FILM: Jessica Simpson's Blonde Ambition

Jessica Simpson's third movie, Blonde Ambition, has been in 8 theaters for a week now and has only grossed $1,322. Needless to say critics didn't even review it. The question is: Why? As in, why not release it only on DVD? Or, why not make it a made-for-TV film? Or, why not review this movie if you took the time to review Hot Rod, which was the worst Talladega Nights meets Napoleon Dynamite pile of crap I've ever seen?

Jessica's film wasn't actually that bad. I've seen much worse on Lifetime and ABC Family. It follows a small town girl who goes to the big city to surprise her model fiancee only to discover that he's cheating on her and has developed a massive ego. Luckily, one of her cousins (Rachel Leigh Cook, working her way back up after she peaked in She's All That) lives in the city and lets her crash. When she covers for her cousin on her bike messenger job, she stumbles upon a cute construction worker who turns out to be a mailroom guy played by Luke Wilson (who clearly needs some extra money). Two business executives capitalize on her clutziness and plant her in their company as the president's secretary so that she can get him fired. Of course, they assumed clutzy meant stupid, so they are blindsided by how helpful she actually is. I'm thinking you can guess what happens next.

The point is the concept of the movie isn't bad, because if it was, it would not have been made before and broadcasted on television channels all the time. It seems like critics and viewers are just over-criticizing Jessica because of who she is. I swear, she really isn't that bad of an actress. Since I've seen Dukes of Hazzard and Employee of the Month, I can assure you she's actually getting better. But that doesn't mean I'd recommend you find one of those 8 theaters and fork over $12.