TV Highlights: 30 Rock, Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, Life on Mars

LIFE ON MARS
Sam tried to get a priest/ex-boxer to give up a suspect and the man-of-the-cloth felt the need to say: "Be fair with him or I'll hit you with so many rights, you'll be begging for the left."

30 ROCK
• Jack gives Liz sleeping pills for a plane ride and these are the side effects: "dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime," which doesn't sound any worse than any other drug's side effects.
• Tracy was complaining about the hardships of a black man and told Jenna: "White people stole jazz, Rock n' Roll, Will Smith, and heart disease." Really? Will Smith?

GREY'S ANATOMY
• Meredith and Christina are enjoying all of her mother's journals, and Christina says: "They're like the Harry Potter books I never had."
• I'm glad someone finally yelled at them for fighting over surgeries. Dr. McBadass ripped Alex and Christina a new one when they argued about who was going to save a man that was coding. It's obvious that he values life more since the cases he's accustomed to are ones where wounds were inflicted by other humans and not by accident or through natural causes. It's taken quite the toll on him. When Christina caught him later in another one of his angry moods, she felt the need to tell him the story that ultimately influenced her to become a cardiothorasic surgeon. It turns out she was in a car accident with her dad when she was 9 and she held his chest together until the ambulance came, but in the end she felt as his heart stopped beating. Earlier Derek was complaing to McSteamy that Christina was hogging all of his time with Meredith, so he wanted him to seduce her. McSteamy was wary and Derek somehow ended up comparing her to something as treasured as a "single malt Scotch." But when McSteamy struck-out, he yelled that that there was no way she was a "single malt Scotch," which McBadass overheard. So after she told him that story and she left the room, he muttered "single malt Scotch," which I took to mean that he's starting to like her.

UGLY BETTY
• Wilhelmina grows frustrated with Daniel and his new bff Connor: "I will not constantly be over-ruled by two silly white boys."
• Connor tends to frazzle Wilhelmina and she ends up saluting him when he leaves her office. Mark says exasperated: "You haven't saluted anyone since Cheney."
• Glenn, Mark's boyfriend, asks him to move in and he hesitates. His hilarious defense: "It's like deciding to get a kid. How do you know it's the right time or what kind to get? I mean, do you go Russian, Chinese, or stay local and do something South American. And then what if you're wrong, and it clashes with your furniture?"
• Wilhelmina apologizes to Connor by saying: "I always blackmail people when I'm nervous--it's kind of my go-to."
• The episode was really about deceptive men. Betty was crushing on the musician she went out of her way to throw a fake Mode after-party for. Believing he would go out with her after she supported his band wasn't farfetched. She was sort of misled. He not only told her that she was beautiful and that she reminded him of a perfect snow day, but he wrote a song about her. Come on! So when she caught him making out with Amanda, I think she was right in feeling betrayed. Meanwhile, Wilhelmina was busy crushing on Connor, who showed several signs of having the hots for her: calling her beautiful, massaging her hand in a suggestive manner, and just being effortlessly dashing around the office. But it turned out that he is engaged. Then, of course, there's Mark's deception. He says he loves Glenn, but then he balks at moving in with him and cheats on him with some random douche at the party. Moral of this story: Boys suck.