on the series and devastated the entire town.
Wood Carving Manual, $65, and Kit, $10
For the Ron Swanson fan who was inspired to take up whittling upon hearing about Ron's interest in it. (Also consider a lifetime supply of bacon, or any meat really, and a mustache growing kit.)

"The Office"

"Future Dunder Mifflin Employee" Onesie, $26
Because chances are that Dunder Mifflin will be around forever and what better place for your child to work at than somewhere where the bar is so low that even an alcoholic, a thief, an adulterer, a cat lover, a beet grower—yes those last two things are as bad as the previous—and a prankster can excel.

"Up All Night"

Diaper bag for dad from Gucci, $1790
It's rare that you see a stay-at-home dad, let alone one on TV, so it's only fair that such dads get a fairly masculine bag for which to carry such things as diapers, binkies, and breast milk. Doesn't have to be this expensive, but can you deny that it's gorgeous?

FOX

"Bones"

"King of the Lab" Lab Coat, $20
A reference to the phrase Hodgins shouts whenever he executes an awesome experiment that helps in an investigation and/or beats an intern to the punch.

"Glee"

Dalton uniform Shirt, $30
They may be rigidly formal little cherubs, but the all-boy private school that competed with the glee club last season has an undeniable style.

"New Girl"

Douchebag Jar, the price of a jar and a post-it
A reference to the jar that Schmidt's roommates forced him to contribute to in the beginning of the season whenever he said something incredibly inappropriate.
Native American Talking Stick, $30-50
A reference to the stick that Jess pulled out to get Nick to tell her how he felt about her accidentally seeing him naked, a method she uses in her classroom.
Classic Roller Skates, $28
A reference to the skates that Jess bought the boys for Christmas, which they put on as soon as they got them to her delight.

ABC

"Castle"

Tote bag, $18

"Cougar Town"

Large wine glass, $45 (set of 4)
A reference to the lushes who star in this series and re-appropriate giant glass objects as drinking apparatuses. That's how much wine they drink.

"Revenge"

Infinity engraved box, $25
A reference to the box that Emily keeps all of her secrets and the symbol that represents the bond she had with her father.

"Pan Am"

Pan Am luggage, $89
A relic from a time when stewardesses prided themselves on flying with style.

The CW

"The Secret Circle"

"The Nomad" Distressed Leather Journal, $70
All the witches in the coven have a cool leather-bound spell book. And just because magic doesn't exist doesn't mean your friend can't use an awesome-looking journal.

"The Vampire Diaries"

Elena/Rebekah's necklace, $70
The same way fans of "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer" flocked to jewelers to get their very own Claddagh ring, true fans of this series will cherish the necklace that started it all and can possibly end it.

MTV

"Awkward"

"Jenna Lives" T-shirt
"Make awkward sexual advances, not war." T-shirt, $17
"More Awkward Than Michael Cera" T-shirt, $25
The first shirt is a reference to Jenna's accident that people still believe was a suicide attempt. The rest are just clever uses of the word "awkward" that compliment the series quite well.

HBO

"Bored to Death"

Super Ray Comic T-shirt, $18
This is the superhero from Ray's penis-filled comic book. It's about as PG as the comic gets so your friend can sport his fan love without repelling women and children.

"How to Make It in America"

"New York City Eats Its Young" T-shirt, $25
This was one of their first designs that put them on the map. It speaks the truth. And whether your friend is a budding artist/entrepreneur or just a nose-to-the-grindstone New Yorker, they'll bear this mantra proudly.
Custom "Fuckin' Crisp" Embroidered Jeans
On the last episode of the season, the boys revealed their next project: jeans. This is for your cheeky (pun not intended), original friends who shop vintage to get one-of-a-kind goods.

"Game of Thrones"

Targaryen Ring, $35
I...don't watch this show. But people seem really enthusiastic about it, so I imagine a fan would be honored to rock this...3-headed dragon ring. (shrugs)

SYFY

"Eureka"

Population Sign, $60
This would be a lovely addition to frat house decor. A geek frat house, but still.
Global Dynamics Laptop Sleeve, $30
Global Dynamics is the company where all the scientists of Eureka make their discoveries. Encourage your nerdy friend every day with this constant reminder of his potential genius.

USA

"Psych"

Pineapple Cookie Jar, $35
There is apparently a pineapple in nearly every single episode of the series. Fans would love this inside joke.
Pineapple-Stamping Toaster, $40
Who wants regular toast anyway?

"Suits"

YSL Briefcase, $1,595
In the beginning of the series Mike looked like, well, he looked like a poser. It wasn't until Harvey took him under his wing and taught him how to dress and carry himself that he started to have the confidence to want more for himself. You have to dress the part for the life you want. It's pricey, but it's worth it.

CRUSHWORTHY: Chris Zylka from "The Secret Circle"

2011-12-18T22:20:00.000-05:00

{DAY 18}
The Bad Boy // Chris Zylka
When I first saw Zylka in the short-lived TV adaptation of "10 Things I Hate About You," I thought there was something a little off about him. He was playing this dopey, narcissistic pretty boy who was the most popular guy in school and therefore the object of everyone's obsession. As it turns out, Zylka's talents were being completely wasted as a nice and dimwitted character. It would appear he has a knack for playing the devious sort. It dawned on me when I saw him in "The Secret Circle" playing a treacherous witch-turned-witch-hunter. Despite the blonde hair and chiseled good looks, you could see the evil in his eyes as he plotted and schemed. He's the ultimate bad boy, because he hides in plain sight. I look forward to seeing Zylka as a bully in the upcoming The Amazing Spider-Man.

CRUSHWORTHY: Josh Dallas from "Once Upon a Time"

2011-12-17T19:56:00.000-05:00

{DAY 17}
Prince Charming // Josh Dallas
Casting the role of Prince Charming is a tricky task. The world isn't by any means made up of blonde, blue-eyed, statuesque, white men, for if it were, everyone would have a prince of their own. It's especially difficult to find someone who would fit seamlessly within the real world and the fantasy world. Alas, producers lucked out when they stumbled on newbie Dallas, who's captured the bravery and fearlessness of a knight, and the astonishing wonder of discovering a damsel in distress he falls madly in love with. Viewers of "Once Upon a Time" know that the prince's story is much more complicated than that, and that Dallas must not only play a prince and an amnesia patient, but also the prince's twin, a pauper forced to impersonate his brother and become the hero his kingdom needs him to be. From the moment we're introduced to his amnesiac persona, we were hooked on his tragic love story. Dallas has done very well to deliver three different, yet seamless, portrayals, making the ladies swoon for every one.

CRUSHWORTHY: Nick Wechsler from "Revenge"

2011-12-16T12:01:00.003-05:00

{DAY 16}
The Boy Next Door // Nick Wechsler
Last year, I spotted Wechsler on an episode of the since cancelled supernatural series "Past Life." It took a while for it to register that what raspily snarled before me was a grown up Kyle from "Roswell." I was astounded. There was a time when I found Wechsler to be the least attractive actor on a series (it went Brendan Fehr, Jason Behr, Colin Hanks, then Wechsler), and now he's the most—in my opinion anyway.

This year he was cast in ABC's hit melodrama "Revenge," playing the childhood crush/bff of the lead character, who's returned to her hometown to exact revenge on the people who framed her father for treason and damned her to the life of an orphaned outcast. His character has no idea that the girl he's been waiting for for the last 20 years is the new girl in town. And he's so desperate to have her back that he believes an imposter when she slithers into his life.

While Wechsler may still be playing second banana to the heartthrob, as his girl seduces her enemy's son, he's definitely The One this time. He's the only one who knows her for who she really is. He's the only one who can save her from herself. And he's the only one whose hands aren't mucked by greed or envy—for now. The series's opener suggested that the sweet, caring boy-next-door we've been seeing this entire season will one day murder his competition. Murderer or not, I look forward to the steamy scene of Amanda and Jack officially reuniting. A girl's gotta live vicariously.

CRUSHWORTHY: Kirk Acevedo from "Prime Suspect"

2011-12-15T11:41:00.000-05:00

{DAY 15}

The Tough Guy // Kirk Acevedo

This 40-year-old Brooklynite wasn't very popular when he publicly berated "Fringe" writers for killing his character Charlie off in 2009. But after releasing an apology for his gruff reaction, he returned to the series, as it appears he would've anyway, to reprise his role in the alternate universe.

Acevedo, however, didn't put all of his eggs in one basket again. While he still moonlights on the sci-fi thriller, he went out for pilot season and got cast in the short-lived NBC series "Prime Suspect" this year, where he played one of the misogynist cops.

I have to say 90% of Acevedo's appeal is his accent. He's practically an endangered species, preserved from the 90s. The other 10% is his deadpan delivery of smart ass lines. He was bred for police procedurals. Here's hoping he gets cast in another one soon.

CRUSHWORTHY: Ramon Rodriguez from "Charlie's Angels"

2011-12-14T11:32:00.000-05:00

{DAY 14}

The Latin Lover // Ramon Rodriguez

The 32-year-old Puerto Rican actor got his big break in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, where he played the loud mouth, self-important hacker who overreacted to nearly everything. His character was a bit grating and cowardly, and not in the least bit attractive. Two years later he costarred in the pro-Army alien action film Battle Los Angeles as a stern lieutenant who goes above and beyond for his squad. I don't know if it was the uniform or the acts of courage, but he started to look a lot more appealing.

That's why I wasn't too bummed when I heard he was cast as Bosley in the recently cancelled "Charlie's Angels" series revival. The idea of it was ridiculous, especially since even this generation is accustomed to an old white guy playing the part. However, making Bosley young and attractive added an episodic romantic element to the series, which it would need to retain its female viewership. Although even that couldn't save the series, I don't think we've seen the last of Rodriguez. With every role, he gets more and more intriguing.

CRUSHWORTHY: Jamie Dornan from "Once Upon a Time"

2011-12-13T17:09:00.001-05:00

{DAY 13}

The Dark Prince // Jamie Dornan

In spite of his gruff exterior on ABC's new series "Once Upon a Time," complete with scruffy beard and bad boy leather jacket, his character Sheriff Graham has a very docile demeanor. This weekend we learned that he was the infamous Huntsman who spared Snow White when he was sent to cut out her heart. Dornan was faced with the challenge of playing a conflicted soul, estranged to humans, beholden to the wolves who raised him, and in desperate need to feel something other than obligation. His story was heartbreaking, both figuratively and literally.

But that's not the reason he's Crushworthy. It has nothing to do with his performance or struggle, and everything to do with how exponentially hotter he gets with a beard and his Irish accent. His character bent the law for friends, slept with the enemy, and stole a kiss. The only reason viewers could forgive him so easily for his extremely recent transgressions is because of that brogue. Hell, he could probably get away with murder.

CRUSHWORTHY: Mike Vogel from "Pan Am"

2011-12-12T01:47:00.000-05:00

{DAY 12}
The Time Traveler // Mike Vogel
I had my doubts about Vogel from the start—and I'm not just talking about his latest role on ABC's "Pan Am," where he replaced an actor from the pilot. I didn't like him in the skateboard indie Grind in '03 or as "the hot soccer coach" in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants in '05, or even as an unsupportive best friend in 2010's She's Out of My League. It wasn't until this year that he finally started to grow on me. Turns out he was born in the wrong decade.

Despite his modern looks and habitual slacker roles, Vogel was born to play system-bucking gentlemen from a different decade. I got my first peek of his new-found self-confidence in this summer's adaptation of The Help. He had less than five minutes of screen time, but in it, the 32-year-old actor seemed reformed.

Landing the lead on "Pan Am" clinched it though. It was there that he finally got to show what he was capable of. That he could play the lover and the fighter, and not just a two-dimensional dud. That he could be a leading man. In a new era, Vogel's body language changes and he evolves into a daredevil charmer who fights as hard for his beliefs as he does for his lady. He almost makes you wish you could go back in time.

CRUSHWORTHY: Wilson Bethel from "Hart of Dixie"

2011-12-11T01:29:00.000-05:00

{DAY 11}
The Southern Comfort // Wilson Bethel
Let me just start by saying, I only watch "Hart of Dixie" for two reasons: to see whether Dr. Zoe Hart will choose Wade (Bethel) or George, and to kill time. The series is barely watchable. Too many of its plot lines seem like condescending, close-minded perceptions of how both people from the country and the city think and behave. Almost all of the characters are walking stereotypes and I'm not quite sure how a campaign to take it off the air hasn't been started yet by offended Southerners. Nonetheless, there's at least one bright star in this blackhole of talent, and that's Bethel.

When the series first began, he was a shirtless Country boy who was overly confident and inconsiderate. Everything about him said trouble, and the only reason viewers would root for him to win Zoe's heart is because of every woman's dormant desire to be swept away by a Bad Boy. The thing is though, once a girl gets a Bad Boy, they always want to mold him into "a better person." Wade, however, started changing just to get Zoe's attention. He went from a cocky playboy to a tongue-tied sweetheart, turning himself into a man she can love.

When an actor has such a transforming arc, it can sometimes be difficult for viewers to accept the transformation, given how believable they were as their original incarnation. But Bethel managed to make the transition seamless, almost like a rowdy redneck switch he turns off just to play a normal likable guy. Just what the doctor ordered. (Yup, I had to.)

CRUSHWORTHY: Callan McAuliffe

2011-12-10T01:02:00.000-05:00

{DAY 10}
The Young "Character Actor" //
Callan McAuliffe
Young Hollywood isn't exactly overflowing with fresh talent these days, especially ones with a Y-chromosome. If you're a young boy who wants to be famous at 16, you either kiss Disney's pinky ring or learn how to charm the Hello Kitty underwear off of preteen girls. Fortunately, hope is not lost yet.

Last year, a little indie called Flipped told a sweet young love story in a unique way—first from the boy's perspective and then the girl's—and most of the heightened emotions were narrated. It's a challenge for any actor to emote without words, let alone a teenager new to the industry, but McAuliffe captured the innate insecurities and cowardice that lie within a teenage boy, and did his part to illustrate just how young love can blossom and wither.

This Spring, he costarred in the adaptation of the alien epic I Am Number Four as the eager and loyal human to Alex Pettyfer's volatile and vulnerable alien. He could've easily have been just another precocious nuisance distracting viewers from the action and the romance, but he milked every scene he was in, with self-pity, desperation, and goofy self-confidence. By the end of the film, I was more impressed with him than I was of his costars.

Next year, the teenage Aussie will play a young Leonardo DiCaprio in the star-studded cast of The Great Gatsby adaptation, and an archangel in the adaptation of the epic poem Paradise Lost. The parts may be small but the films are getting bigger.