Monday, November 09, 2009

FILM: Spiderman 4 Villain, 2012 TV Series, Jolie & Depp, Paranormal Activity Knockoff, and more

• Rumor has it The Lizard, a doctor who was obsessed with helping wounded GIs regain their severed limbs, will be the only villain in the next Spiderman movie. After taking a look at him, me thinks they're going to have a lot of trouble replicating his reptilian movements and regeneration, which translates into "big budget." Also, his powers include talking to lizards telepathically, so they'll have a hell of a time making sure he doesn't come off like a caricature. I look forward to seeing this storyline, since it'll be another tale of dueling personalities, similar to Peter's fight against Venom. The Lizard and the human the doctor used to be have different agendas. It's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Peter's mission isn't just to save New York, but to save a good man.

• Woa! I never thought the day would come when George Clooney would be playing a dad. He just signed on for the family dramedy The Descendants written by the first-time novelist Kaui Hart Hemmings. It's about "a wealthy landowner who takes his two daughters on a search for his wife's lover in the hopes of keeping his family together." I would love it if her lover were someone like Gilles Marini and the wife were Julia Roberts, cause they have great chemistry and that guy is smoking hot.

Robert Pattinson just scored a role he was born for. Girls have been ogling him ever since his Twilight debut, and once he stars in the biopic of Guy de Maupassant, Bel Ami, women will be allowed to as well. He'll play "the 19th Century French writer, a young man who scandalously slept his way to the top of Paris' high society in the 1890's with some of the city's most influential women." Can't wait to see who he'll rustle bed sheets with. If he's lucky, maybe Angelina Jolie or Marion Cotillard will get in on this. And if we're lucky, there'll be plenty of nude scenes.

• 2012's finale has been leaked in favor of promoting its proposed spinoff series. [SPOILER] Super lucky and most likely important people are sardined into giant metal arks and shipped off to the only land mass that survives the cataclysmic destruction of Earth: Africa. Capitalizing off of the dystopian and apocalyptic trend that "FlashForward" and the "V" remake erupted from, ABC is developing a series called "2013." It'll chronicle the aftermath and the rebirth of a civlization, but on a smaller scale. At the core of it will be a group of people who managed to survive without getting on the boats. So it's kind of like "Lost," except there's no going back. It'll be an interesting insight into human nature, examining how certain people react when faced with the task of having to redo their lives. No more Twitter, no more cable, no more 9-5, no more cheerleading practice—just a reset button. Hopefully, they won't couple it with "FlashForward" or "V." That might be apocalypse overkill.

• That Tourist spy thriller is really having trouble nailing down a cast and crew. First Charlize Theron and Tom Cruise were attached with director Bharat Nalluri (Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day), then Angelina Jolie and Sam Worthington (Terminator Salvation) jumped on board, along with German director Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck. Now, with claims of "creative differences," Worthington and Florian have dropped out to be replaced by Johnny Depp and Alfonso Cuaron (Children of Men). I'm sure this happens in Hollywood all the time without public knowledge, but "creative differences" sounds like Jolie didn't want to headline a film with someone who was so green, and preferred someone with a little more box office clout. Clearly, she hasn't heard the buzz around Avatar, whose latest trailer is pretty sick.

• I'm loving the rise of Juno Temple (Year One and Atonement). In one of her upcoming projects she'll have the good forutne of starring alongside Sally Hawkins (Happy-Go-Lucky), Lisa Kudrow, and William H. Macy in Dirty Girl. "Set in the 1980s, the story centers around a high school tramp who becomes pals with a shy and overweight gay teen. They team up to find her real father in California." Too bad Josh Peck (The Wackness) isn't chubby anymore. Maybe Jonah Hill can fill in for him.

• I don't know how Isla Fisher, the wife of a comedian who's created so many humorous personalities, could possibly get so many horrible movie pitches. The latest project she's signed on for is Desperados, where she'll play a woman who "sends an indignant e-mail to her new beau, who's gone silent after they have sex. When she discovers he's comatose in a Mexican hospital, she races south of the border with her friends in tow to intercept the e-mail before he recovers." Really? Then again, Sacha Baron Cohen just signed on for a non-mockumentary comedy called Accidentes, where he'll play "a personal injury lawyer who becomes a blue-collar hero when he helps an immigrant win a case against his employer after an on-the-job accident."

• It sounds like Ashley Greene (Twilight) has signed on for a Paranormal Activity knock-off. The thriller dubbed The Apparition is a story "inspired by true events, which centers on a young couple haunted by a supernatural presence unleashed during a college experiment." Yeah, that sounds like a carbon copy. Lame.

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