Summer isn't officially over until Gossip Girl announces it. And what marked the end this time? Why the official start of Blair and Chuck's mature relationship, of course.
Keeping it fresh for us ADD-stricken drama-lovers, Blair and Chuck spent the summer role-playing. Blair would pick out some flirtatious strumpet for Chuck to seduce, and then she'd swoop in to play the scorned woman just so they could feed off the adrenaline of the moment when they took a roll in the hay. Of course, B eventually got too jealous after Serena planted thoughts in her mind, and she started doubting him. I love the part when she justified her suspicions of his infidelity by saying: "You're Chuck Bass," and he responded with: "I'm not Chuck Bass without you." Awwww. They resolved to keep the games inside the bedroom, playing incompetent waiter and under-served restaurant customer. Wow! It's like they're already middle-aged. lol
Acting more her age, Serena spent the entire summer trying to get photographed doing questionable things, like partying it up in clubs and making appearances at several locations that minors aren't welcome. No worries. She isn't back to her old ways. She was trying to get her father's attention, since after Carter helped her find him, he refused to see her. *Gasp* Everyone loves S...except her father. And by the desperate and threatening voice mail messages she leaves him, I think it's safe to bet she won't be giving up on this crusade any time soon. Lily, unfortunately, is too busy caring for her dying mother to regulate S's behavior, and she left Rufus in charge. Poor Rufus. He reunites with his true love and he's forced to babysit four kids for an entire summer. Granted, it was in the Hamptons, but that's still a long way away from his rock star tour from last year. With S under his care, he's about to see what real fatherhood feels like, especially since Carter seems to be taken with Serena, in the way that Chuck was with Blair. This could be the start of a recurring role on the series for Sebastian Stan, or maybe it's just a blip on S's radar till something better comes along. After all, he is Carter Baizen, and the show has to have at least one resident jerk. For now though he's helping her diligently with her attempts to get daddy's attention, he's effortlessly convincing her to sleep with him, and he's made no threats towards anyone. Impressive. Alright, so maybe I set the bar kind of low. lol
Rufus's real daddy issues will arise when his illegitimate son Scott tells him who he is. In the mean time, he's busy romancing Vanessa. Boy, I can't wait till she finds out that he initially befriended her to get closer to Dan and the Humphrey's. She's going to flip. Or maybe not. She did hookup with Nate one night in Prague and seems to be barely phased by it. Maybe now that she has dreadlocks (ill) she's totally chill about romantic entanglements. Then again, she could just be officially numb to Nate's faux good-guy persona. Ugh! I thought nothing of his random makeout session with a beautiful red head named Brie Buckley (Joanna Garcia from "Privileged"), who he just met on a helicopter ride, but I nearly barfed when he decided to use her to his own advantage after discovering she's a member of a family his grandfather despises. Ok fine, your grandfather's a prick. Introduce her to him and give him a silent f*ck you. But don't immediately brush her aside after she's served her purpose. Douche move. Not to mention, just because you're all gun-ho to chuck your family fortune doesn't mean she is, so maybe you should've told her she was making an appearance at an Archibald function before she taints her rep. Man, he's a self-centered douche. But I'm sure he'll get his. Not only is his grandfather planning on using their relationship to his advantage, but I bet Brie has something up her sleeve as well. Her sob story about rebelling against her family and wanting to be reaccepted into it seemed far too innocent. She seems like the perfect catalyst for a future scandal that either Chuck or Blair will have to save him from. Can't wait.
The only people who stayed out of trouble this summer were Dan, Lil J, and Justin. But that doesn't mean nothing's changed with them. If you remember, Dan always had a major problem with Serena's rich lifestyle and yuppy atmosphere. He never felt like he fit in, which, along with her overdramatic behavior, tore them apart. But he had all summer long to enjoy the wonders of the Hamptons, of free car services, designer clothing, and cash-filled wallets now that he has a new mommy. (Speaking of which, where's his real mom?) And Vanessa has noticed. She had the best lines of the night, making the comparison: "Even Frodo eventually gave into the power of the ring." She also slung some sass at the lovebirds after deciding to crash the Archibald polo match to confront Dan: "I'm sure Blair and Chuck will be there, if the murder-suicide I predicted hasn't happened yet."
However, I wouldn't say Dan has changed very much. He's still snarky and resistant to hob-nobbing too heavily, but he is a little more relaxed around the rich and the aimless. It's like GG said last year. He's not an outsider anymore. Nope. That title is reserved to Blair this season when they all start classes at NYU. By the previews it seems she doesn't want to associate with Dan, Vanessa, and Scott when they're on campus. She wants a new start. But when none of the Village kids want to acknowledge her greatness, she'll have to turn to Dan for a hipster makeover. I think I might die laughing. NYU is my alma mater, and while I won't say the average girl is anything like Blair, I will say that it'll be a joy to watch them eat her up and spit her out. Welcome to the Lower East Side bitch! lol