Friday, January 09, 2009

TV Highlights: Hayek on "30 Rock," Heart attack on "Ugly Betty," and Prisoner on "Grey's Anatomy"

"30 ROCK"
Funny moments:
• "Thank you for telling me what I already know Huffington Post."--Jack Donaghy's sassy response to his mother's new nurse (Salma Hayek) after her redundancy
Jack's attempt at pronouncing the Spanish word for an ice cone, piragua, as "peer-a-gwa," when it should be "pee-raa-gwa." It may seem like a subtle difference to you, but to the Hispanic people listening to your gringo ass, you sound like an idiot.
• I realize because Salma is Hispanic, there must be a Hispanic influence on the episode, but that was the worst Quinceañera I've ever seen in my entire life--and I've seen Mexican families of 8 living in a 2-bedroom apartment above a pizzeria throw a better Quinceañera that could rival a middle class wedding. I mean, the girl was wearing a jean jacket over her dress. Never! Ever! Ever! cover the dress.
• When Jack told Liz about the possible tumor on his testicle, instead of saying "Oh my god!," she said "Ill, my god!," which--while appropriate--was actually kind of unexpected.
• All of the midget jokes.
• I nearly died laughing when I realized that Kenneth was wrapping a portion of the Teen Witch "Top that!" rap song. Here's a little fun fact for you. The lead actress in that film is the older sister of Blake Lively from "Gossip Girl." If I were her sister, I would never let her forget that movie or that song.

"UGLY BETTY"
Funny moments:
Conner commended Daniel and Wilhelmina on working as good cop/bad cop during meetings, and Daniel corrected him, saying: "It isn't a thing, it's just that I'm nice and she's not." But Wilhelmina got him good when she responded, "Can I help it if my balls are bigger than his?"
Betty tried to cheer Daniel on for getting a great cover--Keira Knightley in a one-of-a-kind dress she demanded to wear--by chanting: "Go Daniel! Go Daniel!" in a ghetto way, and he abruptly stopped her with: "We talked about that." How many times? Cause I don't think she got the message. Maybe you should make her write a memo to herself, since apparently she also has to buy her own gifts.
• I love Marc's clever sing-songy phrases, so it's no suprise that when he tried to motivate Betty into networking, he came up with this geniusly insulting mantra: "You're a mean, not-so-lean, contact-getting machine. You're the Terminator. *Gasp* You're the Bettynator."
Not-so-funny moments
It sucks that news of someone like Lindsay Lohan being on the show gets mentioned a million times, but no one felt the need to mention Hairspray's Nikki Blonsky playing an Elle writer.
• Okay Hilda, she helped you get the salon ready half-way. You can't expect her to help you with the whole thing. She has a job too--one that requires her attention 90% of the day. Saying that you always help her isn't fair, because you've never had to give up something in order to do it. You're always free. She's given up plenty and she'll have to in the future, so you can either stand by her dream to become a journalist or try to make yourself seem completely helpless without her, which isn't the least bit true. Next week's guilt-trip, where Hilda will make Betty feel bad about not being present when her father had a heart attack, is going to get on my last nerve. Why did you need her there? So you can just weep in the corner while she does everything? She's not a doctor. Call 911. That said, I would never whole-heartedly choose my job over my family. Sorry Betty. The people you were networking with don't have family--they have money and business cards.

"GREY'S ANATOMY"
• I get that Bailey was being sort of unreasonable about not giving that new doc a chance, but I literally belted out "Is she fucking serious?" when I saw her skate away with those sneaker skates that are meant for children. She can't be serious. She should be fired on principle alone.
• After the deathrow prisoner explained what he was sent to jail for (slitting five women's throats for the pure joy of it), I still didn't see a problem with treating him with respect. If you take an oath as a doctor and say that you'll help everyone, then you have to. I would NEVER take that oath. Some people just don't deserve to be saved. But I know that I have no right to decide who lives or who dies, and that (among many other reasons: blood, etc.) is why I'm not a doctor, a judge, or a cop. Because if the decision were left up to me, his ass would've bled to death on that table.
• I didn't know that Alex was going to respond so indifferently to the fact that Izzie was fantasizing about Denny. I didn't know that Denny could feel sadness, especially since he's a figment of her imagination. And I didn't know that Sloane would eventually cave-in and sleep with Lexie again after making a pact with Callie to go cold-turkey. But I KNEW that after his patient decided to go to Denver to see the man that she threw away, that he would express his intention to sleep with Lexie by saying: "I'm going to Denver."

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