Two words. Spider pig. The Simpsons did pretty damn good in their opening weekend. Who knew pig poop could get people to fork over $72 mil and the #1 spot. Romantic comedy No Reservations came in at #5 with $11 mil. Not so good for Catherine Zeta Jones' comeback. It got low grades all around from most critics. And the fact that the last film she completed, Death Defying Acts with Guy Pearce, hasn't even been given a release date doesn't bode well for her film future. But at least she didn't get skewered at the box office like amateur director Chris Siverston and writer Jeff Hammon for their poorly received attempt at a thriller, I know who killed me. It did make the top 10, coming in at #9 with $3.5 mil, but critics were more likely to touch Homer's toxic pig poop than spend five seconds entertaining the idea that Lindsay Lohan still had a future in this business. It's funny though. I just rewatched Parent Trap, where Lohan plays both twins, so I'm pretty sure she could pull off the dual personality role that this film demanded.
As for the rest of the top 10: I Now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry came in at #2, not crumbling under the pressure of bad reviews, which means that Adam Sandler managed to keep his fan base despite the controversial topic, and Kevin James succeeded in further solidifying his place in comic history. Hairspray still stuck around in the top 5 at #4 after rave reviews. And the only blockbusters left in the top ten are Transformers and Live Free or Die Hard.
But this weekend they will have major competition, as will Double O Doh!, when Bourne Ultimatum hits theaters like a ton of bricks. People of the Will Ferrell and Steve Carrell fan persuasion will be revved up for Hot Rod. The ladies will be gushing over Becoming Jane, yet another Jane Austen biopic/adaptation, where Anne Hathaway will be trying to drum up some Oscar street cred. My Hispanic peoples and J.Lo-enthusiasts will be bailando to the rhythm of El Cantante. Those pain in the ass kids who talk way too damn loud on the train, who've had cell phones since the womb, and refuse to speak in complete sentences (IDK my BFF Jill) will be tuned into Bratz! Boys, kids, and old school cartoon fanatics will most likely be donning their capes for Underdog. And for all you indie lovers, Paul Rudd will be shaming you with the comedy The Ten...as in commandments.
Doh! It's finally here. All you die hard Simpsons fans are getting exactly what you've been waiting for. The plot apparently revolves around toxic pig poop. Oh yeah! They are digging deep within their funny bones to give you the biggest and best laughs you've ever gotten. It is literally fun for the whole family. Enjoy.
No Reservations
In this Raising Helen-type remake, Catherine Zeta Jones gets hit pretty hard when her sister dies and she has to take care of her niece. Being a top chef, she already has enough on her plate. The grief has gotten to her so much that her boss and the customers are starting to question her culinary expertise. It isn't until she meets a care free chef (Aaron Eckhart) that she learns how to lighten up and communicate with her depressed niece, who ironically refuses to eat. One could argue that there's no way Eckhart could ever score a babe like Jones and there won't be any chemistry,but Eckhart does have charisma so we'll see. Zoe Kravitz, the daughter of rock star Lenny, makes her film debut as Abigail Breslin's nanny.In playing Jones' niece, Breslin continues on her quest to be the next Dakota Fanning--without turning irrelevant--and plays the heartbroken orphan so well Angelina might try to adopt her.
I Know Who Killed Me
I'm pretty sure you've had enough of Lindsay Lohan for one lifetime. But if by some chance you are immune to her insane behavior, here's the plot: A college student, Aubrey, has a class assignment revolving around the abduction of a stripper right before she is abducted and tortured by a serial killer. When she escapes and wakes up in the hospital, she's convinced she's the stripper and that Aubrey is still in danger. It's twisted and it's a plot cooked up by a first time writer. But it just might be interesting enough to make people want to find out what the truth is. I know my interest is peeked.
I know this summer has been jam-packed with action movies, but I'm always up for more. So here are a few trailers for films that range from action thriller to political action drama.
Rush Hour 3
Of all the sequels this summer, this is probably the one people were barely looking forward to and have already forgotten is on the way. But, Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker do make a good team and you're guaranteed at least great action sequences from Jackie. Not to mention, up and coming action stars are known for appearing in Rush Hour films: Ken Leung (X-Men 3), Zhang Ziyi (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon), and now Devon Aoki (Sin City). By the trailer, I can tell there are going to be a lot of references to the first film. ("You go this way, and I'll go that way.") But surely there will be more catch phrases to add to our pop culture repertoire by the end of the summer, especially since it takes place in Paris, which is a breeding ground for racist jokes. Release Date: Aug. 10th
War
There hasn't been that much press about this film, except for maybe the posters all over the city. However, any movie where British action star Jason Statham battles with any other martial arts expert is bound to at least be full of moments that'll have your eyes popping. His opponent for this film is Jet Li. It's funny, because from the trailer it seems like Li doesn't even get lines. But who's really going for the dialogue. Statham plays an FBI suit who's avenging his partner's murder, and Li plays the ass he's going to kick. I don't know if it's going to be very believable if he beats Li though. Even at the end of The One--which they starred in together--Li's character was just sent to a hell dimension instead of executed. Aside from all the testosterone, Nadine Velasquez ("My Name is Earl") makes her big screen debut and Devon Aoki (Sin City) mooches off of her Japanese heritage to woop some ass. This is, however, the director Philip G. Atwell's first feature film (not to mention the writers' as well). So if Velasquez and Atwell impress the critics they might have budding futures to look forward to. Release Date: August 24th
3:10 to Yuma
I'm not really a western kind of girl, but it's Christian Bale and Russell Crowe, who's on a combeback mission after his continuous flops (Master and Commander, Cinderella Man, and A Good Year). That just screams intrigue. In this tale, Crowe plays the leader of a gang of outlaws who rob and kill people. Bale plays a volunteer who helps the law bring him to a train station at Yuma, where he'll be taken to his execution. Despite the fact that Crowe's crew is doing everything in its power to kill all the officers and get their leader back, Bale ends up being the only one brave enough to keep going. Ben Foster (X-Men 3) plays Crowe's ruthless right hand man who'll burn men alive just to get him back. If you've seen Hostage, you know he's really good at being bad. Logan Lerman (The Number 23) plays Bale's son who stupidly follows his father on this journey and sees the good in Crowe. Something tells me he'll have to choose between saving his father and saving the outlaw. It stands to make a few bucks. Release Date: Sept. 7th
Eastern Promises
I literally tremble at the sight of a pissed off Viggo Mortensen (History of Violence). Watching him in his spot-on Russian accent reminds me that it's been a long time since I've seen someone portray a European in a cryptic light convincingly. Even the bad guy in Casino Royale was barely frightful. So, he crushed Bond's balls. Big deal. Mortensen manages to make your skin crawl with just one creepy look. Oh right...the plot. Mortensen plays the extremely violent muscle for a London crime family who's trying to cover up the death of a pregnant girl, and Naomi Watts plays a meddling midwife who is devoted to translating the girl's diary so she can find someone to take care of the baby. Unfortunately, the diary has a lot more than family names in it, and Vincent Cassel (Ocean's Twelve) and Armin Mueller-Stahl (The X-Files) plan on making sure no one every reads it. Cue the ominous music. Release date: September 14th
Hitman
After his critically acclaimed HBO series "Deadwood" was canceled, Timothy Olyphant stacked up a butt load of films to star in. He's done the romantic drama Catch and Release and the action film Live Free or Die Hard, and now he's playing Agent 47 in this thriller that may be mistaken for the comic by the same name but has no relation. The film follows a gun-for-hire who works for "The Agency." Throughout the film he has to dodge Interpol and the Russian military. Dougray Scott ("Desperate Housewives") and Robert Knepper ("Prison Break") are also in it. Expect a lot of strutting, shooting, and car chasing. Release Date: Oct. 12th
Gone Baby Gone
Ben Affleck hasn't exactly hit pay dirt since his Gigli flop with ex-fiance Jennifer Lopez, but he did get a lot of respect for his performance in Hollywoodland. So maybe the critics won't completely torch his directorial debut and second dip into the writer's field. Placing his little bro, Casey, in the leading man spot, he tells the story of two Boston cops and a street wise insider searching for a missing girl. It's an adaptation of Dennis Lehane's novel by the same name. I think the most interesting part of this formulaic kidnap-tragedy scenario is that two detectives (Ed Harris and Robert Wahlberg) are searching for her using the law and Casey is using the streets--which I think would be more effective. There's also an underlying conspiracy in the police bureau, which could add to the suspense. Morgan Freeman plays the voice of reason unsurprisingly. Meanwhile, Michelle Monaghan is Casey's supportive girlfriend (??). This would be her first notable drama. Both she and the Afflecks are going to have to step it up and take this genre into unchartered territory if they want to graduate from the B to the A list. Release Date: Oct. 19
Lions for Lambs Tom Cruise begins his campaign to finally get that whole winning an Oscar thing out of the way. In this drama, he plays a congressman who has to deal with the after effects of two army rangers suffering injuries behind enemy lines in Afghanistan. Meryl Streep plays the journalist who "made his career" and is challenging his positions on the war. Robert Redford plays a professor who uses the two rangers, his former students, to convince one (Andrew Garfield) to not throw away a good education. Garfield must be a pretty impressive actor if Redford chose him to act alongside him in one-on-one scenes. Michael Pena (Crash) and Derek Luke (Catch a Fire), who are guaranteed to deliver amazing performances, are also in the film, which should add to their already impressive resumes. Redford is directing for the first time in 7 years since The Legend of Bagger Vance, which bombed at the box office and was trashed by the critics. Matthew Michael Carnahan, a new writer hopeful who's also done Kingdom (Jennifer Garner, Jamie Foxx) and has two other films in the works, might help him out this time around. I'm interested in hearing the poetry behind the title. But will audiences rush the theaters and brush Cruise's celebrity status aside for two hours of gripping political debate? I guess that all depends on what publicity stunt he pulls the week before it opens. Release date: Nov. 9th
National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets
Nicolas Cage recoops from his box office flops Ghost Rider and Next to return to more familiar territory with the sequel to this 2004 hit. This time the political conspiracy surrounds the assassination of Abe Lincoln. The original cast returns along with the addition of Helen Mirren, who I believe plays his mother. It's the perfect way to spend the holiday season and celebrate the birth of Jesus...or you know entertain yourself while you're on that blessed two week vacay. Release Date: Dec. 21st
Vantage Point
I saw this trailer a couple of weeks ago and at first it reminded me of Mark Wahlberg's Shooter. The president makes a public speech--in this case in Salamanca, Spain--and gets shot down by a sniper, people are scattering, etcetera etcetera. The twist on this political action film is that it has that Babel/Crash effect of viewing the attempted assassination from different point of views and perspectives. Matthew Fox used up his "Lost"-hiatus very wisely, playing a secret service agent. Also adding cred to this thinking man's action thriller are Forest Whitaker, who plays a tourist who caught it on tape,Sigourney Weaver, who plays a TV producer watching from the control room, Dennis Quaid, who plays Fox's partner, William Hurt (Mr. Brooks), who plays the leader in the investigation, Zoe Saldana (Guess Who), who is a reporter on the scene, and Edgar Ramirez (Domino). I'm most interested in seeing French and Moroccan actor Said Taghmaoui (Three Kings), who predictably plays a suspected terrorist, get more face time since he's been in the business for 13 years and has barely gotten any critical acclaim. Although this is the director, Pete Travis', first feature film it looks like it might be a gripping tale. Release date: February 15, 2008 (happy valentine's??)
"Whatever you like" Nicole Scherzinger (Pussycat Dolls' lead singer) feat. T.I.
Nicole is doing a Fergie--producing a solo album with every intention of returning to the band/group that gave them their big break. Although Beyonce and Justin Timberlake both made this claim--ultimately ditching Destiny's Child and N'Sync--some artists, like Gwen Stefani--who is presently recording with No Doubt--really do keep their promises.
For Nicole's first solo single, she plays it safe making it a club track and keeping company with rapper T.I. After listening to it, I realized the only part that kept me interested was the beat, which is perfect for a night of carb-burning clubbing. But, she has to remember why girls like the Pussycat Dolls so much. They are the Las Vegas showgirls version of the Spice Girls. There has to be girl power, male ego-crushing, self-loving lyrics. It can't all be: "Me hot girl. Watch me gyrate." If you want to sell albums, you cater to women. If you want to sell magazines, you'll cater to men.
"The Way I Are" by Timbaland featuring Keri Hilson, D.O.E. & Sebastian
Timbaland's 3rd single off his sophomore album, Shock Value, has that Euro-techno/hip hop beat-infused feel that Justin Timberlake presented on his last album. It's a nice club song to sway to and sing along with. But its real appeal are the other acts featured on it: 25-year-old Keri Hilson sings on the chorus. Even though she kind of sounds like she has a Brit/Euro-Kylie Minogue accent in it, she's actually an Atlanta native with a background in singing, song writing (for 7 years), and producing with a team known as The Clutch. She's written for: Britney Spears, Fat Joe, Toni Braxton, Mary J. Blige, Usher, Ciara, the Pussycat Dolls, Diddy, Chingy, Kelly Rowland, Nicole Scherzinger (Pussycat Dolls), Lloyd Banks, and even Timbaland himself. He's signed her to his record label and they're working on her debut album. Even when he's working on his own career, Timba's still pimping other artists. He's already hooked Snoop Dogg, Ludacris, and of course Justin to collaborate with her on a few singles. To catch more sneak peaks of her sound, listen to two other tracks on Timba's album: "Miscommunication" and "Scream" (which also features Nicole Scherzinger).
One of the rappers on the track, Sebastian, is actually Timba's younger brother. He's rapped on tracks for Bubba Sparx and Magoo. No word on whether he'll be making his debut any time soon or if he's content in riding his big brother's coat tails.
Apparently seeing John Travolta in drag is a lot more off-putting than possibly seeing Kevin James (King of Queens) and Adam Sandler lock lips more than once. OR maybe Jessica Biel has more of a perverted fan base than we give her credit for. I Now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry made enough jokes to get to the number one spot with $35 mil. Meanwhile, Hairspray came in at #3 with $28 mil. Most of that was probably forked over by Zac Efron admirers.
As for the indies: Released in only 1o theaters in the U.S., Sunshine made an exceptional $235,000 and was even more profitable with $27 mil overseas. Although many critics belittled its formulaic and utterly predictable scifi plot, others applauded how well it managed to uphold the genre. Goya's Ghost--technically not an indie since it was released in more than 40 theaters--did not fair as well. It only produced $127,000 in the U.S. and around $6 mil abroad. It was probably due to poor advertising. The higher-ups on the critics ladder respect its endeavors and plot points, but overall the movie bombed in almost everyone's eyes.
Harry Potter may have only endured a slight slump because all of its fans were busy reading the 7th and final book. It did however get its hooks into the #2 spot and reach $207 mil. Transformers and Ratatouille are also sticking around in the top 5. Next week, I'm almost certain the list will be shaken around a bit. Once the buzz about Chuck and Larry and Hairspray settle, their second week should determine the public's opinion. And surely, the release of The Simpsons Movie will hurtle Ratatouille out of the top 5. But for your culinary thirst, brandishing a different kind of love story, Catherine Zeta Jones makes her belated return to the big screen after two years with Aaron Eckhart and Little Miss Sunshine's Abigail Breslin in No Reservations. But if you're looking for a little more thrill and A LOT more drama, then you'll probably throw a couple bucks towards Lindsay Lohan when her indie mystery I Know Who Killed Me hits theaters. Or maybe not.
Barnes & Nobles has a countdown clock on their website for the very moment when the book will go on sale.
So, to hold you over until then watch a 10-minute AOL clip where Danielle Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint interview each other. Radcliffe is his usual awkward self, Watson utters some surprising slang for a Brit, and Grint spends about a whole minute on the verge of tears as he reveals his deepest darkest fear.
Here are a couple more interviews on their publicity tour: Emma on David Letterman Emma on Regis and Kelly Daniel on Regis and Kelly Daniel with Chuck the Movie Guy Rupert in an on set interview Rupert on CW11 Evanna Lynch (Luna Lovegood) in an on set interview Also check out the new looks of the supporting cast in this Sky News interview, where Bonnie Wright (Ginny) looks much more mature with razored bangs and hoop earrings to play Harry's love interest in the next film, Matthew Lewis (Neville) is sporting a goatee and an understated overbite, and Katie Leung (Cho) nervously answers the question about kissing Harry Potter.
Then, check out the trailer below for an indie that Radcliffe did earlier this year where he plays yet another orphan. This time, however, he's got some company. A nun decides to send all the boys whose birthday is in December on a little trip. Secretly hoping the boys will be adopted, the church sends them to stay with a couple. In this coming of age story, Radcliffe's character explores the opposite sex and learns that even though he doesn't have parents, he still has a family.
I bet you've heard a lot about this musical, except maybe the plot--no, it's not about hairspray. The title is a reference to what allows lead Tracy Turnblad (Nikki Blonsky) to have the confidence to go after the hottest guy in school, Link Larkin (Zac Efron)--even though she isn't "perfect" like Amber Von Tussell (Brittany Snow)--and to stand up against discrimination on a local TV dance show, The Corny Collins Show, which is like the Pleasantville version of Soul Train. It's a pretty strong subject for a happy-go-lucky musical, but I've seen the play and they know how to even it out so it isn't just an after school special for racists. Most people will forgo reading the plot and just rush the theaters to see High School Musical mogul Efron, John Travolta in drag, Queen Latifah stretching those Chicago-vet vocals, and Michelle Pfeiffer making her official comeback after four years and redeeming herself in the eyes of the musical Gods after her Grease 2 debacle. I, personally, just want to see if Hollywood has struck up a new trend: Hiring amateur actors, like Jennifer Hudson, to lead a movie and discovering that they're better than the professionals. If so, Blonsky just might have a charmed future.
I Now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry
Like I said earlier this week, this is going to be a hard sell to a majority of moviegoers. On the one hand you have the guys who worship Adam Sandler for all of his misogynist shenanigans and on that same sticky hand you have the guys who have swimsuit-wearing Jessica Biel wallpapered onto their bathrooms. Meanwhile, on the other hand, you have guys who won't even endure the mere mention of homosexuality or gay marriage just to see the sexiest woman alive and laugh at a legend in the making. And coupled with its difficult appeal, there's the fact that I've seen the trailer at least 10 times in theaters and it wasn't even funny the first time. They say they've screened the film for gay organizations and that the gays weren't offended, but I think beating the same joke over and over again--act girly, snap your fingers, swivel your neck, and roll your eyes--is exploiting too many stereotypes for me. Big Daddy was way more of a genuine, unique take on a tired topic. Hopefully, the work of screenwriter Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor (Sideways and About Schmidt) will liven it up and hit the right dramatic notes.
Sunshine
This is a scifi thriller about a group of astronauts who are given the mission to reignite the sun. Cillian Murphy (Batman Begins), Michelle Yeoh (Memoirs of a Geisha), and Chris Evans (Fantastic Four) are the most notable cast members. Two up and comers in the film are Rose Byrne (28 Weeks Later), who will appear on a miniseries soon called "Damages" with Glenn Close, and Hiroyuki Sanada, who will be in Rush Hour 3 and Speed Racer. The director, Danny Boyle, has a pretty good record after his work on Trainspotting and 28 Days Later. However, the writer, Alex Garland, has a very short resume and his first credit is Leonardo DiCaprio's The Beach, which I, and several other critics, absolutely hated! But then he redeemed himself two years later with 28 Days Later and has been recently tapped to write for video-game-turned-action movie Halo. So if you want a possibly good action indie, skip the musical and Brokeback comedy, and check out this geek thriller.
Goya's Ghosts
In this indie drama, Javier Bardem and Natalie Portman play crucial parts in the story of the painter Francis Goya. Portman plays Goya's muse during the Spanish Inquisition. She's arrested by the church and Bardem is her only salvation. It looks better than most period pieces that have been released of late. But if you're not all that interested in art, the Inquisition, or Padme sans the buns, then maybe you might want to see Bardem in action. He's been getting a lot of attention lately for his Oscar-worthy performance in No Country for Old Men. They're even considering him for the lead in the Pablo Escobar biopic that "Entourage" is fueling with their Medellin trailers.
I've always respected Eve for her ability to cross over genres and mediums and still deliver. This Latino-laced beat matched with a sultry hook from the Reggae rapper Sean Paul is a late summer single entry that'll be on replay on my iPod and hopefully the clubs when I hit Miami early August. Can't wait for the album, Here I Am, to drop onto iTunes for maximum downloading. Word is that it's been pushed to be released on Sept. 11th (an odd and ill-advised choice). But, unlike Britney's several delays, I feel like Eve is only postponing because artists are becoming more interested in collaborating with her after hearing her new stuff. Rumors state that Shakira, Adam Levine, and Gwen Stefani, her punk pop favorite, are already signed on to lay down vocals. She's working with producers like Swizz Beatz, Timbaland, The Neptunes, and Scott Storch. It'll be quite the comeback.
Check out her collabo with Maroon 5 during their live performance at MTV:
You don't really have to read this to know that Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is #1 this weeekend, making $77 mil at the box office--$140 mil since Tuesday. Meanwhile, people have finally recovered from the spell that Elisha Cuthbert cast on them. Captivity came in at #12 with $1.5 mil. Rescue Dawn, which got rave reviews from the New York Times, Newsday, and Ebert & Roeper, only made half a million dollars, even though it was released in 38 theaters--more than most indies. What it lacks in proceeds, it'll gain in Oscar noms. Talk to me, which was released in about the same amount of theaters, only made a quarter million dollars. However, Interview, which was only released in 6 theaters, made about $40,000, and the French indie, My Best Friend, which was released in 3 theaters, made $45,000.
Meanwhile, Transformers sticks to #2, grossing $222 mil--already surpassing their $159 mil budget. Francofiles, Rachel Ray-lovers, and people who've never seen a rat up close and personal, are keeping Ratatouille in the top 5 at #3, grossing $143 mil. Live Free or Die Hard is at #4 with $102 mil. And despite bad reviews License to Wed stuck it out at #5, grossing $30 mil.
I don't really think next week's releases will beat out Harry Potter for the top spot. But Hairspray has a fair shot at the top 5. I Now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry is going to have a bit of trouble getting macho guys to watch men even just pretend to be gay, but maybe Jessica Biel will have them rushing the theater. I think it'll surely bump License to Wed out of the romantic comedy top spot. The indies Sunshine (Cilian Murphy and Chris Evans) and Goya's Ghost (Natalie Portman and Javier Bardem) haven't gotten much press, but I guess the reviews will determine their fate.
Apparently we may have set off the apocalypse by buying tickets for Dreamgirls and Chicago, watching High School Musical repeatedly, and pre-ordering tickets for Hairspray. Because of our overzealous enthusiasm, Zac Efron has been tapped to star in the remake of Footloose (1984). It was a teen drama where a city kid moves to the only town on the planet that bans rock music and dancing--you know, because it makes kids want to have sex. Kevin Bacon's character rebels against their crappy law, tries to seduce the preacher's daughter, and teaches a meathead how to dance in order to woo a girl. It's no Gone with the Wind, but at the time it was one of many 80s statements against a controlling system. So if you loved it as much as I did back then and you watch it everytime it comes on TBS, then brace yourself. Not only are they going to ruin the only film anyone remembers Bacon for, but they're going to make it a full-blown musical.
I'm not that invested in Efron's career--not as much as I was when he was much more low key and less flamboyant on "Summerland"--but really...how many musicals must you do before they formally induct you into gay society?
He should play a handicapped mute in his next film--no singing, no dancing. Then maybe he won't go down in history as that kid who did all those musicals. Who knows? Maybe after being on set with John Travolta, the original musical/music-driven film king (Grease, Saturday Night Fever, Staying Alive), he decided to emulate his career path. Which basically means that a couple decades from now he'll be right back where he started, except...without any balls.
Harry mania officially begins today as the fifth installment of the wonderful wizard's journey hits theaters. A lot of my friends are renting the Goblet of Fire and skimming the Phoenix book to remind themselves of where Harry left off and what amazing events will happen in this film. All I can seem to remember off the top of my head is that Harry and his friends create a secret organization of their own in order to practice methods that'll protect them against the dark arts and he goes searching for a prophecy in a room filled with orbs. Everything else is a blur. But from the trailer you can surmise that there will be an encounter with...He who must not be named, Dolores Umbridge will be a psychotic pain in the ass, more Death Eaters, like Bellatrix Lestrange, will come out of the woodworks, and Harry's going to get laid the PG-13 way. But we'll also meet Luna Lovegood, a girl who makes Neville Longbottom seem cool, and learn the reason for Snape's hatred towards Harry. I trust that this will be a hectic 2hrs 18 min adventure.
Captivity
For some reason, people keep handing lead roles to Elisha Cuthbert (House of Wax). True, she does have a very convincing terrified look perfected. But after a while, it's just going to seem like she's playing the same person with a different affliction. Larry Cohen, who wrote Cellular and Phone Booth will be providing yet another kidnap-horror scenario. In this horror thriller, Cuthbert plays a model who is kidnapped and tortured by a man who's psychologically taunting her with her childhood fears. Her only way out is to get help from a fellow captive (Daniel Gillies of Bride & Prejudice). Our only way out of ever having to watch her make weepy eyes at the camera again is to collectively reject it so it doesn't gross any mula.
Rescue Dawn
Leading the indies is Werner Herzog, the German director of Grizzly Man, who was adamant about telling the true story of a U.S. fighter pilot trapped on foreign soil during the Vietnam War. He directed the documentary, but knew that it needed to be dramatized in order for its message to be seen. Oscar buzz is already ringing in the ears of Christian Bale (Prestige) and Steve Zahn (Sahara) for their heart wrenching performance of desperation and hopelessness in a time of war. If Evening failed to make your eyes well up, then this will surely soak your sleeve.
Talk to Me
This is the second most talked about indie coming out this Friday. Don Cheadle (Ocean's Thirteen) stars in this biopic about a hilarious and controversial D.C. radio personality Ralph "Petey" Greene. He's known for not only "telling it like it is," but telling it like it should be, how it could be, and what it used to be. Jabbing at politics, society, and racism, he was a soulful 60s activist. Chiwetel Ejiofor (Children of Men) is the guy who hands him the mike and allows him to be the voice for black people, while Martin Sheen (The Departed) plays "The Man"--you know, the white man. From the trailer you can tell that this film will make you giddy with laughter and agitated with disdain for discrimination and censorship. Go to the movies and get inspired.
Interview
Steve Buscemi (The Island), or as some would like to call him Mr. Pink from Reservoir Dogs, has always been a part-time director. He directed somewhat well-received Trees Lounge (1996), impressively dramatic Willem Dafoe (Spiderman) drama Animal Factory (2000), and the truly depressing and semi-well received Casey Affleck-Liv Tyler dramedy Lonesome Jim (2005). Interview is his third writing experience. With his other films, critics focused mainly on his ability to direct and construct an interesting story, but this one is basically an hour of dialogue that needs to be killer so it doesn't sink into irrelevance. Sienna Miller plays his "sparring" partner. She hasn't gotten many parts aside from the pretty-face role, so this might finally allow her to wiggle out of that slot they've pegged her into.
My Best Friend
This is a quirky French comedy about a guy who is challenged to make one friend since he was brashly informed by his business partner that he doesn't have any. He gets a taxi driver to pretend to be his friend and ultimately teach him how to socialize. It's a cute regression into adolescent mentality. It'll definitely give you a few laughs.
I celebrated Independence "week" by watching a crap load of movies. I caught Tranformers on the day of the 4th and was satisfied with what I got. I wasn't expecting much because I am, unfortunately, not a true Tranformers fan. My brother had Optimus Prime when we were little and I transformed him until the paint chipped off. But I wasn't as gun-ho as some people may have been. I, admittedly, was more interested in riding the Shia Labeouf wave to see if he'd scored himself another hit. While the action was nothing you could've ever imagined and the dialogue was as best as could be expected from an action film, I'd have to say that--besides Shia's innate ability to charm his way into people's hearts--the movement of the robots in mid-air, swerving and nose-diving while tranforming was the real eye candy. I practically got a sugar rush.
My beef with the film circles around three issues: One, I get that these are robots and they have to sound rigid, but it seemed so outdated. Two, the cube that they searched for may have been pretty awesomely designed, but they really couldn't have thought of a cooler name than the Energon cube. Really? Lastly, I literally could not see any facial features on the Decepticons for the first half of the entire film. They just looked like bulldozers that could speak. A grimace is essential to a villain's rep. Even Darth Vader--sans face--had a grimace. Despite the fact that I would recommend Live Free or Die Hard over Transformers, I wouldn't recommend ignoring it completely. Transformer fan or not, you will worship the Autobots in the end.
Then I saw Shooter with Mark Wahlberg, who I--without shame--lust after whole heartedly. The film is about a plot to kill the president that Mark's character is hired to prevent, but in actuality is framed for constructing. It was--what they call in Hollywood--easy money. Spout a view self-righteous lines, hunt down a couple of immoral sons of bitches, and go home with a fat check. I have to say that the lumberjack look does Mark's body good. However, the people that stood out the most were Michael Pena (Crash), Lane Garrison ("Prison Break") and Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon). Pena continues to amaze me, going from a hard working vato in Paul Haggis' amazing drama to several stints in critically acclaimed films like Million Dollar Baby, Babel, and World Trade Center. In this film he masters the art of the bumbling idiot who gets by on pure luck. He is Mark's "sidekick"--never confident, poorly trained, and underprepared. However, he did make up for Mark's inability to investigate. Unlike Justin Long in Live Free or Die Hard, he had a pair and he pulled them out when necessary. Garrison was only in the first few minutes of the film, but in them he convincingly faked an accent and made you forget about the deluded and misguided "gangsta" Tweener that he played on Fox. Glover was very good at being bad and, I dare say, he should do it more often. So if you want an easy popcorn flick with not much dialogue, but plenty of fury-filled fight scenes, then plant this sucker on your netflix queue.
I wasn't planning on seeing Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer in theaters, because the first film didn't wow me enough to pry the eight bucks out of my hand again. So, I was overjoyed when my dad woke me up at 10am to go watch it on his dime. What can I say? It's funny that critics believe no one will watch A Mighty Heart because Angelina Jolie is practically putting on black face to portray a minority, but no one seems to care that Mexican Jessica Alba is rocking blond hair and blue eyes to play a white girl. Maybe that's because everyone actually went to see the Silver Surfer. I've seen the comics and I was pretty impressed with the sleek and shiny bad ass. They not only improved the action--Johnny switching powers with all of them was the best part--but they improved the story line.
Of course, there were still moments that were sort of juvenile, like Johnny's sudden interest in settling down. They started off nicely, giving him a girl who wouldn't really give him the time of day. But then she succumbed so easily that it was sort of ingenuine. And the fact that Thing gets to be human--not once but twice--and doesn't use that opportunity to make love to his girlfriend is just plain ridiculous. The relationship between Mr. Fantastic and Sue Storm progressed appropriately, but there should've been way more tension between him and Dr. Doom, who was infatuated with Sue in the last film. I think, ultimately, they leave it open for a sequel once again. But if they return, they better bring a bigger bad ass than Dr. Doom. He was less kitschy than last time, but there's only so many instances where I'll buy the idea that a guy who shoots electricity from his arms is completely unbeatable by a woman who can create a force field inside your body and blow you up, a guy who can crush your bones, or a guy who's body turns as hot as the sun. Please.
Driving Lessons, with Rupert Grint, came out this Tuesday--a convenient week right before Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is released in theaters. This was Jeremy Brock's directorial debut. He wrote this story about a kid who grows up in a household where his so called religious mother pretends to take him on driving lessons and actually makes him park outside her lover's house while she has an affair, and his priest father just takes all of her crap. She forces him to get a job so they can support an old man she's graciously adopted and he ends up escorting an ex-actress around the country--most of the time unwillingly. I, like many other people, rented it to see if Grint had more range than playing a perpetually terrified sidekick to good old Harry Potter. First off, you have to consider that most British coming of age films involve the lead male character being very silent and pensive, as though the world was on his shoulders. That put aside, with what dialogue he was given, Grint didn't do half bad--especially during his brief bursts of rage towards anyone who pushed him to the limit.
Laura Linney played his mother in the Desperate Housewives-Brie fashion--completely insane, but with such devout self-righteousness it's hard to not do what she says. Julie Walters plays the older woman who, in one summer, manages to awaken the man within him--not like that. She also plays his mother in Harry Potter, so it was interesting to see her have much more lines and possessing such irresponsible determination. Most of the story line is predictable. But Grint still manages to surprise you in the end. That's right. You actually get to hear Ron Weasley curse some one out.
Then I saw Flyboys with James Franco. The only film that I've ever seen James Franco prominently featured in was Spiderman. So after watching the trailer to this WWI patriotic drama about the country's first fighter pilots and seeing the amazing aerial combat, I knew I was at least going to rent it. It's your basic brotherly love, casualties of war, fall in love on the battlefield kind of war drama. What really makes it worth watching--as it is usually with these films--is the comradery that you begin to join in on as they continuously try to shoot the Germans out of the sky for every one of theirs that gets killed. The vendettas that are forged, however, aren't as strong as the love between pilots. However, I have to say my jaw dropped once all scores were settled.
Oh Shia! It seems he's on a winning streak. First Disturbia, then Surf's Up, and now Transformers hits theaters with a bang. Taking the number one spot, the Autobots and Decepticons reel in $68 mil this weekend, grossing $152 mil since Tuesday and already surpassing their $150 mil budget. License to Wed has been riddled with bad reviews all week and although it made the #4 spot, it only made $10 mil ($17 mil altogether), which is horrible for a Robin Williams' comedy. The indie Introducing the Dwights, having only been released in 4 theaters, made a measly $15,ooo. But it faired better in the foreign box office, making over a quarter million dollars.
Ratatouille came in at #2, taking a backseat to Transformers, grossing $30 mil. Live Free or Die Hard is still holding strong in the 3rd spot. And Evan Almighty is still trekking along in the #5 spot. Pirates is officially out of the running and now Ocean's Thirteen is at #10 about to drop off. Next week we've got four indies, a horror flick, and the fifth Harry Potter film, which hits theaters early this Wednesday.
I saw Transformers Tuesday afternoon, like thousands of other people who brought the films proceeds to $36 mil in 36 hours. But within the first 15 minutes of the screening--in which the trailers take place--the audience was already perplexed. Normally there are three things that are required of a trailer: an idea of the plot, the release date, and the title. They may appear in any order they'd like. But they must appear. One of the trailers started as a video camera-perspective of a going-away party. When an earthquake-sensation is felt, the people migrate to the roof of the building to see what's going on. They spot explosions, hear roars, and withstand more tremors. When fire balls start crash landing all over the place, the people bum rush the exit. The videographer bobs and weaves, tumbles down stairs, and makes it out onto the sidewalk where—as someone's screaming "Oh my god! Oh my god!"—he's nearly crushed by...the Statue of Liberty's head. If reading this makes you want to know what this movie is called, then you can imagine the audience was even more interested. (However, after watching Transformers, it's understandable if they'd all forgotten about it.)
Allow me to demystify it for you. This is a J.J. Abrams project. He's written Armageddon, "Felicity," "Alias," Mission Impossible 3, and "Lost." Not to mention, he's producing Star Trek. Great things erupt from this man's mind. He's a master at building suspense, so it's no surprise that he'd withhold the title. However, industry insiders have heard the film referred to as both Cloverfield and The Parasite. As for the plot: Imdb.com has a sliver of information that merely states that it will be completely shot from the grainy and realistic perspective of a videographer. Perhaps Abrams is attempting to bring Alfonso Cuarón's (Children of Men) guerilla hand held style to the next level or maybe he's making a statement about the compulsion that humans have to record everything in times of disaster, i.e. 9/11, a day that bears a striking resemblance to the youtube clip above. And since Abrams' project is devoid of a title, he cleverly used the release date as the website: www.1-18-08.com. However, on the web page there's nothing but a single image of terrified onlookers. Assumed to be "just another Godzilla-type film," I think it's safe to say Abrams will deliver much more than that.
Although Perez Hilton is no longer impressed with Beyonce and her divaness, after watching this video, she's at least won me back as a fan. This song is the perfect summer song. There are two factors that determine this status: 1) Danceable. 2) Involves dance instructions in the song.LOL I know it's kind of juvenile, but it's still true. Almost every dance move in this video is a throwback to another decade, from the 60s to the 90s. You could lose weight just watching this video, imagine if you joined in...of course, in the privacy of your own bedroom; not at the office.
And for all you Destiny's Child fans, there's a mini-reunion in the video for old times sake.
Just a few weeks ago we were introduced to 18-year-old Brooklyn rapper Lil' Mama and now AOL Music is featuring 14-year-old Bronx-native Tiffany Evans. You may have seen her in Tyler Perry's A Diary of a Mad Black Woman, but by the end of the summer you'll know her as the next Rihanna. From the vibrant wardrobe to the asymmetrical hairstyle to even an Akon-produced collaboration with Rihanna on her upcoming album, Evans is definitely taking a page out of the Barbadian sensation's handbook.
There's so much confidence in her future success and her singing abilities that she's already recorded songs with Ciara, Timbaland, Beyonce, and even Lil' Mama herself. Check out her vocals on the track below.
What has been thought of as the template for action films headlined by tough guys with badges, has once again lived up to its legendary status. Every stunt had jaws dropping, bodies flinching, and catcalls escaping from shocked viewers. McClane's blue-collar, philosophical banter and gut busting laughs reminded us of a familiar hero. Rugged and worn, Bruce Willis successfully revived a character he hadn't portrayed in 12 years, presenting him in the very manner we expected him to appear. He graciously fit snug in the position of the old guy who not only schools you on the benefits of outdated and low tech resources, but makes the Terminator look like a geek. Speaking of which, this film was crawling with Star Trek loving, pocket protector owning, basement dwelling dorks, cleverly including the underdog that McClane usually alienates. Justin Long provided the perfect yin to his yang.
However, there were a few too many instances where Long acted as the proverbial "yes man," constantly in awe of Willis, uttering phrases the audience was thinking, like "Did you see that?," which McClane responds with "Yeah I saw it. I did it." Action movie dialogue is never usually ingenious, but this was just an insult to our intelligence. Die Hard, the first of the films, was originally immortalized by McClane's profane, but catchy, tagline, "Yippee kayay motha f*cka." Unfortunately, despite McClane's constant sarcasm and belittling comments, even in this film no other one-liner moments could top the one in which he reuses his old favorite. (I have to say it's the best non-CGI stunt he's ever done.) The only line of the film that has the biggest shot of going down in action movie history is a response to Long's exclamation of: "You just killed a helicopter with a car," in which McClane responds with: "I was out of bullets."
Of the rest of the supporting cast, there are six important characters. The bad guy, Timothy Olyphant (Catch and Release), tried his best to beat the villains of Die Hard's past. But as far as I'm concerned Alan Rickman (Harry Potter) will always be the most memorable. He was a slimy, European know-it-all with just as many good one-liners as McClane. He was a worthy opponent, while Olyphant was just a pretty boy throwing a hissy fit. Jonathan Sadowski acts as Olyphant's go-to hacker. After playing a meticulously groomed gay guy in She's the Man, it was interesting to see Sadowski forfeit a possible career in selling his body like Jesse Metcalfe ("Desperate Housewives") for a more rolled-out-of-bed, never-showered look. Maggie Q (Mission Impossible 3) played Olyphant's bad ass girlfriend who was stereotypically Asian. Not only did she know ka-ra-tay, but she knew her way around the world wide web without breaking a sweat. She didn't do so bad for what I believe to be Willis' first female opponent. But his real competition was obvious to anyone who's seen the French action film District B-13. Cyril Raffaelli is an amazing French stunt coordinator who's skilled in karate, wushu, and parkour. The moment I recognized him I knew his fight with Willis was going to be sick. Hopefully, this'll jump start his foray into more American action films. And just to clarify (since my bff was mistaken), he doesn't use wires.
Holding up the girl power end would be McClane's spitfire daughter, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who unsurprisingly learned a few things from good old dad. She could definitely dodge being pegged as the girl-next-door if she keeps going after roles like this. Lastly, the most unexpected cameo came from Kevin Smith, who obviously has been taking commercial parts (Catch and Release and TMNT) just to fund future personal projects (Red State, etc.). Nonetheless, he amps the geek factor to a comfortable level to balance all the testosterone that Willis shells out. I have to warn you. If you have a crush on Long, you might lose some respect for him, since his part literally could've been played by a girl.
Now, what makes a good film must always be determined by three factors: 1) Will you recommend it to your friends (and therefore admit that you actually saw it)? 2) Would you want to see a sequel (or are secretly dying for one)? 3) Would you watch it again (until the DVD starts to skip)?
And my answers to these questions are: 1) I'll only recommend it to Die Hard fans who love McClane. 2) I'd only want to see a sequel if Long, Winstead, and McClane's son--who was given the shaft in this installment--are brought into the mix. 3) Those stunts most definitely deserve a couple replays.
John McClane just had his ass handed to him by a rat...a French rat. Ratatouille made $47 mil taking the #1 spot, while Live Free or Die Hard rode its way to #2 with $33 mil. Sicko, which was scrutinized for Michael Moore's50% profit take, came in at #9 with $4.5 mil and Evening, which got mixed reviews, squeezed in at #10 with $3.5 mil.
Evan Almighty must've faired well on the grapevine since it stuck around at #3. But it only raked in $15 mil in its 2nd week, accumulating $69 mil so far, which barely puts a dent in its $175 mil budget. Meanwhile, John Cusack's horror flick 1408--the only scary movie in the box office--has grossed $40 mil at #4.
As for the blockbusters, Shrek the Third has finally bowed out of the top 10 after seven weeks at a deafening $313 million mark. Pirates seems to be the next one to go, teetering at #8. It's been 6 weeks and it hasn't even finished gaining back how much it spent on making the film ($300 mil), which could affect the possiblity of sequels. Ocean's Thirteen just cleared its budget at #7 with $102 mil. Fantastic Four looks like it fares better to make a huge profit. It's only been three weeks, they're at #5, and with $114 mil they just need $15 mil more to get some change in their pocket.
BUT...will Transformers, arriving in theaters the day before the Fourth of July, kick it to the curb and shake things up? With Shia "can't-do-no-wrong" Labeouf at the helm, hot girl Megan Fox heating up the screen, and eye-candies Josh Duhamel and Tyrese Gibson shelling out one-liners while frantically shooting alien robots, this is sure to be a blow out. And if it isn't, they'll definitely regret that $150 mil budget they handed over to Michael Bay. Transformers isn't the only film taking advantage of the Fourth of July "weekend":
License to Wed
Out in theaters July 3rd, this relationship comedy is about two 20 years old (Mandy Moore and John Krasinski) looking to get hitched to one another. But they find a few obstacles along the way, mainly presented by their overprotective reverend (Robin Williams). Although the script was written by a bunch of newbies, you can always count on Williams to provide a couple dozen belly laughs, and with Krasinski ("The Office") at his side there's bound to be slapstick galore.
Introducing the Dwights
And for you indie lovers, here's a comedy about a 20-year-old (Richard Wilson) trying to have a sexual awakening without any interference from his nutty and intrusive mother. This movie honestly makes you feel like your family is pretty friggin normal.
