Once upon a time, there lived a boy named Ned who spent most of his days playing with his golden retriever in bright yellow daisy fields. Alas, unexpectedly, the poor pup gets hit by a truck right before Ned's eyes. He was so heartbroken by his best friend's demise that he was compelled to touch him one last time. Zap! His dog jumps right back up and into the field as though nothing had happened. It was right then that Ned knew he was no ordinary boy. But it wasn't until the day that his pie-loving, Susie-homemaker mom died that he realized how extraordinary he really was. Knowing his power, he immediately revived her. Unfortunately, he was unaware that when he reawakens the dead, someone nearby must take their place. And the victim of this poor fate was the father of the love of his life, Chuck (yes another one), as in Charlotte Charles. And even more unfortunate was when his mother kissed him good night and immediately died. For as much of a gift his touch was the first time was as much of a curse it was the second.
Ned and Chuck were bonded forever. Not only did their parents have their funerals on the same day, but on that day, they became each other's first kiss. Thus, he was cursed with the pains of death as well as the pains of love. So here are the terms of Ned's powers: If he brings someone back from the dead, he has 60 seconds before someone else dies. And if he chooses to keep them alive, he can never touch them again. That's right, no dog petting.
Due to his neverending guilt, Ned (Lee Pace from "Wonderfalls") never returned to the town his mother died in. Instead, he grew up to own a pie restaurant called The Pie Hole. Needless to say, he never mentioned his gift/curse to anyone, least of all to Chuck (Anna Friel from Timeline), who he never spoke to again. He feels guilty about being the cause of her father's death, kind of like Smallville's Clark feels bad about causing the death of Lana's parents with his catastrophic arrival. It wasn't until the night he heard a news report about a woman who was murdered on a cruise boat, a woman named Charlotte Charles, that he would meet her again. See, even though Ned never told anyone of his "gift," it did happen to come to someone's attention eventually. That someone is a private detective/bounty hunter named Emerson Cod (Chi McBride from "The Nine"), who has no sense of morals when it comes to collecting rewards for solving murder mysteries. How could you not get rich when you have someone who can raise the dead and ask them the name of their murderer?
Ned, however, is not as money-grubbing or opportunistic as Emerson. He's the kind of guy who would rather refer to the people he reawkens--not as zombies or the undead, but--as "alive again," because it's more humane. He's the kind of person who has seen so many dead people that even the most gruesome corpses barely phase him. He's so out of touch with normalcy that he's grown accustomed to petting his "alive again" dog with a back scratcher and ignoring beautiful blond women, like Olive (Kristin Chenoweth from "The West Wing"), who throw themselves at him. He's so beyond the regular prat falls of humanity that even though he and Emerson split the cut 50/50, the only time he really took advantage of his gift was the day he walked up to Chuck's coffin, pressed his index finger against her rosy cheek and gave her a second chance at life. So what do you do when the girl of your dreams tells you--knowing she only has 60 seconds of life left--that she would like her last moments and his last touch to be a kiss? Even more importantly, that the bearer of her first kiss be the bearer of her last?
A regular, hormonal, selfish guy would've kissed her and been done with it. But Ned had self control. Ned had the decency to give her a full second chance. What Ned didn't have was any more time left. So naturally the funeral director kicked it on the can (toilet). No worries though. He stole from the dead. At first you wonder if this was a wise decision. A romantic one, yes. Wise, hmmm? However, as you get to know Chuck and Ned more throughout the episode, you begin to understand that maybe they both deserved a second chance. Poor Chuck was left an orphan when her father died, to be cared for by two bizarro agoraphobic aunts, Vivian (Ellen Greene) and Lily (Swoosie Kurtz), who remind me of the Adam's Family (which is fitting since the show's director directed that film). Because of them, she never experienced life and the one time she does go out for an adventure, she dies. Like she says, "I suppose dying is as good excuse as any to start living." As for Ned, he's suffering from an internal and emotional agoraphobia. I believe he's never wanted to touch someone as much as he wants to touch Chuck (who I am going to start calling Charlotte because the overuse of that name is beginning to freak me out). He wants to touch her so much that when she needs a hug to calm her, he asks Emerson to give her one--and he does it reluctantly, being the cynic of the bunch. When they want to kiss each other they press the lips of two monkey statues together. And when they want to hold each others hands, they hold their own. They are seriously bringing a whole new meaning to unrequited love.
Now, you're probably wondering how long this relationship could possibly last. Well in the world of Barry Sonnenfeld, who executive produced the fairytale Lemony Snicket and directed the kitschy Addam's Family, I think their tolerance level is pretty high compared to ours. But how long can viewers last waiting for these two to finally "touch"? Hopefully they'll love the quirkiness of how these three solve cases. Not to say that asking the dead for answers has never been done, but it certainly hasn't been done like this.
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