My laptop was acting up, so I missed out on a lot these past few days. Let's play catch-up:
• Twilight bested Quantum of Solace, grossing $3 mil more than Bond did in its opening weekend, with $70 million. Never underestimate the power of a good book. However, I have to give it up to the 2nd film in the Daniel Craig-Bond era for already grossing up to $527 mil worldwide in its second week. The animated film Bolt shoved Madagascar 2 out of the way to score the 3rd spot with $27 mil, which was actually only a third of what the African sequel grossed in its opening weekend. Role Models is still holding strong in its 3rd week with $48 mil. And the indie love story that everyone is buzzing about, Slumdog Millionaire, lept from the #24 spot to #11, grossing $1.6 mil in just 32 theaters. It actually had the highest per theater gross of the weekend, ahead of Twilight.
• The American Music Awards had loads of interesting moments. I particularly found Taylor Swift's angry rendition of "I'm Not a Princess," a song where she tells a guy who dumped her that she's not interested in getting back together, since it was most likely directed towards her ex Joe Jonas, who was in the audience. The Jonas' later performed "Tonight," a song about how a guy can't resolve an argument with a girl in just one night. That's about as scandalous as it gets. The skankiest it got, however, is when The Pussycat Dolls started their performance with the heart-wrenching ballad "I Hate This Part (Right Here)" wearing pleather and then segued into "When I Grow Up," humping stripper poles. I really don't see how they think we can take them seriously when they do things like that. It's almost as unbearable as seeing Rihanna wear a bedazzled eye patch while banging her curly mohawk to her latest single "Rehab." Is she trying to be a rock star or a pirate?
• I was triumphantly right about the identity of the killer on "True Blood." I knew it was Rene! Boy did that make for an awesome reveal. Of course, discovering that he also faked the Cajun accent and had the balls to try to murder Sookie in broad daylight, was just the icing on the cake. For those of you who feel sorry for Arlene, take comfort in knowing that the war torn Terry (who I just realized was Lane's hubbie on "Gilmore Girls") is pathetically flirting with her two weeks after Sookie stabbed a shovel through Rene's neck, uttering the funniest and yet most tragic pick-up line I've ever heard: "Your hair is like a sunset after a bomb went off...pretty." Only a war vet would say something that disjointed. Another highlight of the episode was when Tara expressed skepticism of her new rich mentor's intentions. After meeting another one of Maryann's charegs, she jokingly says, "Collecting stray black people, is that some kind of hobby of hers?" Later we discover that Maryann fondly refers to Sam as "You silly, silly dog." By the look on his trembling face, it's easy to assume that she knows he's a shapeshifter, and by her weird rituals with a copper-colored pig, chances are she is one too...and not the friendly kind. Knowing that is a better teaser for its return next summer than discovering that Bill's recovered from almost being burnt to a crisp while trying to save Sookie, or that he has to babysit the bloodthirsty wild child he sired, or that Sam has thousands of dollars stored in his office that he's disposing of, or that Lafayette was kidnapped by some creature, or that Jason found Jesus (not literally), or even that a mysterious woman was found dead in the backseat of Andy's car. Deceptive women are always more interesting than dead ones.
If I were to attempt a quick run-down of the TV plots of late, I'd say:
• There's a chance both former druggie Adriana and former bitch Brenda are pregnant on "90210." However, there's no doubt that Harry's long lost son (Josh Henderson from "Desperate Housewives" and Step Up) is a fake and the new cheerleader (Lauren London from This Christmas and "Entourage") is out to steal Dixon from Silver. Although I do wonder if Naomi's mom hired her so called son to drive a wedge between Harry and his wife. She is Naomi's mom after all. She didn't learn how to be a bitch by watching the original "90210."
• Betty and Mark bonded over their seemingly eternal assistant status on "Ugly Betty," when they both got accepted to an exclusive editor-training program, while Wilhelmina accepted that Connor is too good a man to cheat on his fiancee, even though it seems she's falling as hard for Daniel as he is for her. My favorite part between them was when Daniel met her students and he quoted one of them as saying, "I want to be a dancer, a monkey, and a Chinese person," proving yet again that kids do say the darndest things. The real golden moment of the episode though was the heart-stopping scene where Justin's new guy friend rejected him in front of his close-minded friends. Pobresito.
• On "Grey's Anatomy," Christina squeezed out the words "You're beautiful" from the verbally challenged hot doc Owen, someone finally told George that Lexie is in love with him, Meredith suddenly realized that her buddy Sadie is slightly wacko, Bailey came to the realization that perhaps General Surgery has become too boring for her, ghost-Denny did it with Izzie and promised to always be around, while Alex swore that until she dumped him, he wouldn't give up on her. Awww. Somebody needs to tell Denny to go away. He's overstayed his welcome as a ratings stunt. They went from hysterical pregnancies to hysterical orgasms. Shonda Rhimes has already said Izzie doesn't have a brain tumor, so either wishful thinking is really strong in Seattle or somebody's been sniffing too many medical products.
• "The Office" delivered a double whammy this week. Not only did we get to see Ryan's graceful exit for the rest of the season (since the actor is joining Quentin Tarantino's movie) when he dumped a confused Kelly and requested money and sex before he went, but Jim surprised Pam with a house, which he had us convinced would not go over well, and then hit us with the realization that buying a house for someone is actually pretty major...even if its your parents' house and there's an irremovable clown painting in it. I'd suggest inviting Michael over for a house-warming party. I'm sure if you leave him alone with it for a few minutes, he'll find a way to destroy it. Just be sure to mention how much you love it and how rare it is. It'll just burst into flames. Speaking of Michael and his ways, Toby's back!!! While it was entertaining to see Michael and Dwight gang up on poor, pathetic Toby, I was a little disappointed to discover that they went the whole episode without addressing how he's in love with Pam. No awkwardness, jealousy, or uncomfortable stares. Instead, they bored us with Pam's odd obsession of getting people to clean the microwave.
— Lastly, my favorite line from "30 Rock" was Jack's advice to Liz about her meet-and-greet with Steve Martin's kooky millionaire: "Like a Chinese gymnast: wear something tight, force a smile, and lie about your age." (Ouch!)
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